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Old 10-09-2010, 05:44 AM
 
239 posts, read 717,538 times
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Are you ever very attracted to someone who was terribly wrong for you, BUT that was what attracted you?

In my experience the most attractive men were always the ones who had traits that made them seem dangerous and so very wrong. I could see logically that they were not suited for me but something about these negative traits made them doubly attractive. I was so attracted to the side of them that was so different than me. Can you relate?
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Old 10-09-2010, 08:15 AM
 
Location: Wherever women are
19,022 posts, read 23,186,977 times
Reputation: 11309
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Outcast View Post
Are you ever very attracted to someone who was terribly wrong for you, BUT that was what attracted you?

In my experience the most attractive men were always the ones who had traits that made them seem dangerous and so very wrong. I could see logically that they were not suited for me but something about these negative traits made them doubly attractive. I was so attracted to the side of them that was so different than me. Can you relate?
Does this mean you are attracted to me, outcast
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Old 10-09-2010, 08:43 AM
 
Location: SoCal - Sherman Oaks & Woodland Hills
12,978 posts, read 27,431,779 times
Reputation: 10491
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Outcast View Post
Are you ever very attracted to someone who was terribly wrong for you, BUT that was what attracted you?

In my experience the most attractive men were always the ones who had traits that made them seem dangerous and so very wrong. I could see logically that they were not suited for me but something about these negative traits made them doubly attractive. I was so attracted to the side of them that was so different than me. Can you relate?
I am assuming that this post/question is for women only. Men do not have things like "oh Im so attracted to her but she is terribly wrong for me!" This is such a woman thing to say. We men, if we find out the woman is "wrong" or not what we want, we'll just bang her and move on.

Women are such silly emotional animals.
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Old 10-09-2010, 11:41 AM
 
8,862 posts, read 13,591,976 times
Reputation: 2280
Quote:
Originally Posted by LaoTzuMindFu View Post
I am assuming that this post/question is for women only. Men do not have things like "oh Im so attracted to her but she is terribly wrong for me!" This is such a woman thing to say. We men, if we find out the woman is "wrong" or not what we want, we'll just bang her and move on.

Women are such silly emotional animals.
cough--I've read a number of posts on this forum from men who experienced considerable angst from relationships--so I would infer that 'Some' men ascribe to the 'bang her and move on' theory--not the greatest of men.

It seems to me that anyone with sufficient depth would be able to respond the OP's query.
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Old 10-09-2010, 12:02 PM
 
Location: SoCal - Sherman Oaks & Woodland Hills
12,978 posts, read 27,431,779 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeAhike View Post
cough--I've read a number of posts on this forum from men who experienced considerable angst from relationships--so I would infer that 'Some' men ascribe to the 'bang her and move on' theory--not the greatest of men.

It seems to me that anyone with sufficient depth would be able to respond the OP's query.
Hey TakeAhike. Taekahike.
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Old 10-09-2010, 12:02 PM
 
1,860 posts, read 3,640,178 times
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"Alice" was a very pretty, curvy, and hot woman I met on the job in my younger years. She was aloof and in her own world and I broke company policy by calling her. She was taken aback but immediately insisted "we will only be friends." I agreed to it.

So we met for a daytime date on a weekend and we got along all right. She was indeed very good-looking and a few years older.

I sensed early on that the differences in our personalities were not only considerable, they posed too much of a gap between us for a relationship ever to work. But I was immature and didn't care, and aggressively pursued her.

I succeeded. But it was a messy painful breakup with a lot of drama. I regretted ever calling her. In the end, she did forgive me and move on - which was surprising, because given how pissed I had made her, she was unexpectedly quick to let go once the dust settled. I learned the hard way, though... if she is very different, if the dissonance is too loud, don't pursue it.

Why was I attracted? She was very pretty, curvy, and hot.

There's been others like this as well. That's when we men learn at last to look beyond the skin.
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Old 10-09-2010, 12:04 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 73,771,243 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeAhike View Post
It seems to me that anyone with sufficient depth would be able to respond the OP's query.
Being able to and being willing to are two different things.
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Old 10-09-2010, 01:05 PM
 
Location: Neither here nor there
14,810 posts, read 12,778,931 times
Reputation: 32891
This is not unusual. Many women are attracted to "bad boys". Happens all the time. Some women start pen pal relationships, and may even marry, prison inmates who have committed violent crimes. Scott Peterson comes to mind. I've read he gets tons of mail from women.
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Old 10-09-2010, 01:09 PM
 
Location: Maryland
2,653 posts, read 3,887,969 times
Reputation: 2297
I've dated a guy, single, no kids and never been married. Once, we really started communicating, then I knew. He wasn't the best match for me. It's so so difficult to find a childless man.

I hung on to him for a minute. He was a very very good bed mate. As someone said, I banged him out and moved on.
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Old 10-09-2010, 01:20 PM
 
8,862 posts, read 13,591,976 times
Reputation: 2280
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
Being able to and being willing to are two different things.
lol--

<LaoTzuMind fu said>

'Hey TakeAhike. Taekahike.'

I suppose he would like some sort of response, too.

I all I can say is <shrug>.

There are those for whom I have the highest regard and then there are others.
Even a response on a message board to a random question provides some insight into character.

So--to the OP--after a while I believe you learn to choose associates more wisely--or perhaps you don't. IIRC, this is 'delayed gratification'. All that glitters is not gold--do I want 'fool's gold'--no, I prefer 24K--wears well over the long haul.
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