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Old 09-20-2010, 04:11 PM
 
2,385 posts, read 3,817,478 times
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And I mean EVERYONE. Friends, co-workers, family, strangers, even the guy who changed my oil today asked me why I wasn't married and didn't have kids.

It's like people don't think you're "normal" or something if you're a female and don't have kids by a certain age.

Is anyone else going through this?

What do you say to people who ask you that?
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:13 PM
 
25,740 posts, read 25,371,614 times
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It's social pressure. A whole lot of it. This really bugs me. (I'm married and have children, BTW.) I hate that women are pushed and prodded into their correct little "areas" at any given life stage. I mean WTH?

So stupid.
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:15 PM
 
1,198 posts, read 1,574,561 times
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So WHEN are you having kids?
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:18 PM
Ep-
 
2,070 posts, read 3,648,792 times
Reputation: 2427
pump out a kid and they will shut up
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:21 PM
 
Location: In my view finder.....
8,521 posts, read 13,983,931 times
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For me, people are surprised when I tell them I don't have children and I DON'T WANT ANY.

That's when they really get started..........good grief.
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:32 PM
 
Location: ATL with a side of Chicago
3,622 posts, read 5,084,908 times
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Another variation: people were always asking me when I'd have another child. Apparently, having only one child is "strange" to some people. "Don't you want him to have a brother or sister to grow up with?" Well, my child is a special needs child, and I just don't have the time for another. It wouldn't be fair to the other child.

It's not how I planned things, but it's how things are.
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:38 PM
 
Location: Eastern Washington
14,221 posts, read 44,887,015 times
Reputation: 12798
Quote:
Originally Posted by Violett View Post
And I mean EVERYONE. Friends, co-workers, family, strangers, even the guy who changed my oil today asked me why I wasn't married and didn't have kids.

It's like people don't think you're "normal" or something if you're a female and don't have kids by a certain age.

Is anyone else going through this?

What do you say to people who ask you that?
Well my usual retort is not suitable for mixed company. I'll just say it involves sheep, and leave it at that.

But back in the day I put such in their place smartly.

Since DW and I are both north of 50 I think it's understood it ain't happenin.

OP, are you somewhere in the Bible Belt? My sympathies if you are.
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:38 PM
 
Location: In my view finder.....
8,521 posts, read 13,983,931 times
Reputation: 8079
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neemy View Post
Another variation: people were always asking me when I'd have another child. Apparently, having only one child is "strange" to some people. "Don't you want him to have a brother or sister to grow up with?" Well, my child is a special needs child, and I just don't have the time for another. It wouldn't be fair to the other child.

It's not how I planned things, but it's how things are.
Isn't that something, people don't know a damn thing about your situation but always make suggestions on what you should do or could do.

My best friend says he gets a lot of flack when he mentions he has not traveled much. It burns him up because while others were out traveling and spending money he spent all of his money taking care of two ill parents.
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:41 PM
 
Location: ATL with a side of Chicago
3,622 posts, read 5,084,908 times
Reputation: 3925
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ron. View Post
Isn't that something, people don't know a damn thing about your situation but always make suggestions on what you should do or could do.

My best friend says he gets a lot of flack when he mentions he has not traveled much. It burns him up because while others were out traveling and spending money he spent all of his money taking care of two ill parents.
Exactly. Shuts them up really fast when you tell them you spend most of your time in doctor's offices and hospitals, and can't afford a nanny to watch the siblings.
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Old 09-20-2010, 04:43 PM
 
Location: Here.
13,855 posts, read 12,627,865 times
Reputation: 16243
I get asked this all the time. I don't let it bother me. People are well-meaning. Take it as a compliment that people think you are so lovable that they can't imagine you not wanting what they want. Heck, I often wonder why people get marry and have kids, although I don't ask them.
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