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I am Mrs. Angela Pamela Anderson from Liberia, married to late Mr. Paul K. Anderson, but we lost him to cancer of the blood 15 month ago.Before his death, he was a minister in the current regime of Liberia.
But following his death,the government falsely accused him of embezzlement, of which we were taking to Court, but all came out in our favor. After the case we relocate to Republque Du Benin here in Africa. Presently my only son is schooling here, so we decided now to establish with the found willed to my only son by his father late father (I have never been into any business venture before because all along I and my husband were civil servants), but because of the investment regulations here in Africa coupled with economic instability, I and my family attorney have decided to invest outside Africa.
I await your reply that will enable our family attorney contact you with the details and arrange for a meeting with you so that all issues will be documented. Our family representative will come to represent us if a meeting is schedule and after the meeting we can commence immediately on the project suggested by you. A memorandum of understanding will be signed between you and us before we commence.
Please tell me more about yourself and your country in general.
I am, looking forward to hear from you.
Regards,
Mrs. Angela P. Anderson.
... and my reply ...
Dear Pam:
I really am touched that you've contacted me - I've watched all the Baywatch episodes and besides The Hoff you're the best thing on that show!
I don't quite understand how you ended up in Liberia - were you filming a sequel to Barb Wire?
And my condolences on your husband - didn't you used to call him "Neo"?
Anyway, down to business. You asked that I tell you about my country and myself. Well, country first: I live in the Eastern part of the USA, where I fled to from Phoenix, Arizona. See, there was growing talk about aliens coming into town and it worried me, my three wives and 14 children. So we figured we'd just move to Pennsylvania and get on the welfare dole. So far, so good - in fact, because of my drug addiction I receive $1500/mn from the government, in addition to all the usual niceties - food stamps, medical, college funding, etc. They even continued to send the checks to my wives when I did that turn in Attica. (Attica ... Africa ... see? We have a LOT in common!)
Also, the USA has just narrowly avoided going bankrupt, but that also doesn't bother me since I have a cache of food, water and firearms buried in the backyard (next to our dear-departed Grandma Mumbabwe - you might know her).
As for me - I'm a Caucasian male, 75 years old, 5'2" and 345 pounds. I'd say I'm representative of the average USA citizen. I have pierced nipples and a nose ring, many tribal tattoos and sing A Capella with the homeless citizens on Saturdays. I make extra money during the week by sharpening plastic knives and trying the handles of parked cars.
I look forward to our "business" - I like that you're letting ME decide on the "project" we will undertake - I have MANY ideas, believe me!
I am looking forward to groping you,
Regards,
Mr. Jubilation T. Cornpone
Indeed, the people have been kind and now there's 3.
My gratitude to all those who made it possible. Kisses and hugs.
Congrats, tempty! It's so pretty!
Quote:
Originally Posted by SifuPhil
Wow - this made my day!
... and my reply ...
Dear Pam:
I really am touched that you've contacted me - I've watched all the Baywatch episodes and besides The Hoff you're the best thing on that show!
I don't quite understand how you ended up in Liberia - were you filming a sequel to Barb Wire?
And my condolences on your husband - didn't you used to call him "Neo"?
Anyway, down to business. You asked that I tell you about my country and myself. Well, country first: I live in the Eastern part of the USA, where I fled to from Phoenix, Arizona. See, there was growing talk about aliens coming into town and it worried me, my three wives and 14 children. So we figured we'd just move to Pennsylvania and get on the welfare dole. So far, so good - in fact, because of my drug addiction I receive $1500/mn from the government, in addition to all the usual niceties - food stamps, medical, college funding, etc. They even continued to send the checks to my wives when I did that turn in Attica. (Attica ... Africa ... see? We have a LOT in common!)
Also, the USA has just narrowly avoided going bankrupt, but that also doesn't bother me since I have a cache of food, water and firearms buried in the backyard (next to our dear-departed Grandma Mumbabwe - you might know her).
As for me - I'm a Caucasian male, 75 years old, 5'2" and 345 pounds. I'd say I'm representative of the average USA citizen. I have pierced nipples and a nose ring, many tribal tattoos and sing A Capella with the homeless citizens on Saturdays. I make extra money during the week by sharpening plastic knives and trying the handles of parked cars.
I look forward to our "business" - I like that you're letting ME decide on the "project" we will undertake - I have MANY ideas, believe me!
I am looking forward to groping you,
Regards,
Mr. Jubilation T. Cornpone
I laughed till I cried at this one, Phil. Thank you. I needed that.
Hey, if they send anything I'll post it in here or on my dusty blog.
Okay.
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