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Old 05-09-2011, 08:39 AM
 
3 posts, read 4,362 times
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Default Dealing with past lovers

I've been dating a girl for the past 5 months. I realize shes has a past, so do we all, but shes constantly talkng about her past boyfriends. I was also aware that she'd had sex with a couple of girls a couple of years ago. Recently she told me that these girls were friends of hers. Shes still in contact with both of them (they live in her home town and she lives in my city). She says she loves me and I believe her but I still feel, I guess jealous would be the right word, when she talks about her past lovers. Its almost like shes proud of the fact that she had alot of them. Please give me any advice that would help me get over these feelings. Thanks
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Old 05-09-2011, 09:20 AM
 
3,573 posts, read 3,278,658 times
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You need to dump her ASAP. Who does that? Really. No one that loves and respects you will throw in your face how many people both men and women they've slept with. Some how she is proud of that fact and wants to talk about it. Immature. Move on to someone that can give you a normal and healthy relationship.
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Old 05-09-2011, 09:39 AM
 
1,469 posts, read 2,350,638 times
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Better conversations should come to mind.
How all conversations or (too many conversations) can revolve around her and her past tells me that you guys don't have much to talk about.
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Old 05-09-2011, 10:05 AM
 
5,548 posts, read 4,729,040 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by donie1 View Post
You need to dump her ASAP. Who does that? Really. No one that loves and respects you will throw in your face how many people both men and women they've slept with. Some how she is proud of that fact and wants to talk about it. Immature. Move on to someone that can give you a normal and healthy relationship.
This. I had one of these who couldn't stop talking about his past relationships and let me tell you, it got old really fast. It caused a lot of problems and despite my repeatedly telling him I didn't want to hear about this stuff he kept doing it.

Anyway, I'd get rid of this person. No good can come of this and you deserve to be with someone where YOU are the center of attention - not some past lover. Eww.
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Old 05-09-2011, 11:52 AM
 
538 posts, read 672,683 times
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Hmmm, I beg my wife to tell me about her past lovers. It really turns me on. (Totally serious here). Hmmmm....
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Old 05-09-2011, 12:17 PM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
1,165 posts, read 1,051,357 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by donie1 View Post
You need to dump her ASAP. Who does that? Really. No one that loves and respects you will throw in your face how many people both men and women they've slept with. Some how she is proud of that fact and wants to talk about it. Immature. Move on to someone that can give you a normal and healthy relationship.
Quote:
Originally Posted by recuerdeme View Post
Better conversations should come to mind.
How all conversations or (too many conversations) can revolve around her and her past tells me that you guys don't have much to talk about.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mistygrl092 View Post
This. I had one of these who couldn't stop talking about his past relationships and let me tell you, it got old really fast. It caused a lot of problems and despite my repeatedly telling him I didn't want to hear about this stuff he kept doing it.

Anyway, I'd get rid of this person. No good can come of this and you deserve to be with someone where YOU are the center of attention - not some past lover. Eww.

Yes. Yes. and Yes.

OP, stop wasting your time on her and please dump this chick! She's just living in the past and will continue to do so. There are a million and one things that you both could talk about, but instead she talks about her exes and puts them on pedestals. Like what others have said, it gets really old, really fast. Believe me, I've been guilty of doing this sort of thing in the past and it shows that there wasn't much to talk about between me and former loves. Also, I would get very annoyed very quickly if a guy did the exact same thing to me. Spend some time with someone who wants you move on from their past and and really get to know you!
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Old 05-09-2011, 12:22 PM
Status: "The price is wrong Bob!" (set 7 days ago)
 
Location: USA
9,398 posts, read 4,864,414 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonata36 View Post
Hmmm, I beg my wife to tell me about her past lovers. It really turns me on. (Totally serious here). Hmmmm....
How open and honest!


To the OP
Have you talked to her about it and tell your that it hurts you. she may not know how you feel?

Personally, Ive been exploring Sonata38's take and been trying to be more open on dicsussing old lovers with woman. Ive been getting this "Jaun, I never realized you were so open ". Not that it would work for everyone.
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Old 05-09-2011, 12:29 PM
 
3,573 posts, read 3,278,658 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonata36 View Post
Hmmm, I beg my wife to tell me about her past lovers. It really turns me on. (Totally serious here). Hmmmm....
Hmmm...Yeah but wonder if she told you the truth that some other guy really turned her on more then you then what...

Would that still be a turn on for you? Hmmmm..

Some things are best left unanswered....
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Old 05-09-2011, 12:32 PM
Status: "The price is wrong Bob!" (set 7 days ago)
 
Location: USA
9,398 posts, read 4,864,414 times
Reputation: 7064
Quote:
Originally Posted by donie1 View Post
Hmmm...Yeah but wonder if she told you the truth that some other guy really turned her on more then you then what...

Would that still be a turn on for you? Hmmmm..

Some things are best left unanswered....
But then he could learn from that and improve?
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Old 05-09-2011, 12:54 PM
 
3 posts, read 4,362 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LS Jaun View Post
But then he could learn from that and improve?
Why would I want to be compared to someone else? Im me, the person she says shes in love with. If shes so in love with her past and the memories of her past lovers then I dont see how theres any room for me in her future
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