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Humm.. to me it seems a small thing.
And small things add up my dear.
Just relax and go.
My hubs never ever went and I always felt out of place with no one there with me and I have worked for large hospitals. It is a show of respect to your employer that you go. One year I got employee of the year (a complete surprise) and had noone to share it with. Pretty embarrassing.
Do you force your wife to go to a Christmas party?
Quote:
Originally Posted by algia
The choice: is to take our baby to the party or my husband won't go by himself! WHAT? why should I be forced to go to a party with ppl I have nothing in common with, I don't see them, they never come to our house...he never be-friends them to that point.....(no idea why) and now I show up and do what? care for the baby while he cracks office jokes with his colleagues?
I am SAHM, and beyond my kids I don't see anyone since moving to FL...I hate that but there is nothing I can do, we tried to make friends with ppl around but it never went anywhere...but why should I now be forced to go or he will not go? Is this some twisted "American Culture" thing? I am European and Have NEVER heard of such thing!
I don't want my baby at a Christmas party where alcohol is served and generally is no place for a baby! or is this some "new" humiliation tactic I am not aware off?
Thoughts?
TX
You ask for thoughts? a Christmas party is no place for a baby, or any other child. It is a place for adults. You have heard of people hiring babysitters? Do they do that in Europe? Maybe you need to get used to some 'twisted American Cultural' things if you are going to live here. I don't see it as a husband forcing you to go to a Christmas Party by not going himself if you drag your baby along. I see it as him using good sense. I would think as a wife you would want to get out of the house as away from kids for an evening. I can understand you not knowing anyone, you stay home and don't see anyone else. You have to make an effort to make and keep friends. You are not being fair to yourself or your husband. I don't see how a relationship with someone who has your attitude can last very long. Not everything is about you.
OP, sounds like you've got alot to get off your shoulders beyond this Christmas party. I read alot of resentment coming through your posts. I do think it's inappropriate to take a baby to an adult Christmas party. If your husband is willing to get a sitter, you should support him and attend. It isn't about you socializing with people you don't know, it's about supporting your spouse. Now whether you are willing to do that is up to you.
The choice: is to take our baby to the party or my husband won't go by himself! WHAT? why should I be forced to go to a party with ppl I have nothing in common with, I don't see them, they never come to our house...he never be-friends them to that point.....(no idea why) and now I show up and do what? care for the baby while he cracks office jokes with his colleagues?
I am SAHM, and beyond my kids I don't see anyone since moving to FL...I hate that but there is nothing I can do, we tried to make friends with ppl around but it never went anywhere...but why should I now be forced to go or he will not go? Is this some twisted "American Culture" thing? I am European and Have NEVER heard of such thing!
I don't want my baby at a Christmas party where alcohol is served and generally is no place for a baby! or is this some "new" humiliation tactic I am not aware off?
Thoughts?
TX
I haven't read responses of others, but here is my take on this:
If it's that important to him, you should go. Your baby will not know the difference whether or not there is an alcohol served. Sounds like a lame excuse. Take two cars, make an appearance, introduce yourself to his co-workers, giggle at few jokes and when the baby starts getting fussy, excuse yourself and leave. I don't see it as a big deal at all.
I haven't read whether or not you can afford a babysitter, but that could be another option and perhaps the fact that you haven't made any friends in Florida comes from your unsocial attitude. You have now an opportunity to make few, just from this party alone. Just because you are a SAHM, doesn't mean that your life should only revolve around your children.
I wish I could go to the dentist....I would rather....would love to...
Meaning if I didn't go he won't go and then make ME feel bad about it!
I don't drink, makes me sick, the smell alone...never did never will....but I don't think he shouldn't go because "I" am not going! it's ridiculous, I wouldn't have him go if this was my xmas party and if he knew no one and most of all if the baby had to come......
I have no desire to make him "proud", I am his wife not his daughter.......plus, he is proud enough for every man in the world as it is!
I may get flamed for this, but I don't understand this attitude at all.
For those who cant read: HE DOES NOT WANT TO HIRE A BABY SITTER. Ever not just NOW.
He wants to take the baby to the party
These are people HE sees alone everyday! what's embarassing about that? I dont work there....he does not invite any of these ppl home ever.
IF we had a baby sitter I might have gone
I dont want to go to a party I basically have no business being at and drag my baby along too! Who said it is mandatory to bring someone along?
We have baby sitters in Europe, the "twisted" thing I was referring to was the fact that these are the ppl HE works with, not me and I see NO REASON for him not to go by himself.
Nothing is about me here, aside from the fact that I dont see one reason I should go and on top bring our baby.
He refuses to go by himself, when these are the people HE works with!
Quote:
Originally Posted by seeniorita
OP, sounds like you've got alot to get off your shoulders beyond this Christmas party. I read alot of resentment coming through your posts. I do think it's inappropriate to take a baby to an adult Christmas party. If your husband is willing to get a sitter, you should support him and attend. It isn't about you socializing with people you don't know, it's about supporting your spouse. Now whether you are willing to do that is up to you.
She's not some sort of trophy or medal for him to boost his ego and sense of self-worth with.
Oh please. One has nothing to do with the other. It's common sense that a husband wants to show off his family to his co-workers, it would be far more concerning if he was embarrassed by them.
Alright, OP, no reason to yell. If you don't want to go, don't go. It would be terrible if you went and then nagged and bitched about it the whole time and just embarrassed him there. Stay home and if he has any kind of common sense, he will go without you.
For those who cant read: HE DOES NOT WANT TO HIRE A BABY SITTER. Ever not just NOW.
He wants to take the baby to the party
These are people HE sees alone everyday! what's embarassing about that? I dont work there....he does not invite any of these ppl home ever.
IF we had a baby sitter I might have gone
I dont want to go to a party I basically have no business being at and drag my baby along too! Who said it is mandatory to bring someone along?
We have baby sitters in Europe, the "twisted" thing I was referring to was the fact that these are the ppl HE works with, not me and I see NO REASON for him not to go by himself.
Nothing is about me here, aside from the fact that I dont see one reason I should go and on top bring our baby.
He refuses to go by himself, when these are the people HE works with!
I can read just fine. I'm not the one you should be pissed at or throwing your BIG WORDS to. If you don't want to go...DON'T! No love lost here. I'm not the one who lives in your world, you are.
However, if you are going to come onto a public forum and ask for opinions...BE OPEN TO ALL OF THEM!!
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Do you force your wife to go to a Christmas party?
I'm not the one you should be pissed at or throwing your BIG WORDS to. If you don't want to go...DON'T! No love lost here. I'm not the one who lives in your world, you are. 
