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I've had the same experience. If a man couldn't read my "in your face" clues, than I assumed that he is either blind, gay or not interested.
What you assume makes me laugh.
Did it occur to you that your little in your face clues were playing against you and were the reason that the guy lost interest?
For most guys this is a complete turn off. Not because we don't have a pair and are afraid to go after a woman, like another commenter suggested.
Some men might be blind or gay, but most of us can read a woman when she acts like that. And what it says to us is that you want us to chase you. That just screams high maintenance.
Also, your complete lack of subtility, makes us think that a. you are not very intelligent or that b. you think we're not intelligent or c. both.
Did it occur to you that your little in your face clues were playing against you and were the reason that the guy lost interest?
For most guys this is a complete turn off. Not because we don't have a pair and are afraid to go after a woman, like another commenter suggested.
Some men might be blind or gay, but most of us can read a woman when she acts like that. And what it says to us is that you want us to chase you. That just screams high maintenance.
Also, your complete lack of subtility, makes us think that a. you are not very intelligent or that b. you think we're not intelligent or c. both.
Wow, I have a lot to say about that but I just realized that you are not a worthy opponent and therefore I will just be wasting my time.
Did it occur to you that your little in your face clues were playing against you and were the reason that the guy lost interest?
For most guys this is a complete turn off. Not because we don't have a pair and are afraid to go after a woman, like another commenter suggested.
Some men might be blind or gay, but most of us can read a woman when she acts like that. And what it says to us is that you want us to chase you. That just screams high maintenance.
Also, your complete lack of subtility, makes us think that a. you are not very intelligent or that b. you think we're not intelligent or c. both.
On second thought, I will respond.
Your post is full of assumptions too.
First of all, clearly, you think that my clues were someone of a slutty nature, which was never ever the case. It's simply expressing an interest and being flirtatious, or even just verbalizing my attraction towards the guy. Your assumptions that if a woman shows hints because she is high maitenance and wants to be chased is not a rule of thumb. I didn't want to be chased, I wanted him to ask me out and I showed interest.
Secondly, you have made an assumption that guys lost interest after my clues, however, there was only one time that I was turned away and it was only because a man was in a relationship. I don't have a long dating career anyway, I got married fairly young. Most of my relationships started mutually and my response to the thread was based on my personal limited dating experience only. I didn't say that this was the rule, I said that it was my own experience.
And lastly, if a man DID turn me away because of my hints or clues or something I've said or done (which really never happened, yes, I'm NOT being modest here) then why would I want him anyway? Why would I want an idiot AND a fool who automatically assumes the worst of me in my life? I wouldn't.
So here. I think you were totally off base in your reply to me specifically and now I have a complete understanding of why your girlfriend shuts you down. Yes, I went there.
Yes I do realize we are living in the 21st century, but called me old fashioned but I think the guy should be the one doing more of the chasing.
Whenever I ask my guy friends who should do the chasing I get mixed answers. Some of them say that they prefer if the girl would do more of the persuading/pursing in a relationship. But then my other guy friends say that they find it to be a turn off if a girl is more of the aggressor in the relationship.
In my opinion I think a relationship where the guy ends up liking the girl more lasts longer versus a relationship where the girl is the one who is more head-over-heels over the guy.
You are assuming that the girl doesn't feel the same and is perhaps just letting not letting the guy know . And i prefer to do the chasing.
That's what bothers me. I mean, I'm sure over my days, one of the girls I took out and thought I had chemistry with, and thought things went well, actually did like me and thought the same, but she played so hard to get that it went nowhere. That's what I'm saying, it's not attractive to me, and no it doesn't make me want you more at all, actually.
Maybe I'm different than most guys, but you know what? My career is probably the toughest to make it in the entire world, besides being an astronaut I guess, there are fewer of us than doctors by probably 500 times, and so it's quite enough stress, anxiety, and rejection per year. Do I really want another challenge in my personal life? No, I don't. I have enough challenges and stress from my work, so if she wants to play games and play hard to get, I'm out, just no time for that crap at all. Go play games with immature guys, I don't have the energy.
First of all, clearly, you think that my clues were someone of a slutty nature, which was never ever the case.
Funny how your first point is based on something I never said.
Quote:
Your assumptions that if a woman shows hints because she is high maitenance and wants to be chased is not a rule of thumb. I didn't want to be chased, I wanted him to ask me out and I showed interest.
I didn't say you are high maintenance, but a lot of guys interpret it that way. A lot of guys see no reason why they should for some obscure reason be the one asking you out when you're the one displaying interest. Does that makes you high maintenance? I don't know. But some guys will certainly see it that way.
I won't bother to read the rest of this, but I did notice your bad attempt at being incisive there.
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if a woman was chasing me
. And i prefer to do the chasing.
