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Unread 08-20-2011, 12:54 PM
 
Location: NYC
7,283 posts, read 4,627,394 times
Reputation: 9614
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Siobhan View Post
This here is why the article was written.

To generalize, Black women feel this obligation to find a Black man. Black men don't feel that same obligation.

Thus, it is time to release our guilt and take the same perspective as our Black male counterparts.
One thing that people seem to miss about these articles is the class angle. I have yet to see an artie printed in the mainstream media about lower income black women and their dating prospects. Why? Nobody cares. And come to think about it, the same goes for white women (articles based on books like MARRY HIM: THE CASE FOR SETTLING are also only about middle to upper income women). The reason why these articles are written isn't so simplistic.
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Unread 08-20-2011, 12:56 PM
 
Location: NYC
7,283 posts, read 4,627,394 times
Reputation: 9614
Quote:
Originally Posted by itshim View Post
Hey I'll admit that I thought it was a BW at first because i've heard black women talk this before on a number of occasions. But that doesn't negate what I said in my second paragraph. Normally, bigotry against black men is the most accepted form of ignorance. Even the article itself insinuates that black men are generally uneducated, unmotivated, unemployed or underemployed, prone to criminalism, afraid of monogamy and date interracially for the "wrong" reasons.

Generally white men (or non-black men) have the luxury of being given the benefit of the doubt in comparison. The author even insuates that merely dating a "non-black man" (no emphasis on a "good" one mind you...because it's already understood that they are "good men" by virtue of not being born black men) and as a result their situation will improve.

And people to some extent, accept that as some form of truth, even enough to boldly print that in a major media news source outlet with a pretty positive reception. Calling it a "pity party" is just your way not to own up to it. I guess it's easier to keep the train going rather than to have it come to a full stop.
Excellent point regarding the concept of "good." +1
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Unread 08-20-2011, 12:57 PM
 
Location: Austin, TX
1,896 posts, read 1,416,507 times
Reputation: 2197
Does anyone remember this song from the 90's? I remember seeing the video on MTV when I was a teenager, and it really stuck with me. I think it was the first time I had seen a black woman/white man relationship depicted on TV (I'm too young to remember Uhura from the original Star Trek):


Everclear - Heartspark Dollarsign - YouTube
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Unread 08-20-2011, 01:13 PM
 
Location: 20 years from now
3,259 posts, read 1,532,579 times
Reputation: 1702
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Siobhan View Post
This is the danger of making presumptions about a person's views and tolerances by just reading a few posts written by them.

If you are wanting to advance this whole "Poor Black Man/Brother Misunderstood" mentality, then you may want to use another poster as your example because at the end of the day, I don't give a damn about the decisions two consenting adults do in their private lives. I posted about my observations on living in Seattle because it was in contrast to what I observed in downstate Illinois.
You're entitled to your feelings. I think my point still stands as is. The idea of black women "allegedly" opening up to IR dating is received more so as a celebration and a positive step in the right direction for their own happiness is a stark contrast of black men who make an announcement of doing the same and as a result they are vilified and open to public scrutiny for making a similar decision.

Your point about Seattle, wasn't necessarily a criticism of you--but more so of what the general reception is like between the two.
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Unread 08-20-2011, 01:14 PM
 
Location: So Cal
17,688 posts, read 11,665,785 times
Reputation: 16131
Quote:
Originally Posted by passionatearts View Post
Does anyone remember this song from the 90's? I remember seeing the video on MTV when I was a teenager, and it really stuck with me. I think it was the first time I had seen a black woman/white man relationship depicted on TV (I'm too young to remember Uhura from the original Star Trek):


Everclear - Heartspark Dollarsign - YouTube
I was too young for the original Star Trek, I remember that Uhura was a hottie......
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Unread 08-20-2011, 02:52 PM
 
170 posts, read 48,536 times
Reputation: 188
Black men have pursued women outside the race for years. It's about time sistas started doing the same thing and stopped waiting around for that "perfect Black man." Hell, that Black man you have your eye on just might be dating the blonde next door!

I'm totally open to dating men of different races. More options that way.
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Unread 08-20-2011, 03:25 PM
 
1,448 posts, read 1,073,938 times
Reputation: 557
test post
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Unread 08-20-2011, 03:31 PM
 
2,997 posts, read 1,745,481 times
Reputation: 1679
Quote:
Originally Posted by John1960 View Post
RICHMOND, Va. - For years, Toinetta Jones played the dating game by her mom's strict rule.

"Mom always told me, 'Don't you ever bring a white man home,'" recalled Jones, echoing an edict issued by many Southern, black mothers.

But at 37, the Alexandria divorcee has shifted to dating "anyone who asks me out," regardless of race.

"I don't sit around dreaming about the perfect black man I'm going to marry," Jones said.

Black women around the country also are reconsidering deep-seated reservations toward interracial relationships, reservations rooted in America's history of slavery and segregation.

More black women consider 'dating out' - Yahoo! News (broken link)
I was walking out of Sams Club, and i hear this nice sounding Motorcycle with that familiar Harley sound ; I look around and low and behold...theres a ****** with a Sister on the back . I said to the Black Man standing next to me (Im white by the way....) : 'Now, theres something you dont see everyday....a ****** driving a Sister around !"
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Unread 08-20-2011, 06:51 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn, New York
10,566 posts, read 4,003,124 times
Reputation: 3625
[quote=Peacelilies;20528273]There's so much wrong in your comments... I don't even know where to begin. Let me start with my experience. When I lived in the DC metro area, I actually saw a lot more "Michelle Obama" type women, before Michelle Obama came on the scene. By that I mean well educated, professional women, who were not in fields like cosmetology (more on this) or HR. Today, the women I know in my immediate circle are MBA holders, Engineers, Nurses and Teachers. [quote=Peacelilies;20528273]

That's good for your friends. For every one of them, there's two loud-mouthed chicks with a degree in Advertising from Coppin State pushing paper at the DMV and enjoying 3-hour lunch breaks on the job.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Peacelilies View Post
But let's put personal experience aside, because depending on where you live, you can see different things.
Let's not put it aside. If I see this in Washington, DC, which has more educated blacks than any city in the world, I can only imagine what you see in Detroit, St. Louis or Memphis. The truth is, you can go on Facebook or on a few law firm/investment bank/accounting firm websites and track down 70% of the "successful" blacks in New York City within an hour. The community is that small.

According to the media and black women, the dating options for black men look something like this:

Michelle Obama, Susan Rice, Nikki Giovanni, Robinne Lee, Halle Berry

The dating options for black women, on the other hand, look something like this:

Fred Sanford, Bruh Man from the "Fouth" Floor, Jody from Baby Boy, Jerome the Mechanic, and Steve Urkel

In reality, it's more like:

Peaches who works in Payroll with a degree from Bethune Cookman dates Jerome the Mechanic who has his own shop.

Maybe it's just me, but I don't consider some chick who has a finance degree from Valdosta State to be the "better" of a guy who has his boilermaker certificate. But people use the statistics to argue that "there are all of these successful black women" when the OVERWHELMING majority of them are nothing like Michelle Obama, and are in no way superior to their male, blue-collar counterparts.

I'm just saying.

Last edited by BajanYankee; 08-20-2011 at 07:00 PM..
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Unread 08-20-2011, 07:00 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn, New York
10,566 posts, read 4,003,124 times
Reputation: 3625
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ise View Post
I think here in brazil, about this race issue, is so much better... I mean, the colour of the skin is just like colour of eyes or hair, doesn't mean anything for MOST of us brazilians... Of course we have some stupid people as any other place, but in general it's common sense that race has nothing to do with personal interests or values or anything related to personality and love.
Brazilians are the last ones who should be lecturing anyone on racial prejudice. European Brazilians fuggs with Pele and the other footballers and that's it. Nearly all of the dark blacks in Brazil are lower-class service workers. There's definitely a "light-skin curly hair = good" and "dark-skin kinky hair = bad" dynamic going on down there. Everything else is just your romanticism.

Our President is Black. How about yours?

By the way, are the death squads still killing children in the favelas down there?
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