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I was just thinking about this because I was driving to work and had nothing better to do. I'm not getting separated or divorced or anything, but I was curious....
What is the purpose of a married couple getting "separated"???
I mean I see mass potential for misunderstanding here. Breathing room??? Sorting things out in one's own mind??? These aren't qualities that men typically espouse, so then the woman wishes to "work things out" by getting away from the man. Doesn't seem very logical....
Meanwhile, are the two allowed to see other people while "separated"??? Or is it still understood that they are married and sexless as long as they continue in this state of the relationship???
All in all it seems like a weird solution to a marital problem.
Yes, I'm ignorant as far as this is concerned. Someone enlighten me as to the purpose..... Thanks...
My ex and I had a legal separation as a way to an uncontested divorce. Basically, the separation agreement was the divorce agreement. We lived apart for a year with the legal separation in place, when the divorce papers were filed, it was the separation agreement with the divorce decree granted. We did not have any children together, but I *think* in some states, the separation agreement is necessary to move forward on custody, child support, alimony payments, etc., but I'm not sure. I think it also helps if the need arises for a restraining order against a soon-to-be-ex, should it become necessary, but again, I'm not positive. In my case, it documented that we had not lived together as a married couple for a year or more, and that was the grounds for the divorce, rather than having to go through a contested "open court" type of thing. Neither of us had to go to court, the lawyer just filed the papers.
During the period where we were "legally separated" we could date, see others, just couldn't marry anyone else <g>.
The legal separation is also not a "final word" like a divorce decree is, so I suppose, if a couple wanted to get back together, it would afford them some kind of "protection" while sorting things out. I had no intention of going back, but know people who did have a legal separation and ended up back together again.
Separation is originally "perscribed" for fasting and prayer.
The reason for separation was to seperate us from all our needs such as food, or companionship, so you would discover how "dependent" you are. Knowing and dealing with our naturally dependent nature makes us stronger and wiser. Your stomach is a powerful reminder how dependent we are, on our "needs". After 24 hrs with out food you'll know. No different for our hearts, we have needs for that as well.
When we strip away our fulfillment, such as a full belly and friendships for a short time, we discover that we can not exist without external help. You'll need to eat, and drink and you'll need companionship. The other , and maybe the more important reason, is we have to deal with ourselves. The real us.... the person who we are, alone and seperated from our needs that sustain us.... and then, when we see that person, hopefully we pray for help.
Most answers will be the "legal" ones... but seperation was about discovery, and still is.
Two master bedrooms = separation, separated, which is a healthy separated space.
My time, 'me time', 'I need to think' time = interest level down, game over!
Yes ladies...some of us have cracked the code. If I ever mess up and allow the ladies interest level to drop, (if it was even high to begin with) and I'm told how she needs some time to think. I'll break it off right there...because she just told me it's over in a 'hidden wordage' type of way.
"The only thing that should come back after it's thrown out, is the boomerang!" Dapper
I'm not married or seperated or anything either but I think its the males chance to find something better while retaining the right to go back if it fails...
I'm not married or seperated or anything either but I think its the males chance to find something better while retaining the right to go back if it fails...
Well see this is what I wondered. Especially in a year long separation I could actually see where the female would ask for the separation to "figure things out" or whatever and the male goes, "Well dang..... Might as well check out what else there is....."
That's why I didn't understand the purpose of it because I found it hard to imagine too many scenarios where it actually helps...... The first answer to my question makes the most sense and is probably most often why separation occurs rather than an outright divorce.
I think different people have different ideas about what a separation is, as you've pretty much explained.
I wouldn't do it unless there wasn't another alternative, because I would be afraid he'd take the opportunity to go around with other women.
When I told my husband I was considering it if we can't get some counseling or work out some of our issues, it was more of a warning thing. If he doesn't think "we" are worth the effort of trying to work it out between now and then, well then it is probably over . In that case, it would work as a time for us to get child support/alimony in order as well as decide 100% whether it is the end.
Maybe it was some law makers way or reducing paperwork, since a lot of people do get back together. Besides, actual divorce procedings are pretty expensive aren't they?
It all depends on the couple's situation.... Are they willing to work things out? Do they still love each other? Is one spouse having an affair?
I don't believe in 'separation' to try to save a relationship... but, sometimes it is the only way that one of the spouse will eventually understand that a change is needed.
I know a couple who tried something different... they, each, were living separately during the week and got together on weekends... they did it for one month... to think things out... it worked for them. They were not seeing anyone else...
If a separation is a mean for the partners to see other people...then it is doomed to fail...
If your husband wants some space, lock him outside!
It depends on if your talking about separation or legal separation.
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the first reason for separation...
