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Good grief. That took a hard left into OMG land for no reason. Thanks NY Annie for getting us back on track.
It wasn't about money for us but we opted for the no trinket gift route and have done this for about the last ten years. We look at ourselves and our family and we all have everything that we want, if we need anything, we buy it. While unwrapping gifts under a tree is fun, we all agreed years ago that it's an activity primarily for children, who have grown.
We normally send/give gifts of food. This year it was home made spiced crabapple butter and a chili wreath from New Mexico given to my mother and sibling households at our family Thanksgiving dinner as we all like to cook.
Back home in AK we usually make a very nice late afternoon dinner, bake some cookies, open some wine and our real treat is to rest from our projects for the day and watch old movies. Neither of us mind having no gifts. It was bright and not too cold on Christmas day and the skaters were out in force on our area lake. Our dog got to meet a few old friends on her late morning walk and all in all it was a good day which was for me the gift. Sounds trite but true. I love my husband and fully enjoy spending a low activity day hanging with him and our dog.
Welcome to my son's world. Born December 26th. You ever try to have a birthday party on December 26th? You try to overcompensate. You end up with little sister asking why he gets twice as much. You try to move the actual celebrating to a further date, but the kid wants to have it on HIS birthdate, but can't get anybody enthused.
I'm a 12/28 birthday, so essentially the same thing. I never found it traumatic, you learn to make due. When growing up, a lot of times we would make it a different date, sometimes have a party on the actual date....
Life's not always the way we want it, but you learn to enjoy what it is. I'm sorry for your son, it is an inconvenience, but it provides a good learning opportunity too.
Granted money is tight this year and we talked about paring down the gifts this year. Just curious if anyone else out there didn't get anything from their spouse/so for Christmas. My husband did say we would go out to dinner somewhere nice sometime soon, but it was still a little hard to have nothing under the tree....harder than I expected....
As someone who has been there, tell your husband - he may not realize how hard it ended up being for you - then give him some ideas - I like the one of a poster here about a picture and a letter - that would be priceless! It sounds as if it was a mutual agreement not to do gifts and it hit you harder than you thought - not that he was being intentionally inconsiderate or thoughtless.
Most importantly - if next year you do want gifts (regardless of cost) dont be a martyr and say so. Merry Xmas.
We bought a house. Money went to the home. Then again we spent a lot of time working on the house and that kind of took our minds off of not getting gifts this year. We limited our gifts to our kids to 3 each. Moving into the home was a major change anyway. We did keep our home and ourselves in the Christmas spirit by having friends and family over, spending time together, and decorating the tree. It was a fun Christmas.
There's a book called 'The Rules' and it mentions about how S/O, husbands, boyfriends should act around the holidays. To not get nothing...I'd be a bit concerned.
In fact, when the holidays and my birthday comes around...Thats precisely the time I determine out who needs to be kicked out the curb in my relationship/friendship life. Friends get some leeway especially if I happen to not be in town at the time. Lovers...they need to show some kind of love.
If they don't call, don't see me or even do something to show that they care...I let them go.
Now, this year I couldn't get everyone presents and what not...but atleast some holiday should be recognized
Our Christmas this year was very, very different. This time it was just us. Husband chose not to include others for Christmas dinner, which is very unlike him. So we enjoyed a simpler dinner, which was later in the evening because we didn't feel rushed.
I burned all the frankincense I wanted without having to worry about choking someone else out of the house, we saw a Christmas show for the first time (Radio City Rockettes), shopped together on the Eve, and just had a good ol' time. I've a hunch he wouldn't want it this way every year but it was a good change. No guilt whatsoever. The mild weather was a boon for me, too (although he would have preferred some snow).
There is no right way to enjoy Christmas. What's important is that it be as close to pleasing both sides as possible, which can be a challenge. And to those who, like myself, enjoy gifts, do not feel reserved about sayingso when the season begins! There is usually compromise to be found.
wow. Talk about the Christmas cheer lol. Leave CM alone before coal is thrown at you.
Any way, I received a gift from my late brother this year. He was hit by a car before he died and had a law suit going. My mom collected 15k from it and gave me three of it for my new kitchen ceiling. I've been wanting a ceiling for so long!
I did not let my dh spend any money for a gift (he got headphones), but he did end up picking up a peanuts book for me. I'm collecting my fav children stories for our future brood. My grandmother always regifts and I was excited to see what it would be this year. In the past I've received gifts I've previously given to her lol. This year I got a classic sequence sweater that only an 80 yr old would wear. And it doesn't fit. I think I'll cut it up and make her a bag for next year out of it. Aside from that, no personal gifts for me, which is fine.
I made a lot of gifts this year and the family loved it. I wire wrapped a gem stone rosary for my mom, which also had a sterling crucifix and center piece. I also had an engraved, sterling round piece attached which had a prayer for my brother on it. For my dh's family, I made everyone jewelry out of the abalone they collected on vacation. All in all it was 12 pieces.
For whatever reason my family has fallen into the habit of giving speciality food and drink items to each other. Very practical. One year our motto was "say it with pork". LOL.
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