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I also notice that the "nice guys" who complain about women not liking them are the very same ones who wouldn't dare date a woman unless she was very good looking. Maybe if these "nice guys" want women to treat them with respect they should do the same.
Just like a lot of young girls chase after bad boys, a lot of men including the "nice" guys chase after hot women. But these women will often have very little going for them beyond their looks and many do what "bad boys" do and treat their partners like dirt. So the guy eventually moves on. But what's funny is that, unlike the young girl who's learned to stop chasing after the bad boy and instead find a the nice guy, the men will continue chasing after the hot women. But now that those men are older, they have to look at younger women in order to find someone they think is hot enough. Meanwhile, the nice guys will be pretty jaded, either because they kept getting passed over in favor of the bad boys or because the few hot girls they did snag took them for granted. So you basically have a bunch of older men who are either completed jaded about women OR they're just not interested in women their own age. Hmm.
That brings up a good point, from a simple practice makes perfect perspective. If nice guys are always getting "crowded out" by bad boys who don't have the "baggage" of a nice guy, are women being realistic in their expectations of a relationship? Let's assume that a nice guy doesn't want to become a bad boy because then he would no longer be a nice guy or be entitled to the character of a nice guy.
I agree with post number 70 that it could be a numbers game, but that specifically seems to exclude soul mate theory. In my view, it would be easier for nice guys to find a potential mate before becoming sufficiently jaded to become a bad boy or resort to the law of large numbers. It could be one reason for some of us wanting to practice better money management and hopefully establish a five thousand dollar an hour petty cash fund for such purposes.
Last edited by danielpalos; 01-06-2011 at 09:22 AM..
Just like a lot of young girls chase after bad boys, a lot of men including the "nice" guys chase after hot women. But these women will often have very little going for them beyond their looks and many do what "bad boys" do and treat their partners like dirt. So the guy eventually moves on. But what's funny is that, unlike the young girl who's learned to stop chasing after the bad boy and instead find a the nice guy, the men will continue chasing after the hot women. But now that those men are older, they have to look at younger women in order to find someone they think is hot enough. Meanwhile, the nice guys will be pretty jaded, either because they kept getting passed over in favor of the bad boys or because the few hot girls they did snag took them for granted. So you basically have a bunch of older men who are either completed jaded about women OR they're just not interested in women their own age. Hmm.
But it seems there are also a lot of 'pretty' or 'cute' women who still prefer the 'bad boy.'
sometimes guys that are genuinely nice (they do exist) get taken advantage of which can make them think that they need to change things up a little bit. the key for the genuine nice guy is to find the girl that genuinely appreciates the fact that he's a nice guy and treats him the way he deserves to be treated.
successful relationships are give and take with both parties treating each other with mutual respect. when things are right with my marriage i'm the nicest and happiest guy in the world. of course we have to be prepared for the day when one person is just having a bad day and isn't so nice. that's when you fall back on the memory of yesterday when she/he did something nice for you "just because" and return the favor.
we all want the ideal relationship but it takes a lot of hard work to find it and then even more work to keep it going. and of course we all have a different idea of what "ideal" is. Love, peace, and Happy New Year everyone!
My feeling is that men shouldn't worry about what category they are in and just be who they are. I mean, my god, if a guy is that worked up about it how can anyone appreciate anything else about the person. It seems the Nice guy is placing such an importance on his niceness that of course he's going to get overlooked. I say place importance on yourself as a person not because of how you act.
My feeling is that men shouldn't worry about what category they are in and just be who they are. I mean, my god, if a guy is that worked up about it how can anyone appreciate anything else about the person. It seems the Nice guy is placing such an importance on his niceness that of course he's going to get overlooked. I say place importance on yourself as a person not because of how you act.
I couldn't agree more.
Plus being a nice guy does NOT equal being a doormat.
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nice guys
