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I wonder if your ex wasn't bipolar? Not important. Don't wait around for time to heal your wounds. You need to re-invent your life in a positive way, something which involves a lot of action and a lot of learning by trial and error.
At some time, it might be good to back and look at this relationship and see if this is part of a larger pattern in your relationships with women and find out what you can do to change what underlies that pattern in the future (if you don't like it)
i'm sorry for you. you should not let her visit her exes. who does some one want to visit an ex?
i don't understand people who continues friendship with exes. you share so many things and of course you'll remember all the special and romantic moments and then start to feel something again
Believe me, I feel your pain all too well although when my husband just didn't return home from work one Friday, he was walking out on a marriage of 40 years. He's been gone now for almost four years and in some ways my plight is worse than yours because at least you knew why she left. I still don't really know except for some lame a$$ story about our "dysfunctional communication." As far as anyone can tell who knows him, he is all alone and all he does is go to work and then home. For a very long time I thought I could fix whatever was wrong but since I have no idea what that might be... So, I have finally called it quits and am filing for divorce within the next month or so (just waiting on a tax document). He has held me hostage far too long so please, ATXIronHorse, don't let your soon-to-be ex hold you emotionally hostage the way mine did. Make a clean break and start rebuilding your life. You seem like a really nice and kind man and believe me, there's a woman out there who will make you forget all this and will be glad to have you. I know you're in pain right now but that will fade and the worst thing you can do is keep the pain alive by anguishing over events over which you have no control. All the very best to you and good luck - you'll get through this, I promise.
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