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Old 04-05-2011, 06:49 AM
 
Location: New Zealand and Australia
7,246 posts, read 6,561,629 times
Reputation: 7479

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Quote:
Originally Posted by df175 View Post
I'm in my early 40s and I've realized in the last 2-3 years just how uninterested I am in single women around my age. There are always exceptions, but it's rare. I mostly find women around 5-10 years younger attractive, holding most other factors equal.

Recently I was put in kind of an awkward situation where a woman with whom I was socially acquainted put me on the spot. In many objective ways we were compatible but the chemistry just wasn't there on my part. To be clear, I never led her on.

The long and the short of it was that she dumped on me with an accusative tone about "age-ism" and about how hard it's been for her to get dates, almost pleading for some kind of sympathy or justification. It was hard for me to deny, but what can I do?

I don't think my feelings make me a bad person. I mean, if the mojo is not there, it's just not there. I cannot rationalize away my gut reactions.

Many women seems to put a lot of stock in youthful looks and even if they are accomplished in other ways, it seems a deep blow for them to lose them, to lose the attention of men that comes automatically and in abundance.

Few men are rarely so handsome as to attract women based on mostly looks (including myself!), so I think that women should understand that it's hard to be genuinely sympathetic. Intellectually I can see from where aging women are coming, but not at a visceral level.
I find that hard to believe. My guess is you have come to that assumption because of too small of a core sample.

 
Old 04-05-2011, 08:12 AM
 
2,990 posts, read 2,468,685 times
Reputation: 3153
Quote:
Originally Posted by laorbust61 View Post
Western society practically deifies the young.
Which western society?

Surely Europe is considered western society? Yet, unlike America, older women are considered super sexy there.

America is well known to be the country that is obsessed with youth. The French think we are very odd in that regard.

Go to Paris and you will see lots of middle-aged ladies buying beautiful lingerie in the shops. It's a different culture.
 
Old 04-05-2011, 08:37 AM
 
Location: Nevernever land
2,671 posts, read 2,170,580 times
Reputation: 4469
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shooting Stars View Post
Which western society?

Surely Europe is considered western society? Yet, unlike America, older women are considered super sexy there.

America is well known to be the country that is obsessed with youth. The French think we are very odd in that regard.

Go to Paris and you will see lots of middle-aged ladies buying beautiful lingerie in the shops. It's a different culture.

That's what I was thinking. I don't get where the op is coming from. Older women have so many good qualties, besides being sexy and confident. I actually can't stand young girls. They reek with similarities. They all copy each other, ex) ugg boots, North face jacket, etc, etc. They just seem confused. They follow idiots like Paris, Lindsey, and Kim K. What older women in their right mind would want to be like these nit wits? They just have so many more things going on for them. I don't mean to generalize all young women, because surely that is not fair and is not true for all. However, the majority of them are and I'll use a term from my psych. proffesor years ago. They are moo moo's. Meaning cows in a field. All doing the same thing. All wearing the same fads. All acting the same stupid way. I find the maturity of older women sexy. Chicken heads suck.

Older women exude confidence. Real confidence. Not look at what designer jeans I'm wearing confidence. The kind of confidence that only comes with being wise and age. Something you cannot get from being young. They've been there and they've done that and now they are who they are. They don't follow trends, fads, and they know exactly who they are and what they want. They've been around long enough to know these things. It is hard for young girls to have these attributes because to have these attributes you must experience life. There is only so much experiencing a twenty year old can have.

I don't get the look thing either. It must be the times, or my own age. But I've seen more good looking women in their forties than ever before. To say that women are not good looking after a certain age is rediculous. Everyone is different. Some in their forties will look better than others in their forties. Just as some in their twenties will look better than those in their twenties. Such is life.
 
Old 04-05-2011, 09:01 AM
 
Location: Where Dance Music comes first
1,863 posts, read 1,443,607 times
Reputation: 2154
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
That's what I was thinking. I don't get where the op is coming from. Older women have so many good qualties, besides being sexy and confident. I actually can't stand young girls. They reek with similarities. They all copy each other, ex) ugg boots, North face jacket, etc, etc. They just seem confused. They follow idiots like Paris, Lindsey, and Kim K. What older women in their right mind would want to be like these nit wits. They just have so many more things going on for them. I don't mean to generalize all young women, because surely that is not fair and is not true for all. However, the majority of them are and I'll use a term from my psych. proffesor years ago. They are moo moo's. Meaning cows in a field. All doing the same thing. All wearing the same fads. All acting the same stupid way. I find the maturity of older women sexy. Chicken heads suck.

Older women exude confidence. Real confidence. Not look at what designer jeans I'm wearing confidence. The kind of confidence that only comes with being wise and age. Something you cannot get from being young. They've been there and they've done that and now they are who they are. They don't follow trends, fads, and they know exactly who they are and what they want. They've been around long enough to know these things. It is hard for young girls to have these attributes because to have these attributes you must experience life. There is only so much experiencing a twenty year old can have.

I don't get the look thing either. It must be the times, or my own age. But I've seen more good looking women in their forties than ever before. To say that women are not good looking after a certain age is rediculous. Everyone is different. Some in their forties will look better than others in their forties. Just as some in their twenties will look better than those in their twenties. Such is life.

Just as ridiculous as making condescending generalizations about younger women. You're doing the exact same thing OP did.

And yes, I noticed you mentioned there are exceptions, but so did OP.

As for your comment about North Face jackets. They're actually pretty damn good jackets. Unfortunately, some people will never wear one simply because everybody else does. Those are the worst kind of people in my opiniion.

Last edited by Raging-Hetero; 04-05-2011 at 09:10 AM..
 
Old 04-05-2011, 09:08 AM
 
Location: Nevernever land
2,671 posts, read 2,170,580 times
Reputation: 4469
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raging-Hetero View Post
Just as ridiculous as making condescending generalizations about younger women. You're doing the exact same thing OP did.

And yes, I noticed you mentioned there are exceptions, but so did OP.

As for your comment about North Face jackets. They're actually pretty damn good jackets. Unfortunately, some people that will never wear one simply because everybody else does. Those are the worst kind of people in my opinion.

Unfortunately it is true. Sometimes we don't always like to say the truth because it is generalizing. Where truth and opinion mix, there is no denying the similarities today with young people. I guess it's ok to generalize older people but don't dare do that with younger ones. Because their special. I also said most and as you have stated that there are excepetions. But the majority are like that. I know, because I can see and I have seen. Plus, being in college almost as long as a doctor (no, I'm not a doctor), I have seen it over and over as every incoming freshman, sophmore, junior, senior class has presented itself. Unfortunately, since about the time of Maddonna, uniqueness is not conforming. Unigueness is not celebrated or cherished by youth. Unfortunately with our youth today, likeness is in. I know that I am using a sample size as my basis. But beyond the time I have spent in college. I am still alive. I still go to the grocery store, mall, movies, etc. I think you get the point. You can't deny everyday exstence. It is what it is.

I have nothing against what the op said. Some of what I addressed was towards the guy who said all women lose their looks after 25. That was just insane. The op' I actually defended. I said that was his prefference. But when someone starts using absolutes such as the guy I just mentioned, that's being ignorant. No one can say all or make blanket statements such as that. If you read my post, I left room for exceptions. Because there are exceptions to everything. To think that all young girls act this way would be just as ignorant. However, "many" do act that way, and for that I will stand by what I have said.

Last edited by supermanpansy; 04-05-2011 at 09:28 AM..
 
Old 04-05-2011, 09:54 AM
 
Location: Where Dance Music comes first
1,863 posts, read 1,443,607 times
Reputation: 2154
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
Unfortunately it is true. Sometimes we don't always like to say the truth because it is generalizing. Where truth and opinion mix, there is no denying the similarities today with young people. I guess it's ok to generalize older people but don't dare do that with younger ones. Because their special.
No, it's quite the opposite. All I see is young people getting ripped apart. We must be filtering the N/As.

Quote:
I also said most and as you have stated that there are excepetions. But the majority are like that. I know, because I can see and I have seen. Plus, being in college almost as long as a doctor (no, I'm not a doctor), I have seen it over and over as every incoming freshman, sophmore, junior, senior class has presented itself.
So can I, and I believe you're wrong. Conformity or Non-conformity in fashion is something I honestly do not care about. It makes no difference if a group of friends wear or do not wear the exact same clothes/styles. Well, to me it doesn't.

The uniqueness that matters is in the mentality that's mutually exclusive to fashion/dressin styles. This I see a lot of.

Quote:
Unfortunately, since about the time of Maddonna, uniqueness is not conforming. Unigueness is not celebrated or cherished by youth. Unfortunately with our youth today, likeness is in. .
I appreciate natural occuring uniqueness just as much as I appreciate being typical. Like I said, the worst kind of failures are people who force their non-conformity simply in the name of being unique. Just sad.
 
Old 04-05-2011, 11:35 AM
 
1,177 posts, read 1,194,743 times
Reputation: 1030
Default funny

correct me if i'm wrong but the OP never did post again on this thread?

also halfway through i realized just how many georgeous people we have on CD. my oh my, getting carded at the age of 50? no makeup, no botox, no nothing!!! wow beautiful!!!! so many people preening online trying to impress other people they don't know and will never see. very, very funny to me. i'm 74 years old and i got carded the other night. after i got my booze i went and scored my viagra and banged my 20 year old GF all night long. of course i'm a perfect specimen for my age, you should see my face, no line, no wrinkles and i've still got my six pack abs.
 
Old 04-05-2011, 11:52 AM
 
Location: Not Nowhere
1,321 posts, read 1,034,268 times
Reputation: 1704
Quote:
Originally Posted by pkrplr1 View Post
correct me if i'm wrong but the OP never did post again on this thread?

also halfway through i realized just how many georgeous people we have on CD. my oh my, getting carded at the age of 50? no makeup, no botox, no nothing!!! wow beautiful!!!! so many people preening online trying to impress other people they don't know and will never see. very, very funny to me. i'm 74 years old and i got carded the other night. after i got my booze i went and scored my viagra and banged my 20 year old GF all night long. of course i'm a perfect specimen for my age, you should see my face, no line, no wrinkles and i've still got my six pack abs.
Dad!?!

When did you learn the internets?
 
Old 04-05-2011, 01:29 PM
 
1,475 posts, read 1,267,712 times
Reputation: 645
Quote:
Originally Posted by df175 View Post
The long and the short of it was that she dumped on me with an accusative tone about "age-ism" and about how hard it's been for her to get dates, almost pleading for some kind of sympathy or justification. It was hard for me to deny, but what can I do?
Do nothing. You have a right to date the age group you choose.

Actually, you probably aren't choosing women based on age or looks. You probably are basing your choices on how they behave. And if accusing you of "age-ism" is how they behave then you're probably going after women that don't behave that way. And just by coincidence they are (or you percieve them to be) less than 40 years old.
 
Old 04-05-2011, 02:10 PM
 
1,177 posts, read 1,194,743 times
Reputation: 1030
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Vanderburgh View Post
Dad!?!

When did you learn the internets?
hey sonny! long time no see
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