U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 03-08-2011, 04:30 PM
 
213 posts, read 412,632 times
Reputation: 170
Default Are relationships complicated or do we make them complicated

meaning, you would think it should be simple, God put this Mod cut: half/soul mate in place on this earth for you to be with so then why is the process so dang complicated.
Do we make it complicated because;
we don't wait long enough, fall in love with the wrong people, live in the wrong part of the world, marry the wrong people, never were meant to be married, are so shattered by being with the wrong person that when the right one comes along we totally miss the person, know the person is there but is just not attracted to him or her. Don't pray hard enough to find the person, they die prematurely before we get to meet them. We are only meant to find them at a certain time and spend only a limited amount of time with them.
I'm just trying to find a meaning to all this.

Last edited by yankeegirl313; 03-10-2011 at 05:34 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 03-08-2011, 04:34 PM
 
Location: ATL with a side of Chicago
3,625 posts, read 2,617,668 times
Reputation: 3812
Quote:
Originally Posted by sincere1782 View Post
meaning, you would think it should be simple, God put Mod cut: half/soul mate in place on this earth for you to be with so then why is the process so dang complicated.
Do we make it complicated because;
we don't wait long enough, fall in love with the wrong people, live in the wrong part of the world, marry the wrong people, never were meant to be married, are so shattered by being with the wrong person that when the right one comes along we totally miss the person, know the person is there but is just not attracted to him or her. Don't pray hard enough to find the person, they die prematurely before we get to meet them. We are only meant to find them at a certain time and spend only a limited amount of time with them.
I'm just trying to find a meaning to all this.
IMHO, the idea of a "soulmate" is an illusion. There is more than one person for everyone, and getting hung up on a single person because you feel he/she is a "soulmate" is going to lead to heartbreak and complications.

Last edited by yankeegirl313; 03-10-2011 at 05:34 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-08-2011, 04:39 PM
 
343 posts, read 244,175 times
Reputation: 596
We, as individuals are complicated. Life brings a whole other set of complications.

So when two complicated people with complicated lives get together....it's not easy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-08-2011, 11:20 PM
 
3,409 posts, read 1,986,311 times
Reputation: 1374
Quote:
Originally Posted by sincere1782 View Post
meaning, you would think it should be simple, God put this Mod cut: half/soul mate in place on this earth for you to be with so then why is the process so dang complicated.
Do we make it complicated because;
we don't wait long enough, fall in love with the wrong people, live in the wrong part of the world, marry the wrong people, never were meant to be married, are so shattered by being with the wrong person that when the right one comes along we totally miss the person, know the person is there but is just not attracted to him or her. Don't pray hard enough to find the person, they die prematurely before we get to meet them. We are only meant to find them at a certain time and spend only a limited amount of time with them.
I'm just trying to find a meaning to all this.
My dream is to set the hook in a soul mate/person for me. Once I do, that gal will know it and will remember it everyday for the rest of her life. I can't go out without finding and experiencing that. I may die off before I get her to say yes but at least I tried.

Last edited by yankeegirl313; 03-10-2011 at 05:34 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-08-2011, 11:35 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles
754 posts, read 888,062 times
Reputation: 683
I think a person can have more than one soul mate. I heard once that relationships can be seasonal (not calendar seasons but periods of time in your life), so for that moment in time, that person is perfect for you but people change and it's time to find the person who will complement who you are now. But you will always remember them, they will always be special to you.

I think relationships are complicated because of life itself, face it we all come into relationships with our issues. They in a sense become who we are, but once you're in a relationship you have the other person to tell you what your issues are and it's up to you to change them. Sounds simple but it's not an easy thing to do and the process of realizing lifelong behaviors and changing them is challenging. However, once the two of you beat the issues out of each other and accept the things that you can not change, it gets easier. At least that's what I've heard LOL.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2011, 09:24 AM
 
9,712 posts, read 5,893,796 times
Reputation: 9728
I think that relationships are complicated because we put too much emphasis on them...they are not the all of life, they are more the icing on the cake(so to speak). If we think highly of ourselves, and pursue life with zest and a purpose, life can be very rewarding ,even without that SO that everyone so desires.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2011, 10:06 AM
 
Location: Wu Dang Mountain
12,890 posts, read 11,866,164 times
Reputation: 8389
Sometimes I think we get distracted by the pretty shinies in the hunt for a significant other; we get caught up in appearances and attitudes and day-to-day bothers like making a living and putting food on the table. Add in the constant barrage of media telling us what we should be looking for in someone and you have a cluster-muck the likes of which even the Creator cannot undo.

Humans like to make things difficult - we're a race of drama queens.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2011, 10:23 AM
 
24,143 posts, read 24,513,071 times
Reputation: 31825
Relationships get bolloxed up when one or both persons put their own needs above that of the relationship itself.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2011, 10:24 AM
 
2,608 posts, read 2,581,307 times
Reputation: 2009
I think we make it over complicated, and I blame modern technology's influence on society as the cause of the problem.

The reason being is that everyone, myself included, wants the quick answer to everything. Information and contact to one another is so easily available through the internet, email, and cell phones. Instead of just going with the dating scenario step by step to see where it leads, we're all fast forwarding to figure out exactly what the end result will be. We're always trying to figure out the other person and determine if this is the one we're going to marry.

Expecations are also very high and because of the easy access to new people through technology, it's much easier to pass on one candidate knowing it's very easy to meet another. Options are unlimited. I think a lot of people are so focused on perfection and what the next person can bring them without taking a good look what they have in front of them.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-10-2011, 05:24 PM
 
8,681 posts, read 6,945,013 times
Reputation: 14874
If there was only one person on this earth for me, with my luck, he'd be in Uzbekistan.

Relationships are what you make of them. There are certain things that I feel must be in place for my own to be successful (common interests and beliefs, trust, communication, respect, good nookie), but the small stuff is all negotiable. That's what usually complicates matters--when people sweat the small stuff.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $79,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top