How to approach her? (women, family, American, college) - Dating, marriage, boyfriends, girlfriends, men, women, friends, attraction ... - City-Data Forum

HurricaneDC · 09-16-2010, 04:39 PM

Okay so there's this girl in my public health class who's stunning, seriously just gorgeous. I usually sit either a seat away from her or a few seats away, she seems pretty smart judging from what she says in class so that's good too.

But yeah, how the heck do I approach her? I've never been good with a simple "cold call" as it were, especially with women. I can't think of anything besides something stupid like "that was a good lecture huh" which I always imagine her responding with "uh yeah" and the conversation ending there. Either that or just being ignored.

**** me they need to write a manual on life.

burgler09 · 09-16-2010, 04:42 PM

oh come on man its easy, just go talk to her about anything.. class is simple bring up something about the class and then just let it go from there. if you have any ounce of people skills and she is somewhat interested in you there shouldnt be any troubles. don't stay on the topic of the class of course, ask a few questions and try to arrange meeting up to study but just get her blabbing about herself and then find some common interests and talk about that. boom ur set

HurricaneDC · 09-16-2010, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by burgler09

oh come on man its easy, just go talk to her about anything.. class is simple bring up something about the class and then just let it go from there. if you have any ounce of people skills and she is somewhat interested in you there shouldnt be any troubles. don't stay on the topic of the class of course, ask a few questions and try to arrange meeting up to study but just get her blabbing about herself and then find some common interests and talk about that. boom ur set

that's the thing, I ****ing suck at that. I'm great at entering a conversation, for instance today after my urban planning class I kinda just joined in on this conversation and then I ended up having a longer conversation with this one guy on the way to my next class. But I'm terrible at actually starting the conversation.

burgler09 · 09-16-2010, 04:57 PM

you don't have to have a 45 minute conversation with the girl.. make it quick , hell just ask the question and a couple things about her and then take off. then just talk more and more and invite her to study/hangout or anything. There have been times I literally walked up to a girl and said "hi will you tutor me in this?" . she replied "is it because i'm asian?" and i said.. well maybe.. and she agreed and we met up that weekend.

Its a lot easier than you think. Its not that hard, as long as she's within your league im sure she wont turn you down to study. From there you can see if you even have anything in common. Ive met up with girls and said to myself my god i will never talk to her again lol

mir86 · 09-16-2010, 05:02 PM

haha, for a minute I thought you might be describing my best friend. She's in public health and from D.C., but she's at A&M now in Texas..

Anyways, just go talk to her, be calm and talk to her like a buddy, but of course keeping in mind that she's a girl! and you'll be fine!

neuro · 09-16-2010, 05:14 PM

Do not try to do it all at once. You know you will see her again. Have your first gold to be an introduction and a short conversation. You next goal can be coffee and studying. Then you can ask her on a real date. Here are a dozen conversation starters taken from Random Get To Know You Questions, All Questions

How do you think the American family will change over the next 25 years?
What poem do you have committed to memory?
If you where offered the job of President would you take it? Why?
Why were you given your name?
What was the last national park you visited?
What cause are you willing to fight for?
What was the first thing you learned to cook?
What book can you read over and over again?
If you had it to do over again what would you study in school?
What did you do to get pocket money as a child?
What do you know how to say in a foreign language?
What is your all time favorite joke?

Good luck.

Ep- · 09-16-2010, 05:23 PM

just ask her how her day is going

it really is that simple

akck · 09-16-2010, 05:28 PM

It sounds like you need a lead-in question you can ask her. Since she participates in class, one way would be to ask her after class for clarification on something she said. Be prepared to ask a follow-up question, but also steer the conversation to something about her. If she seems in a rush, ask her if you can meet later to discuss it. Another way would be to complement her on a point she made and get a discussion going about it.

Lucario · 09-16-2010, 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ep-

just ask her how her day is going

it really is that simple

It is not that simple............It's a long way from "How's your day going" to "Let's go out" to "Let's........"

Most guys don't even get to the "Let's go out" stage.

Ep- · 09-16-2010, 08:14 PM

in college everyone always has a lot going on. its not hard to start a conversation by just asking someone whats going on. yeah you have to carry the conversation and have the balls to ask the girl to do something outside of class, but im not gonna sit here and chart out an entire conversation. just need to go with the flow.

but after asking how shes doing you can talk about the class, whats going on the weekend, her major, music, etc. not much too it. OP is just thinking into it too much