News, More black women consider 'dating out' (personalities, feelings, issues)

[LS Jaun]

Originally Posted by LuckyGem

There's a lot you can do.

#1. Don't consider it.

Race is a man-made social concept with zero foundation in biology, modern anthropology or science.

If you don't regard it as important or relevant it doesn't matter.

Right!

Originally Posted by BajanYankee

Here's another man-made social concept: The Internal Revenue Service.

I'll just ignore it, though. Since it's a man-made concept with zero foundation in biology, modern anthropology or science, it doesn't matter.

Right on!

Originally Posted by BajanYankee

Because women's nether regions don't tingle for men that are of a lower social status than them.

Right on the spot!

[Joy74]

Seems that many on this thread are from the south or northeast. This is a non- issue for those of us raised on the west coast. We are just light years ahead in regards to irr dating. Most black women I know dated interracial in middle school, high school, and college. Most of the weddings I have been to have been black women marrying non-black men. Its 2011. For those who can't seem to fathom dating or marrying another human being of a different ethnicity,you are seriously behind the times.

[The Siobhan]

I know that race is a social construct. But, one cannot dismiss how deeply woven this concept is in America, and much of the world.

I think those who say that we should ignore race are most likely those who haven't been the victim of racial taunts or violence.

Last year, a group of youth threw stones at me and told me to go back to Africa. One a month ago, I was called a n***** by an older white male. I live in a town where skinheads drive up and down predominately Black neighborhoods waving the Confederate Battle Flag, pretending that they are about to run over people, and yelling "f****** coons" out their windows. Today, I drove through country roads on my way to take an exam in the big city; some of those towns were "sundown" towns and even though my gas tank was low, I did not feel comfortable enough to stop to fill up.

And, I am presently in Illinois.

It really angers me when people attempt to dismiss race and how other's peoples perceptions about race impact many of our daily lives. I may not be genetically related to that one Black guy living in Austin, TX, but I bet he and I probably share a few experiences that happened to us because of our skin tone and/or phenotype.

[The Siobhan]

Originally Posted by Joy74

Seems that many on this thread are from the south or northeast. This is a non- issue for those of us raised on the west coast. We are just light years ahead in regards to irr dating. Most black women I know dated interracial in middle school, high school, and college. Most of the weddings I have been to have been black women marrying non-black men. Its 2011. For those who can't seem to fathom dating or marrying another human being of a different ethnicity,you are seriously behind the times.

I do agree with you about the WC and interracial dating. When I moved to Seattle, one of the first things that struck me was the number of BW/WM I saw together. Back in downstate Illinois, those types of relationships are still not common and are much the subject of gossip.

[sierraAZ]

Originally Posted by Lucario

?que?

Whatever I already quoted above.

[Peacelilies]

Originally Posted by The Siobhan

I know that race is a social construct. But, one cannot dismiss how deeply woven this concept is in America, and much of the world.

I think those who say that we should ignore race are most likely those who haven't been the victim of racial taunts or violence.

Last year, a group of youth threw stones at me and told me to go back to Africa. One a month ago, I was called a n***** by an older white male. I live in a town where skinheads drive up and down predominately Black neighborhoods waving the Confederate Battle Flag, pretending that they are about to run over people, and yelling "f****** coons" out their windows. Today, I drove through country roads on my way to take an exam in the big city; some of those towns were "sundown" towns and even though my gas tank was low, I did not feel comfortable enough to stop to fill up.

And, I am presently in Illinois.

It really angers me when people attempt to dismiss race and how other's peoples perceptions about race impact many of our daily lives. I may not be genetically related to that one Black guy living in Austin, TX, but I bet he and I probably share a few experiences that happened to us because of our skin tone and/or phenotype.

I completely agree with everything you have said.

[LS Jaun]

Originally Posted by The Siobhan

I do agree with you about the WC and interracial dating. When I moved to Seattle, one of the first things that struck me was the number of BW/WM I saw together. Back in downstate Illinois, those types of relationships are still not common and are much the subject of gossip.

The S/W is my territory and I would say the West coast and S/W in general as being pretty BW couple friendly. I don't think Ive had a rude comment from a black or white person when I have been out with a black woman in LV or Phx and we are typically the only BF WM in the place. I used to glance around a bar expecting some look and the most Ive every seen was an initial glance and then nothing after that.

Riding the subway through some buroughs in NY apparently will get you some direct stares too.

[Peacelilies]

Alanboy

Tell me which other group of women is stereotyped as loud, intimidating, aggressive, fat, unfeminine, uneducated... among others?

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by Peacelilies

Alanboy

Tell me which other group of women is stereotyped as loud, intimidating, aggressive, fat, unfeminine, uneducated... among others?

Every race of women have their stereotypes to deal with

White- most privledged, promiscous

Asian- submissive, quiet, geishas

Hispanic- mostly maids or other domestic occupations

The reality of America; you are going to get stereotyped, it is what it is.

[Peacelilies]

Originally Posted by Alanboy395

Every race of women have their stereotypes to deal with

White- most privledged, promiscous

Asian- submissive, quiet, geishas

Hispanic- mostly maids or other domestic occupations

The reality of America; you are going to get stereotyped, it is what it is.

If you read my earlier posting, you'd see that I was referring to negative stereotypes, not just mere stereotypes. Black women have a disproportional amount of negative stereotypes compared to other races of women and not only is it not true for the vast majority, but it is also unfair. I am none of those things. Most black women I know are none of those things yet these stereotypes persist and cause an impediment to those trying to date out of their race.

I got upset when I saw the post by Bson and Antlered because those attitudes are actually not uncommon but when you try to ask the people to define what makes black women "scary or intimidating" you find that they either have no facts to back it up or whatever facts they use, can be applied to other races of women.

I think sometimes people forget that black women are people and that they have feelings too. These things hurt. Would you like it if someone judged you before you'd ever said a word? Would you like it if your sister was judged as undesirable?
I just wish people would take black women as individuals. Forget stereotypes, forget TV. There are sexy black women, skinny black women, ultra feminine black women, submissive black women, uber smart black women, prudish black women, freaky black women, black women into country music, black women into other races.... it ranges the gamut. Get to know one on a personal level instead of letting stereotypes think for you.