News, More black women consider 'dating out' (boyfriend, Chinese, family)

[ParkerP]

I'm a black woman and I can tell you what happened. We are fed a lot of crap about how important it is to keep the black family together and only date black men and keep black unity going and blah blah black, blah blah black. And we get this shoved down our throats from birth. Then all of a sudden, we get older and find out that some of our male counterparts really don't feel quite as strongly as we were taught to feel about this whole black solidarity thing, LOL. So its like hey, no need to keep limiting ourselves yanno?
Personally, I would like to marry a black man but I'm not as closed-minded as I once was to other races anymore.

[Pimpy]

Originally Posted by asutton0144

I think that this day and time women (black women) would love to just find a good man.There are so many black men that are not working, on drugs, abussive, selfish, and some other things......... Oh, wait a minute that could describe all men.

We as black women ( 30 and up ) were taught to stay in our race and look what has happened..............

Just my thoughts and trying to type with one hand (wrist fracture)

I'm also typing with one hand but it's not because of a wrist fracture.

Has anyone ever considered that black women are turning to white men because all the black men are shacked up with white women? I think it's a numbers game.

[Zippy7fo]

Originally Posted by Pimpy

I'm also typing with one hand but it's not because of a wrist fracture.

Has anyone ever considered that black women are turning to white men because all the black men are shacked up with white women? I think it's a numbers game.

and Latina's, and Asians........

[Alexus]

Out of all the races of woman that I have dated, I find black women to be the deepest, most interesting women of all. They make the best lovers, the most devoted friends, and provide the most interesting conversation and companionship. They are incredibly interesting and witty. They have beautiful bodies and they are always incredibly clean. Impeccible hygiene. They also have a greater awareness of people's true intentions and deep insight into human nature. Nothing more intimidating to any other race of man or woman than a beautiful, intelligent black woman. Even intelligent, handsome, accomplished black men are shaken, because they know that with this black Queen, they will be held to the highest standard of all. Many can't live up.

It is for these reasons that I think black women should expand their horizons and consider all races. The search for somebody worthy can't be confined by race in today's international society.

[Jadel812]

Originally Posted by Torrey

I tried to date a black woman once. She said no because I was white. I said does that mean just because I am white? She said yes, and for no other reason. Blacks women have always been told to date/marry within their race or be segregated by their own race. Whites do the same, yet it is the whites who are always called racist?

That all depends on the country you come from. In the caribbeans and even in Europe there are many black people who do not object to marrying someone of another race.

[miu]

Originally Posted by Anu2

I didn't think I was being negative or "knocking" anything. I just said that I don't understand why dating outside of one's race would be an issue if one is compatible and attracted to the other person. If ones values are totally different or one is simply not physically attracted to the person, I understand, but saying "no" just on the basis of race doesn't make sense to me. Again, not trying to be negative, I just don't understand the reasoning behind it.

I think that it's great to be openminded about dating outside ones race. But as an Asian woman, I find it icky when men of other races approach because they have a thing for Asian women. And I find that a huge turnoff for me. I have chosen my boyfriends based more on their inner qualities. I want someone really smart, slightly ambitious, kind, funny and who also has similar interests and morals to mine.

[Nthng2Prv]

Originally Posted by John1960

RICHMOND, Va. - For years, Toinetta Jones played the dating game by her mom's strict rule.

"Mom always told me, 'Don't you ever bring a white man home,'" recalled Jones, echoing an edict issued by many Southern, black mothers.

But at 37, the Alexandria divorcee has shifted to dating "anyone who asks me out," regardless of race.

"I don't sit around dreaming about the perfect black man I'm going to marry," Jones said.

Black women around the country also are reconsidering deep-seated reservations toward interracial relationships, reservations rooted in America's history of slavery and segregation.

More black women consider 'dating out' - Yahoo! News (broken link)

You know I have to admit, I'm a Black woman and I just can't do it. I've dated Indo-Caribbean men, Puerto Rican men, but I could never imagine myself dating a white man (or a white woman either bc I'm bisexual). Whenever someone asks me why I haven't, I always just think to myself what could we possibly have in common?

[Jadel812]

Originally Posted by Nthng2Prv

You know I have to admit, I'm a Black woman and I just can't do it. I've dated Indo-Caribbean men, Puerto Rican men, but I could never imagine myself dating a white man (or a white woman either bc I'm bisexual). Whenever someone asks me why I haven't, I always just think to myself what could we possibly have in common?

There is a movie that I believe that some of you may find interesting, It's called Something New starring Sanaa Lathan and Simon Baker. You all should watch it, it's really a great movie.

[GoddessofRandomThoughts]

Originally Posted by Nthng2Prv

You know I have to admit, I'm a Black woman and I just can't do it. I've dated Indo-Caribbean men, Puerto Rican men, but I could never imagine myself dating a white man (or a white woman either bc I'm bisexual). Whenever someone asks me why I haven't, I always just think to myself what could we possibly have in common?

The same things you would have in common with men from any other race, country, ethinic group, whatever.

A person is a person. Yes, how, where and by whom you were raised makes a difference but in the end it is about who you are as an individual.

I have met men who are black, btw I am black, with a similar background to my own and had little or nothing in common with them. That we are black and from the same socioeconomic group does not guarantee that we will click.

I have met white, black, latino, asian etc men from all socioenomic groups and found that my getting along with them does not depend on their race or their upbringing but on who they have become since they became adults.

We as a race, the human race, spend way too much time worrying about stupid things like color , religion, social class, etc.

There really are more important things to consider when choosing someone to spend your life with.


I guess it is obvious from this rant that I don't worry about color when I choose who I wish to date. I have dated men from a number of races.

BTW, I never got that talk from my mother or anyone else in my family about who to bring home, at least not in regards to color. Guess we didn't get that memo.

[hamiltonpl]

Originally Posted by Tish Thompson

I was raised to believe that I should "stick with my own kind". The kicker is that I was raised in predominantly white areas. My mother told us we didn't want mixed kids because of the hatred people have against them yada yada yada. I'm not a mixed kid and don't have mixed kids, but I don't think they get picked on any more than anyone else does. That's just part of being a kid.

I think there's more of a perpetuation of fear rather than protection. Times have changed; we can't keep using the 'fear of getting beat' as an excuse to limit ourselves.

I've heard the excuse that you shouldn't marry outside of your race because "it's horrible on the kids" born as a result. I don't think people care. Would anybody really blame a kid born of a marriage you didn't approve of? It's a KID for crying out loud. None of us picked our parents!

If two people love each other, a superficial thing like race shouldn't come between them.