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You should make it clear at the time you are asked out that you expect the woman to pay. If you do not you have no room to complain.
But women don't have to make anything clear. If they get asked out they demand to have their stuff paid for. Why should he make it clear if it is a rule women totally support that whoever asks pays? which makes sense for women to support it since it is not common for women to ask men out anyways.
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Originally Posted by boodhabunny
You don't have periods, isn't that nice? That totally works in your favor and it's not fair!
*stomps feet*
Men should pay every time, all the time, until the end of time, because they don't endure periods. And trust me, they are getting the better end of the deal, by far.
Keep enjoying your perks as a man. More power to ya'
So having periods gives you the priviledge to have men pay for your way of life? No wonder you have said before that if a man doesn't over spend on your flowers and chocolate, jewelry, etc. it means he doesn't love you. Periods or not, you still get to enjoy doing all things men do and still demand for special treatment. In your case, you have made it clear you don't do anything for the men that take you out because, you are the woman. It doesn't surprise really. Lots of women think like you. I guess it can also be a cultural thing.
Oni-what I am getting here, is if the woman pays, then she is "doing something for the man". what if she's mean, but pays anyways? I don't understand your logic, at all.
There's other ways I can feel like less of a woman on the account of a man. I've never had this happen to me (and hope it doesn't), but if my sex drive ever died, I would feel like less of a woman, as I would have lost my drive to do something for my man..so that's one example
But it is, in a way, common for women to stop having sex once married. I am sure women are capable of more than just having sex. That is why I don't understand why they limit themselves to just showing up to a date. I am totally fine washing dishes, cooking, watering the flowers at my yard, combing my relative's daughter or son to get ready for an event, take out the pooch for a walk, etc. Nothing stops me from doing those things that others may consider "not so masculine". Don't see what holds women from doing all those things they demand/expect from men.
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I think you think men and women are the exact same creature. We're wired differently, therefore each gender naturally is wired to various roles. Regardless, it ultimately is up to you what you want to do. I'm just simply stating what I personally like.
Cool. What you like seems to be the most common way to go for women. I may go a bit against tradition, same thing with the women who I take out and take me out as well. Go for it .
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Originally Posted by mir86
Oni-what I am getting here, is if the woman pays, then she is "doing something for the man". what if she's mean, but pays anyways? I don't understand your logic, at all.
No Mir86. It's more than just paying. See a man doesn't just pay and that's it. He prepares the whole date event. He'll pick a place, make the reservation if needed, etc. Same thing with the activities of the date. And he will pay for all of that. So he does more than just show up looking nice to grace you with his presence. He prepared a whole date for you and took care of it all. You just had to enjoy all that and thank him in the end. Are women capable of doing those things? Of course.
I frequently get asked out even though I'm a man and my only gripe about it is that the women never offer to pay.
I'm just saying, if a bunch of women ask me out, and they still expect me to pay then I'm going to go broke.
That's not cool ladies, if you ask a man out, YOU SHOULD OFFER TO PAY!
I always offer to pay or go dutch because I don't want the guy to assume that I will sleep with him.... but guys never let me pay because they are afraid of looking like a jackass. So then I give up trying to pay. What is the deal with that? Why complain that women don't pay, but then don't allow women to pay?
Now I am even conditioned into letting men (and women too by default) open all doors for me, because I am slow to do it since I am used to having others do it. My arms are getting so flabby.
In this day why would a woman not want to pay on a date? Its only fair, its only decent and it puts her in control of the evening. Are we still in the 1950s where the man paid for everything but the woman was expected to pay with her time, a kiss, maybe even some 50's style sex? We havent evolved very far if there is still a large group believing men should pay for all the dates.
Two women in particular whom I'd met and chatted with told me that they wanted to go out; suggested a restaurant; we got there, they ordered an extra appetizer, drinks, and one of the most expensive items on the menu, and then at the end, made absolutely zero motion to pay for even a portion of their meal. I'm a gentleman and expect to pay whenever I go out, but when a woman picks an expensive joint and proceeds to order a $35 plate, a $14 cocktail and a $20 glass of wine, plus a $20 appetizer, and then doesn't even offer to toss in a twenty, it sends a message about their character and what you can expect if you decide to continue wooing and ultimately start a relationship with her: to pay for everything and have her promptly lose interest the second you no longer can pay.
One of the girls, I had a second date with because she was cute as a button and had a lot of personality traits I liked other than her selfishness; then, she just pissed me off. The other? The conversation sucked, she needed to hit the gym, she was so far up her own hole she didn't realize she basically brought nothing to the table, and she ran up a hundred dollar tab on my dime. Never answered her back.
Why in the hell would you even go out with her then? Sorry, but your story smells.
No Mir86. It's more than just paying. See a man doesn't just pay and that's it. He prepares the whole date event. He'll pick a place, make the reservation if needed, etc. Same thing with the activities of the date. And he will pay for all of that. So he does more than just show up looking nice to grace you with his presence. He prepared a whole date for you and took care of it all. You just had to enjoy all that and thank him in the end. Are women capable of doing those things? Of course.
Here's the scoop. If YOU want me to go out with YOU, and I know little about you (in other words, we've not been dating), then you better suck it up and at least plan a decent evening, and be prepared to pay.
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