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Old 04-26-2011, 08:15 PM
 
946 posts, read 2,319,217 times
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I've been on dates with a few guys and when the time comes to reject them or tell them I feel there's no connection or compatability, they don't take it very well at all. Some have turned to insults, others have told me I didn't give them a chance to let them show their real selves, and others just won't accept it. I have always been honest with them so I don't think I deserve being insulted...I never lead people on, it's just simply that there's no chemistry and that's it. The latest one had me laughing quite a bit. He seemed normal, albeit maybe a bit strange and mysterious, but when I told him I couldn't continue seeing him and gave him my reason, he went on about how he was a highly successful and respectable person in "x" field and had several connections in that same field and that I missed out on a golden chance to be with a very wealthy person, etc. I had to laugh at that. Why can't people just accept defeat and humbly move on? What happened to having some self-respect?
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:19 PM
 
17,868 posts, read 16,481,763 times
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Typically I tell them "enjoy your evening." or say it was a pleasure talking with them.

After facing so many rejections recently though, I just stopped trying.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:21 PM
 
12,673 posts, read 20,026,481 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lilamx View Post
I've been on dates with a few guys and when the time comes to reject them or tell them I feel there's no connection or compatability, they don't take it very well at all. Some have turned to insults, others have told me I didn't give them a chance to let them show their real selves, and others just won't accept it. I have always been honest with them so I don't think I deserve being insulted...I never lead people on, it's just simply that there's no chemistry and that's it. The latest one had me laughing quite a bit. He seemed normal, albeit maybe a bit strange and mysterious, but when I told him I couldn't continue seeing him and gave him my reason, he went on about how he was a highly successful and respectable person in "x" field and had several connections in that same field and that I missed out on a golden chance to be with a very wealthy person, etc. I had to laugh at that. Why can't people just accept defeat and humbly move on? What happened to having some self-respect?
Same thing as getting rejected for a job offer. No big deal. Move on. I find it exciting.

The thing is I can't change her mind to like me but like the fact that she is honest with me. I rather have her reject me now then later.

What do you describe as leading someone on? Money alone is not going to change that chemistry and keep you happy emotionally when both of you are old.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:23 PM
 
12,673 posts, read 20,026,481 times
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Originally Posted by Prince_Frog View Post
Typically I tell them "enjoy your evening." or say it was a pleasure talking with them.

After facing so many rejections recently though, I just stopped trying.
Why stop? You still have to get that sale.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:24 PM
 
946 posts, read 2,319,217 times
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Originally Posted by Texas User View Post
Same thing as getting rejected for a job offer. No big deal. Move on. I find it exciting.

The thing is I can't change her mind to like me but like the fact that she is honest with me. I rather have her reject me now then later.

What do you describe as leading someone on? Money alone is not going to change that chemistry and keep you happy emotionally when both of you are old.
Leading someone on is making them believe you like them and would like to pursue a relationship or continue seeing them. I've always been honest.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:25 PM
 
17,868 posts, read 16,481,763 times
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Originally Posted by Texas User View Post
Why stop? You still have to get that sale.
because I felt like taking a break after god knows how many rejections.

And many "you're a little short for me" snags.

I'll bide my time. Besides, I'm too busy saving lives at the moment to worry about dates apparently.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:26 PM
 
Location: SELA
532 posts, read 847,616 times
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Come back with politely phrased reasons for rejecting them, so that it seems like a mutual process, even if it isn't.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:29 PM
 
Location: Not Nowhere
1,321 posts, read 1,685,911 times
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What's rejection?

Wait a minute, let me go Google it.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:30 PM
 
Location: Hollywood, CA
1,449 posts, read 1,550,635 times
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I usually talk on the phone a few times to see if we have similar ideals and things in common. If we don't then I won't call again. In my experience, it allows the first date or meeting to go a lot better because we have an understanding about one another. We aren't sitting there nervous, trying to say the right things or worried about what the other person thinks. We can be relax and know this person likes me, I like them, we are just getting comfortable with each other.
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Old 04-26-2011, 08:31 PM
 
12,673 posts, read 20,026,481 times
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Originally Posted by lilamx View Post
Leading someone on is making them believe you like them and would like to pursue a relationship or continue seeing them. I've always been honest.
You might be just outgoing and the guy would think you are leading him on but in reality you aren't. You can't help that.
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