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I feel so frustrated. It's like every time I take one step forward I go two steps back. I've been talking to this guy for over four months. We've been dating without actually going on any dates smh. We've been intimate and theirs nothing more to it. We essentially go nowhere but around his neighborhood and home. On a few occasions we stepped out but only to do business related things.. (court, doctor etc.). Honestly I'm typing this and feel so stupid for it. Because I gave him my all. I was doing wifely duties without any title. His parents love me I have a great bond with them but he gives me nothing but the bare minimum. I found out that he had sex with someone else this weekend and that was enough for me to tell him I was leaving him because of the intimacy with someone else and the fact that even if I got over it I'm still going back to a non committed situation. He begged at first and asked me to come over to talk but I held my ground and told him no and we got off the phone. He only called me once after that which I didn't pick up. Besides the non committal which is clearly a deal breaker I love a lot about him. But my friend always says why buy the cow if he can get the milk for free. What should be my next move? I really want him but I know it's about time I pick my face off the floor and treat myself like I deserve more.
I feel so frustrated. It's like every time I take one step forward I go two steps back. I've been talking to this guy for over four months. We've been dating without actually going on any dates smh. We've been intimate and theirs nothing more to it. We essentially go nowhere but around his neighborhood and home. On a few occasions we stepped out but only to do business related things.. (court, doctor etc.). Honestly I'm typing this and feel so stupid for it. Because I gave him my all. I was doing wifely duties without any title. His parents love me I have a great bond with them but he gives me nothing but the bare minimum. I found out that he had sex with someone else this weekend and that was enough for me to tell him I was leaving him because of the intimacy with someone else and the fact that even if I got over it I'm still going back to a non committed situation. He begged at first and asked me to come over to talk but I held my ground and told him no and we got off the phone. He only called me once after that which I didn't pick up. Besides the non committal which is clearly a deal breaker I love a lot about him. But my friend always says why buy the cow if he can get the milk for free. What should be my next move? I really want him but I know it's about time I pick my face off the floor and treat myself like I deserve more.
Your next move???
Keep reading the bold ^^^ over and over again, and DO NOT engage him anymore.
Agreed with the 1st two answers. He just wants to keep everything casual because it reserves him the right to sleep around, and keep his dating options open because he's not committed to you.
After 4 months, he'd know whether, or not, he sees you as a woman he'd want to commit to. Clearly, he's not interested in you being his girlfriend. And the fact that he only does bare minimum with you is a sign he just sees you as a sex buddy, or a good enough option, for now - until he finds better. When he finds the woman he's really crazy about, he probably will make more effort.
Your next move should be to get on with your life and stop wasting time with someone who doesn't want the same things you do.
Easier said than done. I've invested physically and emotionally in dude. I'm definitely not going to talk to him for atleast two weeks and hope I can get over him in time. But I'm giving myself atleast that to get it together. So you think theres no hope for it?
I've been talking to this guy for over four months. We've been dating without actually going on any dates smh.
We've been intimate and theirs nothing more to it.
We essentially go nowhere but around his neighborhood and home.
I'm typing this and feel so stupid for it. I was doing wifely duties without any title.
...he gives me nothing but the bare minimum.
I found out that he had sex with someone else this weekend...
And THIS ^^^ is the fun "courtship" period in which you're supposed to be head-over-heels into each other. His indifference will most likely only get worse from here.
You say you've invested in him? And what have you gotten in return? Most people who put money into a Coke machine without getting a drink don't keep putting money in.
Agreed with the 1st two answers. After 4 months, he probably has an idea of what he wants. With you, he just wants to keep everything casual because it reserves him the right to sleep around, and keep his dating options open because he's not committed to you.
He basically wants you as a casual sex partner. But after 4 months, he'd know whether he wanted to date you, or not. Clearly, he's not interested in you being his girlfriend.
Not trying to throw out excuses for him but he did get out of a 7 year relationship in which he was engaged. This January just made a year since he's been out of that and he said he is scared to do that to himself again
Keep reading the bold ^^^ over and over again, and DO NOT engage him anymore.
=(
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