Alone too long=Lifelong singlehood?

[latetotheparty]

Originally Posted by carra

Well to be fair, it IS obviously inferior. Mostly anyone who has ever been in a good relationship will tell you this: in a (healthy) relationship you can have emotional and personal experiences that you can never reach alone, no matter how close you are to friends or family.

Now, considering it "shameful" is another completely different (and unhealthy) thing.

wow..... being alone is INFERIOR to being in a relationship?? how do you figure??

i have been in good, long term relationships and am currently alone.... and plan to remain that way.... i am quite content with myself, my pets and my friends and feel no need to pursue another relationship.....

[carra]

No offense latetotheparty, but are you sure your relationships were actually good? If you were no happier with your partners than you are alone, then why did you stay with them? I guess they must have given you something you could not have alone at some point... When most people would prefer being in a relationship, it's for a reason.

[TaoistDude]

Originally Posted by carra

No offense latetotheparty, but are you sure your relationships were actually good? If you were no happier with your partners than you are alone, then why did you stay with them? I guess they must have given you something you could not have alone at some point... When most people would prefer being in a relationship, it's for a reason.

The key is in what you said - most people would prefer being in a relationship. Some do not, some are no happier. Yes, a great relationship is wonderful, but no matter how good, it's not always better for everyone. Some people are indeed happier alone, or have experienced happines both in relationships and alone. They are different, but one is not necessarily better than the other. If being in one was so much better, then every single person would be actively seeking one. It seems that many are not.

[carra]

You do have a point TaoistDude. I guess we are always making the same mistake: trying to convince other people that what works for oneself will work for everybody else.