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View Poll Results: Have you gotten asked out again after telling the guy/girl you have kids?
Yes 6 75.00%
No 2 25.00%
Voters: 8. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 08-03-2010, 12:06 PM
 
Location: Heart of Oklahoma
1,173 posts, read 1,338,077 times
Reputation: 466

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I started the "Breaking I have a child news" thread and it got me wondering - How many second dates do you get asked on after telling the guy/girl you have kids vs. not telling them right away?

This should get interesting...

Play nice, people!!
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Old 08-03-2010, 12:09 PM
 
1,041 posts, read 1,314,581 times
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My gf had a kid in a previous relationship and according to her, when she was on the dating scene, the difference when she mentionned her kid was that men quickly shift their interest from dating her to one-night stand.

So it's not much about getting asked out again, but for what reason you are getting asked out. For a long-term relationships or be the occasional f-buddy?
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Old 08-03-2010, 12:12 PM
 
Location: Heart of Oklahoma
1,173 posts, read 1,338,077 times
Reputation: 466
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeorgeLucasLongLostChin View Post
My gf had a kid in a previous relationship and according to her, when she was on the dating scene, the difference when she mentionned her kid was that men quickly shift their interest from dating her to one-night stand.

So it's not much about getting asked out again, but for what reason you are getting asked out. For a long-term relationships or be the occasional f-buddy?
I absolutely do not want to be a f-buddy.
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Old 08-03-2010, 12:24 PM
miu
 
Location: MA/NH
17,115 posts, read 34,614,964 times
Reputation: 16192
When you tell your first date that you have a child, you might want to elaborate on the whole situation. Just don't drop the c-bomb and move on to another topic of discussion. Be honest about why you got pregnant and if the child's father is still around. If he's not, explain that too. And you also want to be able to tell your date that you are not looking for a father for your child. Also, hopefully you can also tell him honestly that you are on a better birth control method now and that your next pregnancy will be after you get married, a planned event with the consent of your husband.

Guys are scared off by women who might accidentally get pregnant on them, or who might get pregnant to try to trap them into marrying them. And they also don't want to have to financially help raise children that were fathered by another guy.
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Old 08-03-2010, 12:26 PM
 
Location: Heart of Oklahoma
1,173 posts, read 1,338,077 times
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My son has a father and I've been on BC for the last 10 years. My son, Landon, simply was a surprise - and I love surprises!!
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:48 AM
 
1 posts, read 11,798 times
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so I'm 18 yrs old just graduating and had to transfer schools recently. upon entering this new school I did what any normal person would do and accepted the reality of the situation. I made friends where I could which led to becoming really good friends w/ this one girl, and inevitably making her my GF. towards the end of this year I'm told that a girl from my previous school has already had a pair of twins and claims that they belong to me. assuming that they are my children how would I go about telling my GF w/ out completely destroying her. keep in mind that we're fresh out of high school, she's smart, funny, beautiful, and she's still got her entire life ahead of her.
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:56 AM
 
2,520 posts, read 5,357,548 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LostBoy22 View Post
so I'm 18 yrs old just graduating and had to transfer schools recently. upon entering this new school I did what any normal person would do and accepted the reality of the situation. I made friends where I could which led to becoming really good friends w/ this one girl, and inevitably making her my GF. towards the end of this year I'm told that a girl from my previous school has already had a pair of twins and claims that they belong to me. assuming that they are my children how would I go about telling my GF w/ out completely destroying her. keep in mind that we're fresh out of high school, she's smart, funny, beautiful, and she's still got her entire life ahead of her.
You're starting this post on a thread from 2010. Maybe starting your own thread will get more responses.
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Old 05-30-2014, 08:02 AM
 
Location: The point of no return, er, NorCal
7,223 posts, read 4,644,337 times
Reputation: 9283
Quote:
P.S., for you childless or younger folks, say, <35, as you can see in my details located to the right >, I, gasp, have children. I am divorced and have only one baby daddy. Keep this in mind if you decide to strike up a conversation with me. I tend to exclusively date older men partly due to this reason -- they typically have children and are at a similar place in life.
My profile made it quite clear that I have children, so any many I went on dates with knew that before the interaction began.
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Old 05-30-2014, 08:15 AM
 
5,121 posts, read 5,556,201 times
Reputation: 5800
Quote:
Originally Posted by Metaphysique View Post
My profile made it quite clear that I have children, so any many I went on dates with knew that before the interaction began.
I always put in it in my profile too when I did online dating. Of course, most men my age are like me, divorced, and also have kids. So it's not really a big surprise for anyone all things considered. Actually, lots are surprised I only have one child as most people seem to have the cliche 2.5 children around here.

The only man I dated for any length of time, post divorce, knew I had a child before we started dating because he'd been a friend for years and knew me when I was married, including the when I was pregnant, etc, etc.

So every man I dated knew I had a child before the first date.
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Old 05-30-2014, 08:24 AM
 
3,009 posts, read 3,014,245 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean View Post
I always put in it in my profile too when I did online dating. Of course, most men my age are like me, divorced, and also have kids. So it's not really a big surprise for anyone all things considered. Actually, lots are surprised I only have one child as most people seem to have the cliche 2.5 children around here.

The only man I dated for any length of time, post divorce, knew I had a child before we started dating because he'd been a friend for years and knew me when I was married, including the when I was pregnant, etc, etc.

So every man I dated knew I had a child before the first date.
That is the way it should be why would a woman not be up front about it?
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