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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:20 AM
 
1,092 posts, read 720,701 times
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Default women and comparison

Anybody else feel like women are uneccessarily put up against each other when they are in public? like she's hotter than the other one, or labelling "the pretty one".

It frustrates me sometimes. But I guess first impressions are first impressions (can't be avoided) and eventually personality is what shows.

But no one seems to do this comparison thing in a group of guys. It seems more chill. Is it women themselves perpetuating the trend?

Guys - when you look at a group of girls, do you compare? Women, do you?
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:24 AM
 
Location: NH
110 posts, read 104,454 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sydney1987 View Post
Anybody else feel like women are uneccessarily put up against each other when they are in public? like she's hotter than the other one, or labelling "the pretty one".

It frustrates me sometimes. But I guess first impressions are first impressions (can't be avoided) and eventually personality is what shows.

But no one seems to do this comparison thing in a group of guys. It seems more chill. Is it women themselves perpetuating the trend?

Guys - when you look at a group of girls, do you compare? Women, do you?

Girls will be girls. They are much more competitive when it comes to love an relationships than guys are.
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:24 AM
 
1,646 posts, read 1,105,057 times
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Insecurity?
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:30 AM
 
3,409 posts, read 1,855,570 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sydney1987 View Post
Anybody else feel like women are uneccessarily put up against each other when they are in public? like she's hotter than the other one, or labelling "the pretty one".

It frustrates me sometimes. But I guess first impressions are first impressions (can't be avoided) and eventually personality is what shows.

But no one seems to do this comparison thing in a group of guys. It seems more chill. Is it women themselves perpetuating the trend?

Guys - when you look at a group of girls, do you compare? Women, do you?
Guys don't normally do that with each other. We may make some belly smackers, but it's all in good fun. Example 1.... hey man your balls are hanging out of those shorts! What?? LMAO I think women compare each other all the time. Some are just flat out rude! If you want to see mud and hair flying, put twenty women together without a man present to BALANCE the group!
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:30 AM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 8,918,048 times
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I will be the first to admit that women certainly are very competitive when it comes to looks, clothes and external qualities in general. I would be a liar if I denied seeing this trend.

I think it's pretty much normality in OUR society. However, for some women it's so important, it becomes unhealthy. I think insecurity comes to play here.
I remember hanging out with some of my male friends and I would see them talk about a group of women and clearly saying things like: "no, the one to the right is the hottest..." or "that one has the widest hips". Women are very aware that men do that and it becomes a struggle for them to stand out, look better.
I think it's very sad however, when a woman is so preoccupied with her external qualities, that her internal peace becomes completely disturbed. I do wish for our society to be less superficial, to concentrate more on spiritual and internal beauty. It's not going to happen, at least not in my lifetime.

There is a different type of competition going on with men. They are more competitive about the level of success, the amount of money they make. And yes, some men are competitive about the looks too, who's got the bigger muscles for example.
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:31 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
11,898 posts, read 8,636,251 times
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This is one of my favorite quotes from a book by the author of Bridget Jones. (I know, I know.)

Quote:
"Olivia’s theory was that you could divide women into two types: those who were on the Girls’ Team, and Undercover *******. If a woman was on the Girls’ Team, she could be as beautiful, intelligent, rich, famous, sexy, successful and as popular as ****, and you’d still like her. Women on the Girls’ Team had solidarity. They were conspiratorial and brought all their ****-ups to the table for everyone to enjoy. Undercover ******* were competitive: they showed off, tried to put others down to make themselves look good, lacked humour and a sense of their own ridiculousness, said things which sounded okay on the surface but were actually designed to make you feel really bad, couldn’t bear it when they weren’t getting enough attention, and they flicked their hair. Men didn’t get all this. They thought women took against each other because they were jealous. Quite tragic, really."
I try my best to be on the Girls' Team. Other women aren't my enemy, and I'm suspicious of women who say that they can't be friends with other women because of petty reasons. IMO, that's more indicative of the speaker's insecurity than anything.
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:35 AM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 8,918,048 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
This is one of my favorite quotes from a book by the author of Bridget Jones. (I know, I know.)



I try my best to be on the Girls' Team. Other women aren't my enemy, and I'm suspicious of women who say that they can't be friends with other women because of petty reasons. IMO, that's more indicative of the speaker's insecurity than anything.
I enjoyed reading this quote. I truly hope that I'm the Girls' Team. I've never had problems being friends with women.
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:47 AM
 
16,208 posts, read 12,076,059 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
This is one of my favorite quotes from a book by the author of Bridget Jones. (I know, I know.)



I try my best to be on the Girls' Team. Other women aren't my enemy, and I'm suspicious of women who say that they can't be friends with other women because of petty reasons. IMO, that's more indicative of the speaker's insecurity than anything.
i like that quote

although, i do think men get it, although probably not on the scale that women do.
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:52 AM
 
3,409 posts, read 1,855,570 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by le roi View Post
i like that quote

and strictly speaking, it's not true that men 'Don't get' this, although i certainly agree that we are less likely to notice, and perhaps more concerned with how women treat us, than how they treat one another.
I'll razz you about being a better shot or catching more fish, but I don't attack your character or pick out your physical flaws. I tend to hang with guys for what they CAN do and their specialized skills and talents. Looks don't mean squat when it comes to that. Isn't that right music man?
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Unread 03-24-2011, 09:56 AM
 
Location: state of procrastination
3,460 posts, read 3,113,900 times
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I think when I'm around a bunch of guys, the conversation more often turns to girls and how hot or not they are... with the caveat that they aren't allowed to judge me, LOL.

When I'm around girls I don't think we talk about that kind of stuff because we are too polite. Mostly it's about how cute the clothes or styles are. Which I don't really like talking about that much, but it helps for fitting in.
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