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I'm kinda nervous to post this because I'm not one to be comfortable seeking out advice about such a delicate and vulnerable topic (though I've done it before, but it was scary then too!). That and I'm a very stoic person and I pride myself on facing my troubles gracefully (even with dating).
So putting my pride aside, with the title of the thread, I also just feel a little insecure that I'm stuck living at home for at least another 6 months, but with how school financial aide is going, its looking like it may be at least 10 more months at home . I really feel like its holding me back, but maybe its in my head.
I still do a lot, I'm a full time student for a couple more years, I'm involved with dancing and although I work very minimal hours. I am looking for more work as I can't stand having enough time to even so much as write this post, lol (had an interview this morning!) so its not like I'm bumming around mooching off my mother. I pay all of my bills on my own, just obviously don't have rent to pay right now (been back home for 2 years).
Either way, I took a break because I don't know what it is, but lately I just attract men that I don't find attractive and I feel shallow and mean for turning them down even if they're nice guys. Even with that, I don't have a history of dating the most attractive men, but they all had some kind of spark/charm that the men I turned down definitely lacked. So because I was having strange luck a few months ago, I decided to quit it, but I don't like it and I want to get back out there. I just know I need to do something different this time.
Anyways, I haven't been able to figure out how to change what I attract, but I'm tired of this break and I haven't had a relationship in almost two years and the last date I went on was in May (he was cute, but there was no chemistry). I'm definitely ready for a change. What's a girl to do?? Is it where I'm going? where do I go then? Could it be the friends I have (my friendship circle has been changing drastically)?
That and does it matter if someone is living at home due to finances being tough while that person is out there trying to better their future for the long run (school)? Beyond that, before anyone assumes anything, I don't need a relationship, but I would like one and I definitely feel ready to make things happen but something I was doing before just wasn't working, obviously.
Either way, I took a break because I don't know what it is, but lately I just attract men that I don't find attractive and I feel shallow and mean for turning them down even if they're nice guys. Even with that, I don't have a history of dating the most attractive men, but they all had some kind of spark/charm that the men I turned down definitely lacked. So because I was having strange luck a few months ago, I decided to quit it, but I don't like it and I want to get back out there. I just know I need to do something different this time.
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I suggest you become more proactive and start approaching guys you find attractive or charming.
Or
You can wait it out, and just maybe, your luck might change for the better.
That's funny, that's what I was going to ask her: Where are you?
But I'd just like to say that when we are too passive we get only what comes to us; that it's not good to force a square peg into a round hole, so to speak , but when we are just in a wait and see mode we are bound to take hits.
Mir, I think I'd advise you to take a more proactive approach without forcing anything.
That's funny, that's what I was going to ask her: Where are you?
But I'd just like to say that when we are too passive we get only what comes to us; that it's not good to force a square peg into a round hole, so to speak , but when we are just in a wait and see mode we are bound to take hits.
Mir, I think I'd advise you to take a more proactive approach without forcing anything.
i'm trying to teach my 25 y/o daughter this exact thing. i highly doubt she'll listen though.
But I'd just like to say that when we are too passive we get only what comes to us; that it's not good to force a square peg into a round hole, so to speak , but when we are just in a wait and see mode we are bound to take hits.
Oh, I agree, but I'm just familiar with the menu in general... It could be better in her age group, but the place is quite pathetic in this respect. I imported my last ex-husband from out of state...
i'm trying to teach my 25 y/o daughter this exact thing. i highly doubt she'll listen though.
Yeah, I looked at your profile to see your gender. It's hard for us guys to understand, because we in general don't let life come to us. I have a daughter and I am trying to teach her the same thing. She's still a teen and is proactive in her life, in music, school, social to a lesser extent; can't blame her for that; it sure makes a lot less sense. But some guys are like scavengers in this sense; and they are the lowest types. the types that when they sense a weakness they swoop in. To the OP, indecision and lack of a proactive approach leaves you vulnerable to these types. Figure out what kind of guy is best for you, if you would be right for the same type, where you are likely to find him, and then go there and be that until you make that connection. After the physical attraction is there it is easy.
Oh, I agree, but I'm just familiar with the menu in general... It could be better in her age group, but the place is quite pathetic in this respect. I imported my last ex-husband from out of state...
Yeah, Sierra, I've only driven through Arizona, and I'm sure there are state of the art people there, as there are everywhere in this GREAT GREAT LAND , but what are you doing there again?
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. I really feel like its holding me back, but maybe its in my head. 
, but when we are just in a wait and see mode we are bound to take hits. 
It could be better in her age group, but the place is quite pathetic in this respect. I imported my last ex-husband from out of state...
