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Also, what I'd really like is the feedback of the twenty-something to early thirties females who are single and use dating sites. So, if you fit that category or are close to it, let me know.
I recieved a private comment that it would be like bragging and thus a turn-off to post this information. But, obviously women are turned on by ambition and succcess, so how does one walk this fine line?
I'm not a female. Posting your job title or position is enough to indicate your ambition and "success". Most people can link a salary to a job title through websites like salary.com.
I'm WAY out the age range of the respondents you'd prefer to hear from but did pass the question on this morning to three young women in the age group and, interestingly enough, they agreed with me that it's very tacky and something they not only wouldn't be in the least bit impressed with but would also find off-putting.
However, one thing to take into consideration is that I live in a very mobile, cosmopolitan and racially diverse place where internet dating is almost unheard of. People don't sit at home twiddling their fingers over a keyboard on dating sites but actually go out and socialize in person. However, the analogy is that as you wouldn't expect a prospective date to tell you in person, "I make six figures" right off the bat, neither would someone posting that on an internet dating site be any more appealing.
Reminds me of the first and last date with someone I met through a Personal Ad donkey's years ago and way before the internet. We exchanged a couple of letters and 'phone calls and then met at a restaurant for dinner. We both arrived in our respective vehicles in the parking lot at the same time and he insisted I first sit in his car to see how great it was. Snazzy little foreign sports car with leather upholstery and all the latest gizmos of that era which he lovingly pointed out with great detail where the cost was concerned. His leather driving gloves and how much they cost and even before we got into the restaurant I knew this was going to be the Date from Hades. And it was. I couldn't wait to politely extricate myself from this abominable mistake.
He called me the next day and before I could get a word in he told me that we were a really good match and that he had this luxury summer "cottage" on a lake in Maine where he kept a big power boat (worth such and such) and that we should spend a weekend together there to continue getting to know each other. He was already into scheduling and travel details before I was finally able to catch him between breaths and tell him that we really weren't a match and that I wasn't interested in pursuing the relationship. He was obviously gob-smacked and, for once, was lost for words.
Op, I get that you're trying to clear up an issue, but it's not going to come across like that. It's going to come across as crass...I know what you mean. I think it's stupid to feel embarrassed to talk about money, age, weight, etc. They are common facts of life. But putting them on your profile is going to seem tacky to a lot of people AND it may just attract the wrong kind of woman.
Better someone contact you because they feel good about the rest of your profile, anyway.
I personally think it's tacky to disclose what your income is, regardless of high or low it is. If someone's going to rule me in or out because of my income, I want nothing to do with them. At it is, I make a pretty good income for a single person, but I would hate for someone to be interested in me, in part, because of that. That's why whenever I tried online dating, I always left that field blank. Something like occupation I'll disclose. Again, if someone is looking for only specific occupations, then that tells me a lot about them. I work in IT. Not the most glamorous field, but certainly respectable and it pays well depending on what area you work in. But I've seen profiles on Match for example that would exclude me just for that reason alone.
So to the OP, if you're worried that people will think less of you because you don't have an easily defined occupation, so what? If someone's going to judge you without getting the full story, do you really want to have anything to do with that person? Don't post your income just for the sake of appeasing them.
Honestly, though, I chafe at the thought of writing "successful" on my profile. To me, that sounds much more crass than a simple disclosure. But, it seems like 90% of people don't like the practice of filling in the income range field, so I won't do it. It just is more of the dating game that must be played. And, it will make it difficult to separate me from the numerous less successful people who are using those terminologies to make themselves appear more successful but who are maxed out on luxury car rentals. Oh well.
Most dating sites include an option for "prefer not to disclose", if your income is in the higher brackets, I would use that.
As a woman, I wouldn't look upon self-employed as a negative.
Honestly, if your profile is well written, and you touch upon how much you enjoy being successfully self-employed, and did not disclose your income, I would assume that you were pretty successful in life. Or at least enough so, that if I thought I might like you as a person, I would meet/talk to learn more.
When you make a significant amount of money I think it is unwise to put that out on the table too early, for guys and girls.
So, it seems like most women believe it is bad form to post your income range (despite that they will secretly be trying to piece together thousands of clues to figure it out, but I digress).
Seems like the case is close unless there is a woman out there who feels otherwise.
As a guy who is somewhat intune with female thoughts LOL, I say dont post your income. That is tacky and it comes off as insecure. Like you have nothing good to offer besides your income (ie. you have a crap personality/no friends).
Just wear a nice suit/buttoned shirt, smile at the camera and place consultant as your occupation. That is good enough. Putting your six figure salary is either gonna make women think your lying, your insecure, or your a good target for golddiggers.
Its better if you emphasize things like good personality, sense of humor, creative, driven/passionate, romantic, risk-taking.
Those are things women want IN ADDITION to being successful. You want to attract a woman that will appreciate you not view you as an atm card. Whats the point of getting a materialistic girl that doesn't give a crap about you??
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