If you are really someone's type, you can get away with more (dating, girlfriend)

[FelixTheCat]

Here's a story to illustrate what I mean. A girl works with a guy. They are both single. They talk here and there at work. They are friends, but have never hung out outside of work. The guy casually asks the girl if she wants to get some dinner. The girl says yes. They go out and the guy thinks it's a date. The girl thinks they are friends. The girl is put off by the guy acting as if it is a date. The friendship breaks apart.

I think that the girl is only put off by the assumption that it is a date and not a co-worker after work hang out, because he is not her type. If he were her type, she would have called it a date and not felt the behavior was weird or unexpected. So all things equal, except how attracted she is to him.

That is a true story, that a female friend told me about her and her coworker. I just think that the more you are someone's type, the more that you can approach them in any way or at any time. If you are not at all her type, then the exact same behavior is a little creepy.

[Lucario]

Originally Posted by FelixTheCat

Here's a story to illustrate what I mean. A girl works with a guy. They are both single. They talk here and there at work. They are friends, but have never hung out outside of work. The guy casually asks the girl if she wants to get some dinner. The girl says yes. They go out and the guy thinks it's a date. The girl thinks they are friends. The girl is put off by the guy acting as if it is a date. The friendship breaks apart.

I think that the girl is only put off by the assumption that it is a date and not a co-worker after work hang out, because he is not her type. If he were her type, she would have called it a date and not felt the behavior was weird or unexpected. So all things equal, except how attracted she is to him.

That is a true story, that a female friend told me about her and her coworker. I just think that the more you are someone's type, the more that you can approach them in any way or at any time. If you are not at all her type, then the exact same behavior is a little creepy.

It's not even about "types," per se. If you're attractive, hot, whatever, you can get away with things that the unattractive cannot. Simple as that.

[the minx]

Originally Posted by Lucario

It's not even about "types," per se. If you're attractive, hot, whatever, you can get away with things that the unattractive cannot. Simple as that.

Exactly. I'm ugly as sin so I have to be sweet as pie to make up for it.

[paladinking]

Yes, of course, to find their own favorite type.

[imsh0t]

I agree its not "type". Attractiveness is more important in the beginning of the relationship then personality/type. If your hot she'll call it a date even if she doesn't want to be your girlfriend. If your ugly then never. And if your average, then you have a chance to let your personality shine.

[FelixTheCat]

Originally Posted by spinx

Exactly. I'm ugly as sin so I have to be sweet as pie to make up for it.

I think women perceive me as average or better than average looking because that's the attractiveness of those who I have dated. A male friend of mine is probably around a 9, but he is 30 now and told me that he has to use his personality more than when he was younger. He is still really immature for his age and I think that he would have been better off if he were average to begin with, so he would have developed his personality more. He will lose his looks and won't have the personality to back it up. Anyway, I have come around to being a lot more attracted to women who are really nice and smart and the better looking women without those qualities have become boring. But I find those women are sort of hiding, like they didn't do well dating and aren't out there as much.

[WestCobb]

Wow... this was the most obvious thing I think I've ever read. So if a woman finds a man attractive she wants to date him, but if she doesn't, she is interested in friendship only? Thanks for the tip.

[temptation001]

So the guy knew he is unattractive and still played an attractive man's game and was surprised by the results? Who are we trying to kid here?

[macgeek]

rule of thumb: DON'T SH*T WHERE YOU EAT!

It takes a VERY special, and mature minds / attitudes to work together / have a relationship together.
I think even if there 'was' attraction, I believe the other person knew it was a bad idea.

Jonathan

[allenk893]

I hate when women do that. Accept a date somewhere and then act all surprised when you think your on a date. Ridiculous. She must have thought the guy was gay and was inviting her to brunch and gossip. No offense to gays.