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I use vulgarities in speech - especially when I'm driving during rush hour traffic and get tailgated for the 20th time by some dipstick who hasn't quite noticed that it's rush hour traffic and the rest of the known world, including the car immediately ahead of me, is currently only going 30 MPH.
However, I also have the capability to control my peppered speech. Forget being ladylike. Consider it a statement of your station in life. If you feel you "can't" control your own words, then perhaps the best you will ever do in life is uncivilized. Your posts here indicate that this really is the best you can hope for. Perhaps you should just embrace it.
I use vulgarities in speech - especially when I'm driving during rush hour traffic and get tailgated for the 20th time by some dipstick who hasn't quite noticed that it's rush hour traffic and the rest of the known world, including the car immediately ahead of me, is currently only going 30 MPH.
However, I also have the capability to control my peppered speech. Forget being ladylike. Consider it a statement of your station in life. If you feel you "can't" control your own words, then perhaps the best you will ever do in life is uncivilized. Your posts here indicate that this really is the best you can hope for. Perhaps you should just embrace it.
So it is ok for you to be "uncivilized" as you describe it sometimes??
Again CD, thanks for the posters who are actually paying attention to the OP and your suggestions from it. I am sure from everything else I have accomplished in life, I know it will just take trying a few more suggestions and focus and I will be fine.
And to all the others... SUCK POO!!
I have been trying to stop that nasty habit as well (even though I am a blue collar worker type of guy) and have found a few things that work.
The most beneficial has been replacing words with something more funny. Like I no longer say WTF, instead I say "What the fannypack", and people get a chuckle out of this slight change because it is not a cliche anymore. Try replacing as many of your common swears with silliness and it gets people laughing, and makes you look creative and non-offensive.
A good way to stop using the F word is to only use it as the acronymn was really used for. You see it is not a word at all actually, it stands for "Fornication Under the Consent of the King", so unless you are a concubine living in a royal palace someplace...well the acronym just cannot be used appropriately right? (LOL) Just looking at that filthy filler word from its true meaning will get you to stop using it.
Good luck anyway and don't feel alone, I am getting rid of the filth from my mouth as well.
I set up a forum for a friend a year ago, and he didn't want any swearing on his board. I had a good time setting up the filter. I would type every word (George Carlin's 7 dirty words were just the beginning) and phrase I could think of, as well as any way people can get around it by using 0 instead of o, and $ instead of "s", etc. Instead of the standard asterisks, I would use totally random substitute words. When I was testing it, I asked the moderators in the Admin section to cuss me out, and be as creative as possible. Their posts turned into "You weebling pancake! Rollerskate sucker. Kiss my flower!!!!" I never laughed my flower off so hard at being chewed out!
I have not put a filter on my own forum, so people can say what they want (it's a private forum, so no big deal) but occasionally, as a joke, I would substitute random words for swear words, or even for commonly used non-swear words. I also would go changing the usernames on people for April Fool's Day. I have fun being an admin. Bwahahaha.
........I may cuss but one thing my mother did teach me is, if you aren't helping and don't have anything good to say, keep your effn mouth shut.
So THAT is where you got it - from your mom. That explains a lot then. Usually children who grow up in households where the parent uses profanity, will grow up to be the same way.
I understand now why you are seeking help for this problem that you are unable to remedy yourself - you dont want your kids to pick up on this habit. As a parent myself (not a single parent though) I understand wanting to set great examples for the children.
In addition to cutting out the profanity, you should also not say things like "Im fenda", "Y'all be...", "Im is" and be sure to fully pronounce your "TH" words and words with "R"s. For example: dont say "Who rang dat doe bell". Say "Who Rang the dooRbell".
Im serious about picking up some of those Sudoku books. Start with the White belt books first, then in a couple of years, you'll be ready for yellow Belt and/or Orange belt.
So THAT is where you got it - from your mom. That explains a lot then. Usually children who grow up in households where the parent uses profanity, will grow up to be the same way.
I understand now why you are seeking help for this problem that you are unable to remedy yourself - you dont want your kids to pick up on this habit. As a parent myself (not a single parent though) I understand wanting to set great examples for the children.
In addition to cutting out the profanity, you should also not say things like "Im fenda", "Y'all be...", "Im is" and be sure to fully pronounce your "TH" words and words with "R"s. For example: dont say "Who rang dat doe bell". Say "Who Rang the dooRbell".
Im serious about picking up some of those Sudoku books. Start with the White belt books first, then in a couple of years, you'll be ready for yellow Belt and/or Orange belt.
Good luck.
So you still need some attention huh? I have a little time to kill before I call it a night. SOO, let's see..ummm...did your sukdiku teach you how to be judgemental, simple minded and racist as well?
and since this is your SECOND EMPTY POST, I will use you as an example. If I were to be in public and asked this same question, obviously looking for better ways to handle this issue, and you said something like this, I not only would cuss your arse out but probably smak the ish out of you for being the type of person your comments reflect.
I am asking for help for valid reasons, I have tried to kick the habit on my own and have improved a great deal, but cant completely kick it. Just like an effn loser to try and tear down someones attempt to gain knowledge for self improvement, do you live in a crabpot? Just wondering!
As I mentioned in my earlier post, you are adding words unnecessary to get your point across *bolded words* (As an aside; people generally respond poorly to cuss words directed at themselves and rarely change behavior because of the usage of them.) You could leave the "arse" and "ish" statement out and the sentence works fine.
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I not only would cuss you out, but probably want to smack you for being the type of person your comments indicate you to be.
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Originally Posted by DuvalLuvah
My intelligence doesn't have **** to do with it, ***hole. Smh. I knew there had to be one...
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My intelligence has nothing to do with it. Though I wonder about yours from your posts
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Originally Posted by DuvalLuvah
No, those posts were just for entertainment purposes only. Seriously. I knew the types of folks we have the unfortunate opportunities to read posts from would come up in this thread as well. I think its amazing how people stereotype and prejudge others based on one aspect of their lives. They type about how ignorant and "stupid" the OP is, but just the fact that they post a negative comment on it, shows that they are beneath me and for the simple fact that, I may cuss but one thing my mother did teach me is, if you aren't helping and don't have anything good to say, keep your effn mouth shut.
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keep your mouth shut.
My point to all of this, if you truly want to improve your style of speech you should practice in both verbal and written forms. Bad habits are like rabbits, they tend to multiply when fed.
By the way to the poster that mention whether it OK for men but not a Lady to curse. It is not OK for a Gentleman to curse in normal speech. Neither being a Lady or a Gentleman means acting like the common clay. Though there are instances where it might become warranted,
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Frankly my Dear, I don't give a Damn.
Last edited by MattB4; 10-06-2010 at 08:19 PM..
Reason: needed some touch up
I have been trying to stop using bad language. I need some suggestions on motivation. I have told myself all of the why you shouldn'ts (i.e. unladylike, lack of better space fillers, etc.) I seriously need some help. I have made some recent improvement with a 25 cent/pop swear jar. But it has only helped a little..any suggestions?
I have done this before successfully... but sadly I've reverted to my old ways. Not because this didn't work, but because I honestly, truly relish the art of cussing.
Start with one forbidden swear word. Everytime you say this word, you do 100 sit ups (or crunches if you have a bad back).
By the end of the week you will have abs of steel, and your mouth will be sparkly clean.
On the topic of not swearing in front of kids. I have decided that I am not going to go out of my way to refrain. They know what you mean to say and they translate this in their brain. Even if you used some space language like "Oh frack" or "Smeg that" I think they know what you meant to say. I wouldn't go out of my way to be a dirty birdie but I also wouldn't feel bad if something accidentally came out. At work, the most senior, smartest people have never refrained from using cuss words. That's because they know it doesn't mean smeg.
I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier, but speak like you own a parrot. I can vouch for that, too, because one day my Nanday conure bit my ex on the earlobe. My ex said, "Ow, dammit," and for about six years, that was how my Nanday said "ow." He finally stopped about a year and a half ago. Now he just says, "OW" or "OW-OW" when he's angry.
But don't take it from me. Listen to Ruby.
[youtube]dUnu1osRCS8[/youtube]
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUnu1osRCS8]YouTube - X Rated Parrot 1 (The First Video)[/url]
I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier, but speak like you own a parrot. I can vouch for that, too, because one day my Nanday conure bit my ex on the earlobe. My ex said, "Ow, dammit," and for about six years, that was how my Nanday said "ow." He finally stopped about a year and a half ago. Now he just says, "OW" or "OW-OW" when he's angry.
As I mentioned in my earlier post, you are adding words unnecessary to get your point across *bolded words* (As an aside; people generally respond poorly to cuss words directed at themselves and rarely change behavior because of the usage of them.) You could leave the "arse" and "ish" statement out and the sentence works fine.
My point to all of this, if you truly want to improve your style of speech you should practice in both verbal and written forms. Bad habits are like rabbits, they tend to multiply when fed.
Originally Posted by DuvalLuvah No, those posts were just for entertainment purposes only. Seriously. I knew the types of folks we have the unfortunate opportunities to read posts from would come up in this thread as well. I think its amazing how people stereotype and prejudge others based on one aspect of their lives. They type about how ignorant and "stupid" the OP is, but just the fact that they post a negative comment on it, shows that they are beneath me and for the simple fact that, I may cuss but one thing my mother did teach me is, if you aren't helping and don't have anything good to say, keep your effn mouth shut.
I think you missed my point, in any of my other posts within this thread, do you see my using that language? No. I was exercising my sarcastic communication style in the posts to the neggie peggie I appreciate your ideas though. I do understand that cussing is generally considered space fillers. My written and verbal styles of communication are not in need of practice for any other reason than to stop the bad language. Some people may think it is a matter of just doing it, but for some others it has been something they have been subject to for long periods of time in their life and have more of an issue getting rid of. But again, thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it.
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I never laughed my flower off so hard at being chewed out!
