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Calling her back will be a huge mistake. You made a stand now stick to it. If you don't, she will walk all over you forever.
There is a saying that "time heals all wounds" but not if you keep picking at the scab! Stop looking through pictures, laying around and feeling sorry for yourself!
She'll be back. She is going to want her stuff or have some dumb question to ask.
So in the meantime, get up and dust yourself off. Toughen up. It's going to hurt for a few weeks but it will get better as you slowly wing off her.
Calling her back will be a huge mistake. You made a stand now stick to it. If you don't, she will walk all over you forever.
There is a saying that "time heals all wounds" but not if you keep picking at the scab! Stop looking through pictures, laying around and feeling sorry for yourself!
She'll be back. She is going to want her stuff or have some dumb question to ask.
So in the meantime, get up and dust yourself off. Toughen up. It's going to hurt for a few weeks but it will get better as you slowly wing off her.
Another cynic heard from
Read his other thread, you seem to have made some rash judgements.
Calling her back will be a huge mistake. You made a stand now stick to it. If you don't, she will walk all over you forever.
I have to disagree with this, if SHE was in the wrong, then yes you would be correct and that might end in her feeling that you are a pushover. In my opinion HE is wrong and if you are wrong the onus is on YOU to appologize, it doesnt mean she will walk all over you in the future, because when you are wrong you are wrong, you say sorry and move on.
I'm sorry to hear of your heart ache, but it is common after a breakup. And you will find that no one can take her place.
As I read that sentence, I thought, "And to that, THANK GAWD."
See, after reading about how the little miss would spend an entire paycheck on a purse and yet not offer a penny toward any household expenses, I knew right then and there she was in it for the lifestyle.
Speedy, I think you did the right thing. I know you are hurting right now, but this woman was going to take you for a financial ride. She is not mature enough for marriage. No one who would blow $800 on a pocketbook when that is a quarter of her income is.
As for what Loves said, yes, it is advisable to look within yourself and see where you might have contributed to the whole mess. I don't want to kick you when you are down, so I'll just say that it sounds like you might be a bit of an enabler. I was that way, too, so maybe I'm projecting, but I do see a little bit of me in you. My ex-husband took it for granted that I would just be there to pay for everything--because I did. My fault for sending him that message.
And you know what? Marriage schmarriage: Taking someone for granted means you have no respect for the person. There is no marriage where there is no respect. I eventually grew quite resentful of his mooching, and I suspect that you already were resentful of your ex-fiancee's, or you wouldn't have posted your first thread about this. You were speaking from the heart and the gut when you posted that thread, and although some folks got on you for not wanting to share, it seems to me that they did not see this woman taking advantage of you. Judging by her reaction to your attempt to sort things out, just imagine how she'd have reacted were you already married. Oh, yes, she is the kind of woman that C-D's He-Man Woman Haters Club hold up as a shining example of a woman who would take a man to the cleaners in a divorce as part of her plan for lifelong financial security. It's a shame, because women like that give the rest of us a bad name.
Quite frankly--and I hope this does not offend you--she sounds like a spoiled little brat, and you are better off without her.
I have to disagree with this, if SHE was in the wrong, then yes you would be correct and that might end in her feeling that you are a pushover. In my opinion HE is wrong and if you are wrong the onus is on YOU to appologize, it doesnt mean she will walk all over you in the future, because when you are wrong you are wrong, you say sorry and move on.
Now herein is the problem and I doubt that many will get it. Neither one could be in the "wrong" on their failure to make it work out. It sounds like they are incompatible personalities and it has sounded that way from his first thread.
Another ant and grasshopper story with no give on either side.
As I read that sentence, I thought, "And to that, THANK GAWD."
See, after reading about how the little miss would spend an entire paycheck on a purse and yet not offer a penny toward any household expenses, I knew right then and there she was in it for the lifestyle.
Speedy, I think you did the right thing. I know you are hurting right now, but this woman was going to take you for a financial ride. She is not mature enough for marriage. No one who would blow $800 on a pocketbook when that is a quarter of her income is.
As for what Loves said, yes, it is advisable to look within yourself and see where you might have contributed to the whole mess. I don't want to kick you when you are down, so I'll just say that it sounds like you might be a bit of an enabler. I was that way, too, so maybe I'm projecting, but I do see a little bit of me in you. My ex-husband took it for granted that I would just be there to pay for everything--because I did. My fault for sending him that message.
And you know what? Marriage schmarriage: Taking someone for granted means you have no respect for the person. There is no marriage where there is no respect. I eventually grew quite resentful of his mooching, and I suspect that you already were resentful of your ex-fiancee's, or you wouldn't have posted your first thread about this. You were speaking from the heart and the gut when you posted that thread, and although some folks got on you for not wanting to share, it seems to me that they did not see this woman taking advantage of you. Judging by her reaction to your attempt to sort things out, just imagine how she'd have reacted were you already married. Oh, yes, she is the kind of woman that C-D's He-Man Woman Haters Club hold up as a shining example of a woman who would take a man to the cleaners in a divorce as part of her plan for lifelong financial security. It's a shame, because women like that give the rest of us a bad name.
Quite frankly--and I hope this does not offend you--she sounds like a spoiled little brat, and you are better off without her.
Hang in there. You did the right thing.
But be fair my friend...he admitted in the last thread to never asking her to financially contribute to their relationship. She obviously felt free to spend her paychecks on things like designer purses. This doesn't make her "in it for the lifestyle".
Since he NEVER talked to her about this he essentially gave her no opportunity to do things another way.
He owed it to her and to their relationship to COMMUNICATE his thoughts and feelings before they boiled over and caused him to lose his temper.
I simply CANNOT agree that he did the right thing - and if he's really honest with himself he knows deep down inside he didn't.
As I read that sentence, I thought, "And to that, THANK GAWD."
See, after reading about how the little miss would spend an entire paycheck on a purse and yet not offer a penny toward any household expenses, I knew right then and there she was in it for the lifestyle.
Speedy, I think you did the right thing. I know you are hurting right now, but this woman was going to take you for a financial ride. She is not mature enough for marriage. No one who would blow $800 on a pocketbook when that is a quarter of her income is.
As for what Loves said, yes, it is advisable to look within yourself and see where you might have contributed to the whole mess. I don't want to kick you when you are down, so I'll just say that it sounds like you might be a bit of an enabler. I was that way, too, so maybe I'm projecting, but I do see a little bit of me in you. My ex-husband took it for granted that I would just be there to pay for everything--because I did. My fault for sending him that message.
And you know what? Marriage schmarriage: Taking someone for granted means you have no respect for the person. There is no marriage where there is no respect. I eventually grew quite resentful of his mooching, and I suspect that you already were resentful of your ex-fiancee's, or you wouldn't have posted your first thread about this. You were speaking from the heart and the gut when you posted that thread, and although some folks got on you for not wanting to share, it seems to me that they did not see this woman taking advantage of you. Judging by her reaction to your attempt to sort things out, just imagine how she'd have reacted were you already married. Oh, yes, she is the kind of woman that C-D's He-Man Woman Haters Club hold up as a shining example of a woman who would take a man to the cleaners in a divorce as part of her plan for lifelong financial security. It's a shame, because women like that give the rest of us a bad name.
Quite frankly--and I hope this does not offend you--she sounds like a spoiled little brat, and you are better off without her.
Hang in there. You did the right thing.
Too bad I can not rep you. A completely brilliant post without all the emotional projection that people are making.
Another poster who calls people negative names who doesn't agree with their opinions
I did read the thread and stand by my post.
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