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if you compare this thread to what people would have written 50 years ago on young love and marriage, i think we are just a tiny bit less trusting. young love is like true love. we got a different take on it now dont we.
I got married at 21, had my first baby at 23, followed by two more. 13 years laters, the marriage is still strong. But, then, from the very beginning, we worked as a team. Even though I'm the only breadwinner in the house, we don't have separate bank accounts, and all of our belongings are mine as much as they are hers.
One advantage that I see in having kids in the early 20's is that the generational gap is not too wide. Another advantage is that my kids are growing up while I'm still young and have the energy to keep up with them. In the old days, most people used to marry young, have a lot of kids, and stayed together all the way to the end. The main problem today is that people don't think as "we", but rather think as "I".
Yeah, sounds like you guys are lucky - both of you!
I do believe in marrying young - not too set in your own ways, not too many people to compare to, not jaded, building everything from scratch together without any baggage... There are many advantages. All my friends from college who married their college BFs/GFs are still together. Sometimes I wish it worked the same way for me.
Me too. I went to 19 weddings in the first 8 years after college. 18 of those couples are still together. Three of my aunts married at 18 and all are still married. I will attend one of their 50th anniversary parties in a few months.
I got married at 21, had my first baby at 23, followed by two more. 13 years laters, the marriage is still strong. But, then, from the very beginning, we worked as a team. Even though I'm the only breadwinner in the house, we don't have separate bank accounts, and all of our belongings are mine as much as they are hers.
One advantage that I see in having kids in the early 20's is that the generational gap is not too wide. Another advantage is that my kids are growing up while I'm still young and have the energy to keep up with them. In the old days, most people used to marry young, have a lot of kids, and stayed together all the way to the end. The main problem today is that people don't think as "we", but rather think as "I".
a great post.
the grave danger is when everybody is saying "we" but living "I" except for you. CODA 12 step was created bek too many people were putting out 10,000 volts and getting back 3 volts. everybody is interested in what you can do for them. this stuff will make you crazy. parents, spouses, & lovers all fall victim to the lopsided relationship. 50 years ago marry young? no problem!!! today? ok to marry young but not ok to marry stupid.
Last edited by Huckleberry3911948; 08-26-2010 at 11:33 AM..
What's with this? Is this mainly something people my age do? Or do older people do this too?
I know someone that got a boyfriend some time during our freshman year of college. Then they got engaged over the summer. In September or October, they broke off the engagement. Their behavior after this was not normal, and it was clear that they were both devastated.
But then the girl got a new boyfriend shortly after this happened, and she's already married to the new boyfriend. After what she went through with her previous engagement, you'd think she wouldn't jump into another relationship so soon, let alone a marriage.
If you think I care too much about what other people do, you're missing the point.
This is serious. I don't think it's the smartest plan to get married to someone new so soon after an engagement gone wrong.
Who knows what could have been going on in her life? You're an outsider and don't have privy to her personal life. Could be a rebound marriage, could be that she realized what she really wanted in a relaitonship and found it, could be....
Who knows what could have been going on in her life? You're an outsider and don't have privy to her personal life. Could be a rebound marriage, could be that she realized what she really wanted in a relaitonship and found it, could be....
You're saying maybe she got married just to get back at her previous boyfriend and tell him "I don't need you"?
I also thought that might be a possibility.
But do you really think that's a stable basis for a marriage?
I married young and I don't regret it even though it didn't work out. I think love hits at any age. But I have encouraged my kids to get out there, travel, have their own businesses and enjoy life before getting married.
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People getting engaged/married too soon
