My ex boyfriend is dating 19 year old girl (husbands, attractive, jealous)

[Skinbone]

Originally Posted by Georgianbelle

You need to quit worrying, thinking, or wondering about HIM. He is in the past, and you have to move on. He doesn't care about closure, understanding you, or your past relationship. There is no way you can force him to care. He has the right to date anyone he chooses, and a 19 year old girl is obviously who he wants. Get on with your life, and leave him alone.

Obvioulsy
This forum experience is a nice surprise for me! Sometimes is good to hear the same comment 20 times and actually get it

[Braunwyn]

Originally Posted by Nutz76

Let this be a lesson to other women who are "bored" with their relationships as what can happen. Early 30s for men is like the early 20s for women in how we're perceived and it's when guys really hit their stride. I keep telling guys to hold off settling down because they don't have any clue how great their options will be. Now he's got a nice fresh 18-19 year old to possibly settle down and have a family with who's body will bounce back much faster than an older woman will after having a few kids. That's pretty smart actually.

The only lesson here is one of delusion. It's simply highly unlikely that this 37 yr old man is going to settle down with a 19 yr old. Ime, 19 yr olds like to experiment, which is a part of being young, but soon enough the yuk factor takes hold.

Originally Posted by gwynedd1

Hi Skinbone,

How did it get so bad do you think? Where you being turned away, or just waiting for him? Also, just to cover the basics, did you do any of the following later in the relationship?

Hair styles for convenience or as suggested by girl friends.
Stop your exercise program
Gain weight
Wear comfortable clothes
Sex in the same place, and at the same time.
You stopped laughing at his jokes
You stopped listening to his "interesting comments"
etc.

I don't know why so many of you question her appearance. She has a pic in her profile and she's clearly a hottie. A thin one at that.

Originally Posted by Antlered Chamataka

Any 30+ guy who dates a teenager is a jackass. How do they even connect their maturity levels is beyond me

I can understand men going for sex in any way possible. The jackass comes into play when they think they're going to have these teens marry them.

Originally Posted by K-Luv

Diminishing sexual activities is a common trade-off for long term relationships. It would have happened eventually with any other guy. And it will happen with any other guy you become involved long-term in the future.

(And for all of you who claim to still be boinking hard-core after twenty years of marriage: Sure, there are exceptions, but go ahead, call me a liar).

Agreed. Ime, it seems to ebb and flow depending on what's going on in life. OTOH, if he's a musician and living a specific lifestyle (drinking to all hours, etc), that's not really conducive to a creative and enjoyable sex life.

Originally Posted by JerZ

Holy cow...you know, folks, before accusing the opposite sex (or anyone, really) of being bitter, maybe you should look at your own plate! Some posts on this thread are really "yikes"-worthy.

Indeed. Some plates here are filled with years and years of bitterness, which is comprised of being harshly rejected at one point or another I guess.

Originally Posted by he's so hott

Yep. After being crushed the way he was, I can understand his need for something lite and airy. 17 to 22 years olds are perfect for that. No nagging or sizing you up to see how you stack up. They're refreshing.

Agreed and that's key. Eventually, I figure, the sizing up takes place.

[malamute]

Originally Posted by Skinbone

ok, but i don't think dating is simple. love is not simple. I've put so much in this relationship. i was expecting at least him to try and understand me, doesn't matter if we will never be together again... just a healthier closure..

Yes but dating isn't commitment and dating does not mean you own that person.

If someone isn't ready for the hurt feelings and rejection, then they aren't ready to date.

[trishguard]

Originally Posted by wolfonaroadking

Skinbone, My heart goes out to you. However, let me give something to think about: First if yall were together that long and He did not marry you he was using you for your booty, and since he is with a 19 year old he has some problems that you do not need in your life. Write him off and go find yourself a older man that is secure in himself and that is full of life He will be someone you can relate to and you will be much happier

Maybe she was using him for his... They were both in the relationship for the same amount of time, either one could have ended it at any time or proposed marriage.

[Professor Griff]

Originally Posted by The Homogenizer

I'm saying that if you weren't married, he didn't want you. End of story. In my opinion, He. Did. Not. Want. You.

If you're saying that you don't care whether he wanted you or not and you stayed because you wanted him, whatever.

Regarding not being interested in dating, I'm not interested in cold medicine when I'm sick. I take it to get better.

Best of luck! I hope it works out for you.

And I guess you have a relationship timeline for when you expect people to marry, and if one party (the male, I assume) does not act within that timeline it means he does not want her? Makes sense, putting that kind of pressure on someone. I've known of people who've dated 5-10 years before marrying, and they've outlasted many other marriages that went as you think they should.

[bustaduke]

Originally Posted by sierraAZ

Wow, that's impressive! Such relationships don't tend to last. No matter what some claim, that kind of difference in the opposite direction IS different.

Yep it was weird at first knowing that he's around my age buy whats funny is after they've been together all these years he acts close to my moms age.lol

busta

[brajohns81]

Well I am sorry but you sort of pushed the guy out of the relationship. It just sounds like he was looking for someone and found it with a 19 year old. It could of been any age, but it happened with a 19 year old. People put too much importance on age. It is just a number. I have seen 40-something women that look a lot better and hotter than some 20 year olds and vice versa. I have seen men date women 10 years younger and some date women 10 years older. Age doesn't really matter.

I mean really, he is 37, it is not like 26 year old Anna Nicole Smith marrying that 90 year old.

[Skinbone]

Well, basically as I said few times in my earlier posts I don't care about the age, it was just a surprise for me that he started a new relationship so quickly after our breakup. It's over anyway... no use of thinking about it anymore... he can do what ever he wants, and so do I

[Raging-Hetero]

Originally Posted by Skinbone

Well, basically as I said few times in my earlier posts I don't care about the age, it was just a surprise for me that he started a new relationship so quickly after our breakup. It's over anyway... no use of thinking about it anymore... he can do what ever he wants, and so do I

[miyu]

Move on.... 9 years is more than enough time to figure things out. You're just hurt because he's dating a 19 year old. But really, it won't last. He's shown his true colors. He should have proposed by now, but didn't, and things expire after that.