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Not only that but women are not willing to offer even half of that but they do demand/expect it which can be quite hypocritical. It seems many women don’t grow out of that dream of being a princess since they were little girls. Seems like sweet sixteen or quinceañera is not enough. If you compare, weddings and sweet sixteens / quinceañeras are not THAT different.
You would be surprised to hear about the women who get disappointed because their ring was not as expensive as their girlfriends or the ones who go to jewelries to find out about its value or those who take their guy to the jewelry and pick their ring and hand the receipt to the guy.
You were going to buy your own ring or is that your husband’s ring you were going to buy? Still, I also rather spend the more than 20K in a down payment, vacations, another car if needed, home improvement, etc. Instead of a piece of metal on a finger that won’t do much.
The thing is that it is not about princesses affording it, it’s the guy who has to afford having a princess.
Or ask those who don’t have as big of a ring to show theirs and compare. I wonder the shocking look me and my girl would get when people saw that we couldn’t care less for following that tradition and both of us not have any ring to show off.
The thing is that she buys all those things and not make a man buy them and her thread is talking about the women who expect/demand a man to buy them their ring, spend all kinds of money on the wedding, etc. VanillaGorilla’s shopping is done by her, not a man.
Hey onihC, I see where you're coming from and it's obvious you're big on gender equality in its entirety.
However, If you really think men are the ones always putting in most of the work when it comes to relationships, then you clearly aren't looking at the holistic picture.
As for the OP's statements, I don't think it's that big a deal if "WE" can afford it.
Bridezillas that's what some of them are. And the mother of the bridezillas are worse. So demanding.
I've been saying this for years and it bears repeating again. If half the amount of energy and effort that goes into the wedding went into making the marriage successful, there would be a lot fewer divorces.
That's sooooo true. If I met someone worth marrying, I'd be happy about getting married in my backyard in a t-shirt and shorts. I don't need a huge fancy wedding. I despise those.
My wife and I were very young, she was 19 and I was 20 when we got married. I did not have much to offer financially. We simply went to the courthouse and got married. This was back in 1973. In 2003 we went to Las Vegas to re-new our vows. In 2008 I took her to the honeymoon we never had to Hawii, take care.
I hate big flashy weddings and big flashy engagement rings… and I am a woman!
Over the holiday period, a male co-worker got married and he said that his bride has only a wedding band, no engagement ring.
I asked another one of my female co-workers if she would be happy with this and she said “No way in hell!!! I want a big shiny diamond!!!”
I really really hate this attitude. Shouldn’t his love and commitment to her be enough?
I didn't have an engagement ring at all. And I only wear a simple narrow platinum wedding band, no stones.
I love diamonds but it really wasn't that important to me. He knows I really want one but the man was more important than a big diamond ring. If you can't afford it why go into serious debt?
My wife and I were very young, she was 19 and I was 20 when we got married. I did not have much to offer financially. We simply went to the courthouse and got married. This was back in 1973. In 2003 we went to Las Vegas to re-new our vows. In 2008 I took her to the honeymoon we never had to Hawii, take care.
Not only that but women are not willing to offer even half of that but they do demand/expect it which can be quite hypocritical.
Grooms are not expected/demanded to pay for weddings. That is traditionally handled by the bride/bride's family.
Quote:
The thing is that she buys all those things and not make a man buy them and her thread is talking about the women who expect/demand a man to buy them their ring, spend all kinds of money on the wedding, etc. VanillaGorilla’s shopping is done by her, not a man.
Well, it sounded like her friend was just expressing a fantasy (who wouldn't want a beautiful ring?) and Vanilla decided to pee in her cornflakes.
Well, it sounded like her friend was just expressing a fantasy (who wouldn't want a beautiful ring?) and Vanilla decided to pee in her cornflakes.
It isn’t a fantasy for her, it’s a necessity like it is for so many other women. No rock, no girl.
I think it should be about more than that. If you are going to get married it should be about you and the person you’re marrying, not about you having a bigger ring than your girlfriends or having the most spectacular wedding.
It shouldn’t be the “most special day of a girl’s life”… marriage involves two people. It’s about your union. Your commitment. Your coming together.
It just comes across as so superficial to me. A kind of “he’ll do” mentality.
I see your point. But I also applaud people who know what they want and who don't settle for less.
I don’t think it’s ok to end your relationship with someone that you claim to love, because they want to love and marry you... but won’t/can't buy you a diamond.
That’s just me.
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So demanding.
