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To me a vacation with someone you are having problems with would be the worse thing to do. I find vacations have a way of bringing problems to the fore if they are existing already. Being stuck together 24/7 will highlight even the tiniest of issues ten-fold IMO.
And that works with friends too. Never go on vacation with someone you already don't know and whose flaws you don't accept fully. Every single irritation becomes magnified and crystalised.
If you have serious problems no vacation is going to make it better in my opinion.
I have been on vacation with "friends" before and I think we wanted to kill each other by the time we got home. I can't even imagine spending 4 weeks trapped with someone I felt had done me wrong or with whom I had some real relationship troubles.
If the issue is only mild and surface yes the vacation might allow you some relaxation and rest to recharge batteries but if it is ingrained and deep , no chance. You would have to be catatonic drunk not to notice the cracks and these would resurface at the airport even if you got away with that one.
I think nowadays Hubby is the only person on the planet I would vacation with because we actually love spending all that time together. Neither of us resents the other being there .
If you love each other, it's worth a shot, you won't forget, but, it may soothe your pain. Alot of negative nannies(well, one) in this thread....It's up to you...Good luck!
Depends on why they are having problems. Is it just the stress of job that causes them to argue or is it more? If it's just the stressful environment and not enough time spent with each other, then a vacation may just be what the doctor ordered, however, other deeper issues will not be solved with vacation.
Eventually though, even if it's just stress, couples should work on resolving this, otherwise no vacation will help.
I agree. Suppose you're not spending enough quality time together because of work, kids, etc. So you go on vacation. But when you come back, won't you be back to the same problem again? That's why I think it makes more sense to stay at home and fix the problems there rather than take an expensive trip somewhere. Also, people don't realize that the problems they have with one another are often symptomatic of something bigger. For example, you can complain that your wife isn't spending enough time with you, that she's working too much or hanging out with her friends a lot. But shouldn't you be asking why? What if she's working late because the two of you are having financial difficulties? What if she's spending a lot of time away from you because she just doesn't enjoy being around you? How will going on a vacation fix either of those things?
That doesnt always happen that way. I know of a couple who work together driving long haul and when youre together 24/7 you sometimes need a break so occaisionally one of them will stay home for a week or so (theyre owner operators of their truck) and when it comes to vacation time, they both go on separate vacations to break away from each other. Theyve also been happily married for over 25 years now too.
Vacations arent always the answer though.
I guess the answer depends on why the relationship is failing. Is it failing because you have simply grown apart or is there truly something wrong. If you've grown apart then yes a vacation will help tremendously. If you're having real problems then I would say no... You need to work on the issues and no amount of vacationing will cure the problem
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I can't even imagine spending 4 weeks trapped with someone I felt had done me wrong or with whom I had some real relationship troubles.
