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I always paid my own bill <asked for separate checks right up front> on a first date. I simply don't believe in 'owing' a man for anything, or that he 'owes' me by asking me out, and I don't play games. If it works out great and he and I got along, then we would be able to discuss - pizza or fine dining? Grill out or cook? You make half, I bring the other half? I can't afford this, you can't afford that, this week.
People make too big of a deal out of it. If you like each other, talk to each other. Even after 29 years of marriage, sometimes DH pays, sometimes I pay. That's just the way it is.
I don't know what kind of girls you're dating, but I'd never expect sex after only a few dates.
If it was offered, I think I'd be more even discouraged than if she didn't offer to put their hand in her purse.
1) Most women here (United States) put out after only a few dates, some after a few hours. They're liberated! Sort of makes them whorish I suppose, but I'm taking advantage of their feminism.
2) I've never had one woman "offer" sex. Ever. There have been plenty, however, that were extremely agreeable once the topic was brought up.
Particularly the part where I said "Maybe this thread isn't the best one to ask this, it's on a slight tangent from the OP, but it isn't the only thread where similar attitudes have been displayed."
or
"Again I stress that the guy in question in the OP does exhibit some odd behaviour, and goes against the social norm, my question is more on a general level."
Let me know if there's any particular wording you're struggling with in there.......
Oh, by the way, if my buddy calls me and says "hey Bob, wanna meet me at the bar tonight for a few beers?", that does NOT mean thatI expect him to pick up the tab for the whole night.If I did, I don't think I'd be his friend long !!I'm waiting for a good explanation of exactly why it's different on a date.
All I'm hearing so far is "that's the way it is".
Why is it that way ? Why should it be ? Exactly where is the difference ?
Are you not comprehending the question ?
that isnt what I said the friend said it was "Hey Bob, wanna go to the bar tonight...PS your paying for my meal and my beers" not ""hey Bob, wanna meet me at the bar tonight for a few beers?"...you obviously do not read what others post. And if you want to ask a question in 'general'' when the thread is about something specific, just start a new thread relating to your topic. In fact there is another thread about the topic of equality in paying for dates. THIS thread is about a person inviting another person out and then expecting the person they invited to pay
1) Most women here (United States) put out after only a few dates, some after a few hours. They're liberated! Sort of makes them whorish I suppose, but I'm taking advantage of their feminism.
LOL. So, you like whorish women. Yet you don't wanna pay for it. Or you want them to pay half. Classy on all counts.
By the way, you're new here. Do you happen to be from the same imaginary place the other brilliant foreigner is from?
LOL. So, you like whorish women. Yet you don't wanna pay for it. Or you at least want them to pay half. Classy on all counts.
By the way, you're new here. Do you happen to be are you from the same imaginary place the other brilliant foreigner is from?
I don't like whorish women, but I do like sex. If they're providing, why not take advantage? Also, when did I ever state I'd make a woman pay half for a date? Never. Never ever. If I ask a girl out, the implication is I'm paying. I'll even pay if a girl asks me out because I think the whole concept of women paying is far too progressive for my tastes, and honestly makes me feel cheap.
I'm from San Antonio, as stated on my profile. If this place is imaginary, tell all the illegals they might want to move.
I don't like whorish women, but I do like sex. If they're providing, why not take advantage? Also, when did I ever state I'd make a woman pay half for a date? Never. Never ever. If I ask a girl out, the implication is I'm paying. I'll even pay if a girl asks me out because I think the whole concept of women paying is far too progressive for my tastes, and honestly makes me feel cheap.
I'm from San Antonio, as stated on my profile. If this place is imaginary, tell all the illegals they might want to move.
Very well, I stand corrected. Good know you will actually pay the tab for the whores you don't like, but will still be intimate with. LOL.
We have to presume that the subject of finance was not discussed in any way by any party prior to the date, otherwise we wouldn't have this thread.
So, if your friend asks you out for a beer or two, do you make them pay ?
Quote:
Originally Posted by darrensmooth
that isnt what I said the friend said it was "Hey Bob, wanna go to the bar tonight...PS your paying for my meal and my beers" not ""hey Bob, wanna meet me at the bar tonight for a few beers?"...you obviously do not read what others post. And if you want to ask a question in 'general'' when the thread is about something specific, just start a new thread relating to your topic. In fact there is another thread about the topic of equality in paying for dates. THIS thread is about a person inviting another person out and then expecting the person they invited to pay
It's poop because you're spewing it. It has nothing to do with what anyone here is used to. Oh, wait. You know what all of us Western women are used to. I forgot.
Not necessarily. I keep saying how it is just culturally different and how I even date western women regardless.
Quote:
So, ALL these women you date are trained from birth to split the check. NO ONE in this imaginary place you are from will allow a man to pay? When you ask a woman out, you are absolutely sure they will not expect you to pay, just as EVERY woman here does.
I guess you don’t read the line where I say there are always exceptions to the rule. Heck, there are some Asian girls I’ve dated who won’t contribute to expenses just like there have been some western girls who did mean it when they said they wanted to pay.
But generally speaking, women do expect men to pay, do the asking, take the initiative, etc. Can’t deny that fact. Look around this forum, google it, etc. Once again, this IS NOT WRONG/RIGHT. Couples do as they want. In my case, most girls don’t wait for a “couple of dates” or until we have gone through the initial stages, or have become an official couple. They contribute to expenses, show courtesy and generosity, etc. right off the bat. They like it, I like it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SCGranny
I always paid my own bill <asked for separate checks right up front> on a first date. I simply don't believe in 'owing' a man for anything, or that he 'owes' me by asking me out, and I don't play games. If it works out great and he and I got along, then we would be able to discuss - pizza or fine dining? Grill out or cook? You make half, I bring the other half? I can't afford this, you can't afford that, this week.
People make too big of a deal out of it. If you like each other, talk to each other. Even after 29 years of marriage, sometimes DH pays, sometimes I pay. That's just the way it is.
If a girl asks me out it is because there is something she finds nice about me, some sort of an attraction, and so on. If I accept her invitation it is because I also feel the same way for her. Therefore, I can’t see myself sitting there with my hands on my lap pretending I don’t see the bill when it is brought to the table or fiddle with my phone as she pays. I’ll pay my part or the whole thing. One of us will deny or accept. But whatever happens, the next activity one of us will take care of it or both of us. There is no such thing as entitlement or gender cards played. Once again, this is not bad/right. It works fine between them and me.
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