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Old 01-13-2011, 04:51 PM
 
6,046 posts, read 6,284,301 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
As a "product of the '70's" myself who was actually out on my own at 17 I so hear ya!

I think part of what's happened is that parents our age are the first generation to become completely kid-centric. In generations past, kids (including our generation!) were seen and not heard. Now kids are the center of family life and we have spoiled our kids to a degree by this.

Current 20 somethings have grown up with more material comforts, more material possessions and more of our time and attention than we got from our parents for sure.

We've made them so comfortable that they think. why would I want to move out and struggle when everything is so nice and cozy at home? Gee, I'd have to leave mom and dad's 50" flat screen if I move out! We were a generation that simply didn't care how spartan we had to live as long as we had our freedom and independence, lol.

To be fair to the 20 somethings of today, the world is a bit scarier these days though. Costs of an education are astronomical compared to what we had to pay. I used to be able to work all summer and have my school tuition for the whole year. My 21 year old could work all year and not pay for one semester of his college costs.

In addition, many parents our age are struggling with job losses these days. When families continue to live together they can pool their money and all live more affordably (though that only works if the parents have the balls to make the kids pay rent - many don't).
I know people that had to pay rent as soon as they turned 18. The reason is because their mom is a deadbeat that can barely afford to support herself so she wants her kids to support her. When their dad died, they got money in the form of death benefits, but the mom abused the money. Once the kids turned 18 and the mom no longer had access to that money, she makes them pay rent. She's not fooling anyone. This has nothing to do with teaching them responsibility.

The mom had access to her daughter's bank account and she took $15,000 from her daughter. Real responsible
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Old 01-13-2011, 04:58 PM
 
8,681 posts, read 7,797,116 times
Reputation: 14954
Quote:
Originally Posted by GWSB13 View Post
Wow, I couldn't written it out this well. If there was a round of applause button I would use it. Thank you
You're welcome.

And another thing... [URL="http://******************"]http://******************/not-tagged-smiley-13320.gif (broken link)[/URL]

This bit about taxes mentioned above is ridiculous. My nephew got out of school making about the same amount of money as the engineer, maybe a little less, in finance. He lived in apartments with roommates and group houses with some buddies until he could save up the money for a place in Hoboken, which isn't cheap. (Nice place, too, from what my sister tells me.) Took him six years, but he did it.

And Skeet, sorry your hub overextended himself in his youth, but there is no way anyone will ever convince me that a 28-year-old making 100K a year needs to live with his parents.

And yes, CD, I will make my statements about Millennial entitlement. I graduated college in 1988 and made just over 15K a year, which was not much at all then. I got an apartment with a classmate. Never mind that we had a rocking good time as two young, single women, no WAY was I going to be a further burden on my parents. They sacrificed to send me to a good school, and I was going to make it worth their while--and that is the difference between Gen-X and the Millennials. Far more of us than you had a sense of humility with not wanting to foist ourselves upon our parents, and far more of us than you took it as a point of pride to be grown-ups in the real world.

Don't shoot the messenger. You're 19, and harsh as this sounds, you haven't lived yet.
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Old 01-13-2011, 04:59 PM
 
3,511 posts, read 2,499,658 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by city_data91 View Post
I know people that had to pay rent as soon as they turned 18. The reason is because their mom is a deadbeat that can barely afford to support herself so she wants her kids to support her. When their dad died, they got money in the form of death benefits, but the mom abused the money. Once the kids turned 18 and the mom no longer had access to that money, she makes them pay rent. She's not fooling anyone. This has nothing to do with teaching them responsibility.

The mom had access to her daughter's bank account and she took $15,000 from her daughter. Real responsible
Nope, it's just flat out jealousy for being less fortunate. I've physically worked my a$$ off since I was 18. If you went to three places, you had a job by sundown. Try that now. Even if you do, it is some sh8tty $8 and hour dump. It's just not as easy to get started, simply put. The braggarts forget to mention $20-$25,000 three bedroom 1,100 square foot ranch houses as well. Those days are long since gone too. Someday, you'll get your own chance. Just be patient!
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:04 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,153 posts, read 57,085,003 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by city_data91 View Post
I know people that had to pay rent as soon as they turned 18. The reason is because their mom is a deadbeat that can barely afford to support herself so she wants her kids to support her. When their dad died, they got money in the form of death benefits, but the mom abused the money. Once the kids turned 18 and the mom no longer had access to that money, she makes them pay rent. She's not fooling anyone. This has nothing to do with teaching them responsibility.

The mom had access to her daughter's bank account and she took $15,000 from her daughter. Real responsible
One bad parent doesn't make all parents who ask their kids to pay rent wrong.
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:04 PM
 
8,681 posts, read 7,797,116 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Magritte25 View Post
Really? Interesting. Because from what I know of history (and I know a fair bit) the whole "leave at 18 and don't look back" type of thing is a new phenomena. It used to be that several generations lived under one roof.

Wonder how we made it this far?
I was born in 1966. My sisters were born in the 1950s. We were all out by 21, one way or another. Given that my eldest sister is 58, I don't consider the phenomenon to be "new."
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:04 PM
 
10,452 posts, read 5,708,009 times
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I don't think people are necessarily afraid. A lot of people just don't have the option to be independent for financial reasons. I bet many young people living with their parents hate having to and want nothing more than to get out, but they just can't make it paying their own rent right now. I can't wait to get out of my grandmother's basement. We're moving into a van so that we can get that independence but most people don't have the guts or don't think they can handle the idea of living out of a vehicle.
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:06 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX, USA
5,126 posts, read 7,237,589 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne View Post
And Skeet, sorry your hub overextended himself in his youth, but there is no way anyone will ever convince me that a 28-year-old making 100K a year needs to live with his parents.
He had the most reasonable apartment he could and still could not make it without a roommate.
It could be cultural. In some cultures, it is totally the norm to live with your parents until you marry no matter the income.
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:11 PM
 
6,046 posts, read 6,284,301 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne View Post
You're welcome.

And another thing...

This bit about taxes mentioned above is ridiculous. My nephew got out of school making about the same amount of money as the engineer, maybe a little less, in finance. He lived in apartments with roommates and group houses with some buddies until he could save up the money for a place in Hoboken, which isn't cheap. (Nice place, too, from what my sister tells me.) Took him six years, but he did it.

And Skeet, sorry your hub overextended himself in his youth, but there is no way anyone will ever convince me that a 28-year-old making 100K a year needs to live with his parents.

And yes, CD, I will make my statements about Millennial entitlement. I graduated college in 1988 and made just over 15K a year, which was not much at all then. I got an apartment with a classmate. Never mind that we had a rocking good time as two young, single women, no WAY was I going to be a further burden on my parents. They sacrificed to send me to a good school, and I was going to make it worth their while--and that is the difference between Gen-X and the Millennials. Far more of us than you had a sense of humility with not wanting to foist ourselves upon our parents, and far more of us than you took it as a point of pride to be grown-ups in the real world.

Don't shoot the messenger. You're 19, and harsh as this sounds, you haven't lived yet.
Ok, but what you fail to mention is that Gen X has entitled people too. I gave an example on this thread of someone that sat around his in-laws basement getting drunk until he got kicked out at 40. He's a Gen Xer and he sounds pretty entitled to me. In fact, he's more entitled than me. I don't want to live like that at 40. If my goal was to live like him, I wouldn't be in college. Why bother going to college and bettering myself if my goal was to live in someone's basement?

I have an aunt that was born in 1969 and graduated college in 1991. A definite Gen Xer. She's not nearly as entitled as the example I gave above. She has a house with my uncle and they've been supporting themselves for quite some time. But after my aunt graduated college, she lived with her parents (my grandparents) despite my grandparents saying their kids can't move in after college. I think she lived with them until she got married when I was 3 or 4...so 1994 or 1995. That's 3 or 4 years of a Gen Xer living with their parents after college (against the parents wishes).

By the way, I don't think 15K was overly low in 1988. My mom graduated in 1989 and made 22K, and she says that was average back then. Maybe 15K was just barely on the lower end, but not overly low.
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:12 PM
 
14,561 posts, read 8,967,899 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne View Post
I was born in 1966. My sisters were born in the 1950s. We were all out by 21, one way or another. Given that my eldest sister is 58, I don't consider the phenomenon to be "new."
It is new in the scheme of things, historically speaking. You were born in the SIXTIES? That is just now being considered "history" vs. "current events". LOL

Anywho, up until the Industrial Revolution, generations lived together under the same roof. It still happened after the revolution began, but by the time it was all said and done the nuclear family was born.
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Old 01-13-2011, 05:14 PM
 
14,561 posts, read 8,967,899 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne View Post

And Skeet, sorry your hub overextended himself in his youth, but there is no way anyone will ever convince me that a 28-year-old making 100K a year needs to live with his parents.
The friend I was talking about earlier makes about $85K a year. He still lives at home. He doesn't need to but it's how it's done in their family. He is the baby (a change of life one at that) who has 2 older brothers and 2 older sisters, who are all in their 40s. They all did this as well (stayed home til they married).
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