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Hello, im a young male living in Northern VA, working for the government on a part time basis and going to School. I have alot of drive and alot of need to get to where i want to be. I like the field of planning and developement i guess because i grew up around it my whole life. I love city life, and i go out and have fun. Im not the hottest guy but i definitely dont see myself to be ugly either. I have a good amount of friends that i kinda stick out from because im the only one thats goes to college while they are all mechanics. I just dont understand the thought process or how things work sometimes. It seems like life and relationships come easier to them then it does a person like me. Am i doing wrong? Am i doing right? is it all about looks? or do Gal's out there actually look for a guy to settle with or who will take care of them, not just a fun hot month long trip. Some insight is appreciated
Give us some examples. Do you date? How long does it last? Stuff like that. Are these mechanic buddies of yours scoring on a regular basis? Are they HOT or have women falling all over them? Just wondering as you are comparing yourself to them. Help us out here
To answer the question in the title of this thread.... it usually happens as the girls mature/ grow up.
Perhaps you should take a step back and really see what kind of girls your mechanic friends are "scoring". Are they anything you'd like? Are your friends bouncing from one relationship to another, all the time? Is that something you'd like? I mean, they might have girlfriends all the time, but are they the kind girls you'd want to hook up with?
Don't sell yourself short, just to have a girlfriend.
I tell ya, as the girls get older and get their heads screwed on tighter, the more they appreciate a guy that doesn't come with a lot of "baggage". I'm pretty sure this can be said of guys too.
If your looking for long term then just be patient it will happen, you will meet the right person, if you push it you will meet the wrong person. Or go get a ton of tatto's and hang out in bars...J/K
I have dated maybe three times, one for 6 months, one for 11, and for 19months. The first two were two years younger and at the end of High school...the last one i really was into but she moved to FL and got crazy on me. My mechanic friends(keep in mind we are 2 years out of high school) one is all about you know what, and the other stays with the most immature girls. One is a normal 190lb good guy, the other is built to a T but is pretty dumb. Im 230lb,6', blonde hair, fair skin complexion, and I just cant seem to have anyone even turn their heads, and its not like i hide my head and i am completely quiet. I guess i have to stop bringing them around them lol. That has happened ALOT...Dont know though what im doing wrong.
well you are answering some of your own questions right there...
1) you are young
2) Your guy friends are dating girls even younger and more inmmature - which are easily influenced and naive. A rugged guy (more testoserone) will get more girls hands down, especially if the girls are immature.
Once girls grow up - and after a few fun, rugged guys they change gears and notice that what they really need is a stable partner. That's when a guy like you will strt to score way more - horrible to say - but I bet by 25 or better 28 you'll be getting many more girls then them AND of way better quality.
If you want flings til the "good ones" come along - look a little more "guy" and have charm and charisma, and be a little "bad"....girls flock to that. Just remember, if you are a loser you'll attract losers.
I have dated maybe three times, one for 6 months, one for 11, and for 19months. The first two were two years younger and at the end of High school...the last one i really was into but she moved to FL and got crazy on me. My mechanic friends(keep in mind we are 2 years out of high school) one is all about you know what, and the other stays with the most immature girls. One is a normal 190lb good guy, the other is built to a T but is pretty dumb. Im 230lb,6', blonde hair, fair skin complexion, and I just cant seem to have anyone even turn their heads, and its not like i hide my head and i am completely quiet. I guess i have to stop bringing them around them lol. That has happened ALOT...Dont know though what im doing wrong.
For someone that is approx 20yrs old, that's not a bad track record. 6,11,19 month relationships are fairly long term, it sounds to me like those just weren't the right one for you.
Are you looking to get married soon or something, because if that's what we're talking about, you may want to try dating someone a bit older that may be more ready for that type of relationship. However, if you are still in college, I am guessing that's not the current goal?
IMO and from my personal experience, a lot of women in this day and age are looking to play the field alittle, maybe even travel some, which is what I did. I am 32 and only have had 2 long term relationships, I married the second, but not until I was 27. That's not to say I wasn't open to long term relationships prior to getting married, I was just very selective and the right guy never came along. I wasn't a bar hopping kinda girl, even back then.
Maybe more info on exactly WHAT you want would be in order.
For someone that is approx 20yrs old, that's not a bad track record. 6,11,19 month relationships are fairly long term, it sounds to me like those just weren't the right one for you.
Are you looking to get married soon or something, because if that's what we're talking about, you may want to try dating someone a bit older that may be more ready for that type of relationship. However, if you are still in college, I am guessing that's not the current goal?
IMO and from my personal experience, a lot of women in this day and age are looking to play the field alittle, maybe even travel some, which is what I did. I am 32 and only have had 2 long term relationships, I married the second, but not until I was 27. That's not to say I wasn't open to long term relationships prior to getting married, I was just very selective and the right guy never came along. I wasn't a bar hopping kinda girl, even back then.
Maybe more info on exactly WHAT you want would be in order.
Im young and looking to become involved in Real Estate and or Urban Planning. The type i girl i like is obviously cute, loves to travel, does not have to sit on the phone for hours and call me everyday. Has a good happy life PRIOR to meeting me so that we can make each other happy. And does not mind hanging out and getting a little crazy at times. Im adventureous in everyway, Traveling, Relationships, whatever it is you name it. I just dont know where i am going wrong
ONce again - you are not going wrong. Just that girl is not really around yet - you'll need to grow older just as the girls need to grow older. There are some older girls who would be up for a younger guy - just not many.
PS - I was an Economist for Urban Planning. And I love to travel etc. But at age 21 I wasn't that mature of a person yet. I was hopping from one minimum wage job to another (in and out of college before I actually finished with an Econ degree)
"Many girls have to get their heart's broke, dogged out and disrespected, or dragged through the mud a couple of times before they can recognize a good man."
Most of my ex-girlfriends, after cheating on me or breaking up with me to date some guy who dogged them out, want to come back to me or tell one of my friends they made a big mistake and wish they had stayed with me. I guess I was just doing absurd things like, paying for dinner, picking them up in my car, opening the door for them, not trying to have sex with them just because I took them out, ya know...the abnormal stuff. But they always want the guy who called them out of their names, had 5 other girlfriends (in that city alone), wanted them to pay for everything. Yeah, for a while I just figured women were dumb, and was about to start dating women at least 10 yrs older than me (this is when I was in my early 20s). But I was blessed to have found a woman who appreciated those things I did for her. Yes, she'd been hurt before, but maybe that's what was needed so she could see what I was bringing to the table. I love doing for her, and trying to make up for the pain she endured. It's crazy out there. Guys ruin a lot of women's hearts. But a lot of times these little young girls are just that....little girls. They don't know what they want. They don't know love from infatuation. So I encourage you to not drop to your friends' level. Keep being a gentleman, a hard worker, and a good guy. I PROMISE you, in a few years (I take it that you're pretty young), you will be able to pick any woman you want! But take your time and pick the right one. There are Gold-diggers out there.
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