Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I'm not looking for anything long term. I just want to hook up with her, honestly.
How would I go about asking about boundaries/if she has an open relationship?
First, mentally prepare yourself for her to storm off, act offended, act like you're the one who has horribly misinterpreted the relationship and her "innocent" behavior. Then sit down across from her, tell her you're very interested in a relationship with her, but you're very unclear on what exactly your relationship is, and you need some explanations.
This is the part where she either storms off "offended" and blames you, or - she'll act mature, take responsibility for the confusion, say how she values your contribution to the relationship and doesn't want to lose it no matter what, and that she wants to be your friend, or maybe something more.
The goal is at the end of the day to either lose a dead end string along, or find out that your relationship with her has actual substance to it and means something to her.
Edit - I'd be careful with the Bluff method. No offense, but if you're too scared to simply ask her a question and talk to her, physically being flirty and seducing her seems way too advanced. I think that method requires you to be pretty good at reading cues and body language, which (again, no offense) - you don't give off that vibe.
So were meeting again for coffee tomorrow. Should I ask if she's in an open relationship, or just let things be as they are?
If I do ask, how do I do it?
If you play that card and she's not, that may be an awkward knife in the relationship that's too much to take. Of course, that may be fine with you. Just be aware.
Personally, I think you're investing too much in this for what you're getting out of it, and I worry that's unhealthy for you in the long run.
Honestly, I dont feel comfortable asking her the status of her relationship, because based on facebook, it seems pretty legit.
I'm not sure how much more physical I can get than kissing her on the cheek, though.
To play the devil's advocate, if you're not even comfortable enough to ask the status of her relationship, do you really think you're going to find the comfort level to walk up and kiss her? Do you really think you'll be comfortable enough to seduce her knowing she has a BF? Do you really think you're comfortable enough to handle the drama that may come about if/when you and BF have to be in the same space after that scenario takes place (even if he professes to be cool with it?)
I have to wonder if this is all wasted time and you might ultimately be happier pursuing a girl who doesn't already have a boyfriend, a partner, a husband... I know sometimes it seems like all the girls are already taken, but usually that isn't entirely true. Probably if you looked harder, there would be some nice single girls in your area who are lonely just like you, and who you might be able to have a relationship with without all this drama.
Meeting with her in an hour. Considering asking her about her relationship. I was thinking of being like, "so are you this flirty with everyone, or just me?"
Meeting with her in an hour. Considering asking her about her relationship. I was thinking of being like, "so are you this flirty with everyone, or just me?"
Ask her to go away on a weekend trip with you to a nudist camp.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
