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Old 07-28-2007, 04:58 AM
Location: VA
784 posts, read 4,144,476 times
Reputation: 1069


My wife and I are part of the new trend of men and women sleeping in separate beds and rooms. I read somewhere that in an increasing number of marriages the couples are moving towards the peace and quiet of having their own bedrooms. I like it but am tired of people harassing us about it.

Much of the reason we sleep in separate rooms is insomnia. Neither of us sleep all that well and spend alot of time getting up and down, in and out of bed. Both of us also snore and would wake each other up if we were able to fall sleep. Regardless I like the privacy and time alone from my spouse.

If you look at American history, couples have only slept together in the same bed for the last 50 years. Before that they were in separate beds or rooms.

Have you read about all the couples who finally admit that they are sleeping apart because they love each other not because they had a fight?
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Old 07-28-2007, 07:25 AM
Location: Under the SUNNY WARM SUN ....
14,939 posts, read 9,816,292 times
Reputation: 17502
I agree with you Dingler. I have been sleeping alone (on my side) for about 4-5 years now. I love it! I wouldn't ever go back to sharing a bed with anyone. It has nothing to do with romantic nights. It might be more fun to change places every once in awhile to spice things up.

But my case is different - with my hearing loss, the vibrations are unbearable. Snoring is louder to me than my vibrating alarm clock. The bump on the bed leg will wake me up. Any movement in the bed feels like a waterbed moving. I'm very senstitive to vibration and movement. Since I've been sleeping alone, I sleep much better and feel better.
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Old 07-28-2007, 08:35 AM
2,833 posts, read 9,432,555 times
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I would love my own room, something like the insdie of the 'I Dream of Jeannie' bottle....
Anyway...I kinda have my own room, my hubbie gets up at 11 and I go to bed at 11:30. I hog the whole bed! I love it!

Dingler....did you see the episode of King of Queens where they have separate beds and love it but make all kinds of excuses about it because they didn't think it was right to love it?
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Old 07-28-2007, 08:47 AM
Location: California
64,058 posts, read 15,714,801 times
Reputation: 39753
Everyone has their own sleeping patterns,according to the ying and the yang map,some people sleep according to how the sun rises,some sleep better facing south,north. Looking at the chart, I always wondered about how would two people sleep in the same room according to the chart?

a male born 1983 he would face N.E. same year for a woman faces west

Good news for 1988! for both men and women face east at the same time!

Last edited by VillageLife; 07-28-2007 at 09:03 AM..
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Old 07-28-2007, 09:15 AM
Location: Mississauga, Canada
131 posts, read 339,121 times
Reputation: 75
My parents sleep in the same room but not on the same bed. They have 2 beds inside their room, one for mom and one for dad. If it will make your relationship better by sleeping in different rooms and bed why not hehe
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Old 07-28-2007, 10:01 AM
Location: Newtown Connecticut
328 posts, read 918,415 times
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Default A Good Nights Sleep.................

There is nothing like a good nights sleep. Everyone has their preference on whether to sleep with or to sleep alone. My wife and I enjoy sleeping together
It seems to work for us..We rest comfortably. A King sized bed helps too. Even room for the dog It depends on the individuals. In another relationship in another time sleeping together was the least favorable option. Sleep was disrupted. Both parties were guilty of crimes against sleep ( Unforgivable)... Restless legs, snoring, talking in their sleep. Woke up cranky...took frequent naps...at work too....... not
So lucky to have a partner now with whom sleeping is pleasure.
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Old 07-28-2007, 10:02 AM
Location: Sherman Oaks, CA
6,173 posts, read 14,642,302 times
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I preferred having a separate bedroom when I was married, because his snoring could rattle the windows! I do think that sharing a bedroom and hopefully, a bed, promotes intimacy (like waking up in the morning and things just sort of "happen" in that half-dreaming, half-awake state...). However, in my situation I'd only be cranky and have a nasty headache from the lack of sleep! So it depends on everyone's individual wants and needs.
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Old 07-28-2007, 01:31 PM
Location: Sebastian/ FL
3,496 posts, read 8,436,390 times
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Since we moved, we have found ourselves sleeping in two different beds.
It works for us, and we enjoy it. His snoring just keeps me awake, and plus, "his" side of the bed is usually taken by the dogs...LOL.
So, instead of fighting with them to get them to move, he just goes into the guestroom down the hall...there's another king size bed.
We don't care on where we sleep in the house...as long as it is comfortable for both of us.
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Old 07-28-2007, 01:36 PM
3,853 posts, read 9,618,699 times
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We are right there with you.

DH tosses and turns in his sleep and jolts the bed so hard I wake up and can't get back to sleep.

He says I snore. I don't think I do

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Old 07-28-2007, 05:15 PM
Location: Home is where we park it.
3,091 posts, read 8,068,468 times
Reputation: 3126
For those of you who snore (or your spouse says you do) or your spouse snores...get checked for sleep apnea.

Sleep apnea is a common disorder that can be very serious. In sleep apnea, your breathing stops or gets very shallow while you are sleeping. Each pause in breathing typically lasts 10 to 20 seconds or more. These pauses can occur 20 to 30 times or more an hour.

The most common type of sleep apnea is obstructive sleep apnea. During sleep, enough air cannot flow into your lungs through your mouth and nose even though you try to breathe. When this happens, the amount of oxygen in your blood may drop. Normal breaths then start again with a loud snort or choking sound.

When your sleep is upset throughout the night, you can be very sleepy during the day. With sleep apnea, your sleep is not restful because:

* These brief episodes of increased airway resistance (and breathing pauses) occur many times.
* You may have many brief drops in the oxygen levels in your blood.
* You move out of deep sleep and into light sleep several times during the night, resulting in poor sleep quality.

People with sleep apnea often have loud snoring. However, not everyone who snores has sleep apnea. Some people with sleep apnea donít know they snore.

* Sleep apnea happens more often in people who are overweight, but even thin people can have it.
* Most people donít know they have sleep apnea. They donít know that they are having problems breathing while they are sleeping.
* A family member and/or bed partner may notice the signs of sleep apnea first.

Untreated sleep apnea can increase the chance of having high blood pressure and even a heart attack or stroke. Untreated sleep apnea can also increase the risk of diabetes and the risk for work-related accidents and driving accidents.
Both my husband and I have sleep apnea. I had the surgery called a UPPP that cured me. My husband uses a CPAP machine. After my surgery my surgeon asked if I was sleeping better. I told him no cause my HUSBAND was still keeping me awake. Once my husband was treated we BOTH slept better, MUCH better.

Before we were both treated, there were far too many nights when I did sleep in a separate room due to his snoring (he always fell asleep first). Now we just use a king size bed...need the extra real estate with 5 kitties. Liz
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