Question to the ladies: What would you do if you fell in love with a guy WAY below your league? (married, woman)

[donie1]

My husband was WAY BELOW my league but I married him anyway. When you love someone, you love them for them and not for any materialistic reasons.

[donie1]

Originally Posted by stan4

I wouldn't fall in love with someone way below my league. It just wouldn't come up. Then again, I think the whole 'league' thing is b.s.

The dishwasher and I would have absolutely NOTHING substantial in common. And obviously not the same kind of goals. We'd come from two entirely different ways of thinking.

People don't fall in love with 'great personalities.' What makes someone's personality 'great' to me is our ability to connect on many common levels, issues, senses of humor. Not everyone even has the same opinion of what a 'great personality' is.

Money is not the issue...the same things that put you in the economic level in which you reside make you more likely to have other things in common. Similarly, however, I wouldn't like someone better just because they had money. Bunches and bunches of no class, uneducated morons have money.

If you take care of your body and have good hygiene, how ugly could you possibly really be?

Sure, a dishwasher and someone that has a higher level of a job could have something in common. Just because he's a dishwasher doesn't mean he's dumb, he could be in school.

A great personality is his sense of humor, qualities and character which is what people really do fall in love with. Personality is defined as great character and qualities.

[darrensmooth]

Originally Posted by stan4

The dishwasher and I would have absolutely NOTHING substantial in common. And obviously not the same kind of goals. We'd come from two entirely different ways of thinking.

How do you know, you would have nothing in common with the dishwasher?

[Ivorytickler]

Originally Posted by ItWasWritten

What would you do if you fell in love with a guy WAY below your league? I would also ask this to the fellas but I think its a way more complicated for a woman to make a choice. Would you pursue a relationship or ignore the feelings?

Question 1) What would you do if he was financially out of your league? For example you are a lawyer making good money and the guy you love washes dishes in a restaurant making like 17k a year.

Question 2) If he was status wise out of your league what would you do? For example you are a popular model looking woman and he is a geeky loser that all women find physically unattractive who is socially awkward but has a great personality that made you fall in love with him.

I would ignore the feelings in situation 1. In situation one, the relationship will not survive. It's unlikely you can even carry on a decent conversation with each other. Better to walk away before that one starts.

In situation two, I'd persue the relationship. I had one rule while dating. I only dated bald men. I found out that the pretty boy is often too into looks. Both his and mine. It is a fact that we grow old and lose our looks. I would think the unattractive geek would be less likely to place emphasis on looks and less likely to trade me in for a younger model years down the road.

[Ivorytickler]

Originally Posted by darrensmooth

How do you know, you would have nothing in common with the dishwasher?

Not the OP but it's because he's a dishwasher. If I've gone to law school and spent years building a career while he washed dishes, we'd have nothing in common. Our life goals would not be the same.

[noela]

Originally Posted by Ozgal

I've never listened to others.

If I like him, that's enough.

here

No-one will ever be allowed to interfere in my happiness!

[CarolVa1977]

Originally Posted by stan4

I wouldn't fall in love with someone way below my league. It just wouldn't come up. Then again, I think the whole 'league' thing is b.s.

The dishwasher and I would have absolutely NOTHING substantial in common. And obviously not the same kind of goals. We'd come from two entirely different ways of thinking.

People don't fall in love with 'great personalities.' What makes someone's personality 'great' to me is our ability to connect on many common levels, issues, senses of humor. Not everyone even has the same opinion of what a 'great personality' is.

Money is not the issue...the same things that put you in the economic level in which you reside make you more likely to have other things in common. Similarly, however, I wouldn't like someone better just because they had money. Bunches and bunches of no class, uneducated morons have money.

If you take care of your body and have good hygiene, how ugly could you possibly really be?

Agree 100% with this post

I also believe the league thing is such BS

[pkrplr1]

Originally Posted by ItWasWritten

What would you do if you fell in love with a guy WAY below your league? I would also ask this to the fellas but I think its a way more complicated for a woman to make a choice. Would you pursue a relationship or ignore the feelings?

Question 1) What would you do if he was financially out of your league? For example you are a lawyer making good money and the guy you love washes dishes in a restaurant making like 17k a year.

Question 2) If he was status wise out of your league what would you do? For example you are a popular model looking woman and he is a geeky loser that all women find physically unattractive who is socially awkward but has a great personality that made you fall in love with him.

Of course there are exceptions to everything. But there's a reason the leagues were created and we're supposed to play in our own league. Things are less complicated that way and tend to work out better.
I know now that I'm getting older I'm not in the majors anymore so I didn't go after a smoking hot 29 year old, I went after and married a smoking hot 41 year old. We're both 49 this year.

If I had played out of my league I wouldn't be able to keep up at this point in the relationship and she'd be very unhappy which in turn would make me unhappy. There's leagues for a reason and we should play in the one we've been assigned to. On the other hand if I had played out of my league by going down to double A ball I'd be kicking myself in the pants right now as i watch my beautiful wife walk pass on someone else's arm.

[himain]

The funny thing is I've had both-Very, very weathly ex and extremely model looking guy...Both ended up being dirtbags so if I found someone whos good looking but doesn't make the money I do but treats me like a princess, etc, then who the F cares???

However, there has to be some kind of physical attraction there for the record...

[JoshM25]

I think the people who like to talk about leagues are the very same people who complain how hard it is to find someone.

Give me a break. If you like someone, who cares? You're just setting yourself up for failure if you view relationships so narrowly.