Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Someone on another thread talked about how average looking guys will overlook average looking women and pursue the really attractive ones. There was also a thread on here about how to interpret the word average when it's used to describe someone's body type. Because most adults in this country are overweight, does average now mean overweight? Perhaps that explains why a lot of women on dating sites will only accept matches who are slender or athletic. In general, it does seem like being average is a bad thing. Women prefer men who are taller than average even though they themselves may be short. Men prefer women who are thinner than average even though they, meaning the men, may not be in the best shape. And I doubt you'll find many women who want a man whose you-know-what is average. The common theme is that people want better than average, in just about every way you can measure a person. A guy could look like George Constanza, but chances are he'll want a woman who's better than average. Same with an average looking woman. Why? Perhaps because they don't want to be seen as settling. Or perhaps because being with someone who's average will make you feel as though you're average too.
Do you think average will always have a negative connotation? And do you think this fear of average is why some people will never be truly happy with what they have?
I had a buddy who was average looking, but was a CPA and made a very nice salary (VP of the company he worked for). He was buying a house, his truck was new (designed to his specifications).......the dude just plainly had money! He'd pick above-average looking women to date, but the relationships never proceeded past the girlfriend/boyfriend thing. I think he was setting his standards just too high!
I'm average looking and when I was single and made a good salary (nothing like a CPA would), I only looked for average ladies to date. I never looked for the size 2 and stunning......just knew I couldn't afford that type any way. My wife, when I met her, was (and still is) average looking just as I am. We fit together just like a good-fitting shoe would feel on a foot!
My husband may have seemed average to many people but he definitely didn't seem average to me at all....He had all the qualities I was looking for in a friend and life partner...I was average when we met too...But I know he didn't view me as average....I went through a "blonde bombshell" period after my first divorce and I probably wasn't considered average back then....But I worked hard NOT to be average and was anorexic for too many years....Eventually I got tired of living such a shallow life and decided to develop myself on my "inside." Then I became more average-looking...And I wasn't interested in a "flashy" man anymore...I wanted someone who had some "depth" inside of him.
Someone on another thread talked about how average looking guys will overlook average looking women and pursue the really attractive ones. There was also a thread on here about how to interpret the word average when it's used to describe someone's body type. Because most adults in this country are overweight, does average now mean overweight? Perhaps that explains why a lot of women on dating sites will only accept matches who are slender or athletic. In general, it does seem like being average is a bad thing. Women prefer men who are taller than average even though they themselves may be short. Men prefer women who are thinner than average even though they, meaning the men, may not be in the best shape. And I doubt you'll find many women who want a man whose you-know-what is average.
I really believe that is a myth for the most part. For myself and all the other women I've known, when it comes to love, this is just not an issue that factors in.
The common theme is that people want better than average, in just about every way you can measure a person. A guy could look like George Constanza, but chances are he'll want a woman who's better than average. Same with an average looking woman. Why? Perhaps because they don't want to be seen as settling. Or perhaps because being with someone who's average will make you feel as though you're average too.
Yes, that is probably true.
Also, maybe subconsciously they are hoping to improve their future children's chances by throwing some better than average genes into the mix?
And do you think this fear of average is why some people will never be truly happy with what they have?
yes.. I think lots of people search for the holy grail of relationships while someone who might be prefect for them slips away right under their nose. Its good to be selective but sometimes people's filters get locked in, and they lose the open mindedness that just might find them true happiness.
yes.. I think lots of people search for the holy grail of relationships while someone who might be prefect for them slips away right under their nose. Its good to be selective but sometimes people's filters get locked in, and they lose the open mindedness that just might find them true happiness.
I think this is the biggest drawback to something like online dating. When you have so many choices, it's easy to be picky and hold out for something that's a 100% match. But in the real world, most people are flexible. They meet someone who isn't quite what they were hoping to find, but they're OK with that.
I don't think anyone is "average" in all respects. Everyone is a mix of characteristics, some of which may be above average, and some below. It's more about finding someone with a mix that works for you, where your characteristics work for them. You can be quite different in one aspect, such as looks, but find that other aspects more than compensate. However, mutual physical attraction is usually a key element in most relationships, but everyone may give a different weight or priority to that.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,004,411 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by DennyCrane
.............Do you think average will always have a negative connotation? ...............?
Yes and it will only get worse because the newer generations are more superficial than any other in recent history. You've got 20 and 30 somethings talking about 40+ers like they're subhuman and basically useless because of their age--especially concerning women--and you've got 20 and 30 somethings and even teens getting cosmetic surgery. No kidding. It's absurd. Hell, it's obscene! But as I said, it's only going to get worse.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
