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Old 08-09-2011, 12:01 AM
 
2 posts, read 3,165 times
Reputation: 10

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Hey everyone,

As you can see by the title, I am a virgin male. 20 years old.

Girls love me. I have many female friends, and hit it off well with those I meet. I can spend hours flirting/holding a girl at a bar or party, and then never close the deal. I'm not sure why, any thoughts?

I have many questions about sex, maybe you will be able to help me.

-The first time, will I last like, 30 seconds? How do I fix this?

-Will I be super nervous? How do I fix this?

-Does sex end after the first ejaculation?

-Do girls like a man shaved down there? (I am)

-How long does sex in general last?

-Should I be ashamed of my virgin status?

-How do I get a girl back to my place from a bar/party?


And finally, and the most difficult:

Do I wait for it to me someone I like (not necc a gf or wife) or do I lose it to any drunk girl willing to give it?

Thanks.
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Old 08-09-2011, 12:40 AM
 
2,502 posts, read 3,042,641 times
Reputation: 1771
Don't be ashamed to be a virgin! Those guys who make you feel bad about it are azzholes and probably have many diseases!
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Old 08-09-2011, 01:32 AM
 
376 posts, read 519,693 times
Reputation: 397
nothing's wrong with you. you're good.
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Old 08-09-2011, 02:06 AM
 
Location: Davenport, Iowa
2,469 posts, read 3,449,030 times
Reputation: 3403
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smith-22 View Post
Hey everyone,

As you can see by the title, I am a virgin male. 20 years old.

Girls love me. I have many female friends, and hit it off well with those I meet. I can spend hours flirting/holding a girl at a bar or party, and then never close the deal. I'm not sure why, any thoughts?

I have many questions about sex, maybe you will be able to help me.

-The first time, will I last like, 30 seconds? How do I fix this?

I don't know if there's a way to fix this. There are methods, but there's really nothing else that feels like intercourse, so the feeling can be overwhelming

-Will I be super nervous? How do I fix this?

Probably, but there's nothing wrong with this. One way is to do it with the right girl

-Does sex end after the first ejaculation?

I'm not totally sure what this means, but you can keep going and do it multiple times.

-Do girls like a man shaved down there? (I am)

You should read the hygiene thread on here. Personally, I can't imagine shaving down there. I don't want to be out in public and wanting to scratch down there.

-How long does sex in general last?

There's no set time. I've lasted anywhere from 3-20 minutes. Some people are going to last even longer, but it's just a matter of what you and your partner are used to.

-Should I be ashamed of my virgin status?

Nobody should be ashamed of being a virgin. It's a lot better than having STDs or illegitimate children.

-How do I get a girl back to my place from a bar/party?

I'm sure confidence would help.

And finally, and the most difficult:

Do I wait for it to me someone I like (not necc a gf or wife) or do I lose it to any drunk girl willing to give it?

That's up to you. I'm glad I lost my virginity to a girl I loved. My former roommate lost it to a girl he barely knew and told me he regrets it. I would be careful hooking up with a drunk girl. That could lead to legal problems.

Thanks.
It seems like you're worrying about it too much. I was a virgin until I was 21 and I really didn't feel much stigma about it. You're plenty young and have plenty of time to experience these things. Also, you have to meet a special girl first!
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Old 08-09-2011, 03:46 AM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
3,653 posts, read 7,277,191 times
Reputation: 3677
You are only 20, give it time, it will happen. It seems like you're stressing yourself too much, if you worry about every detail, "it" might not work when it comes time.
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Old 08-09-2011, 07:59 AM
 
Location: NY
9,011 posts, read 14,244,168 times
Reputation: 11370
Your 20. Why the stress? Your doing fine!

As for with who, I cannot tell you how to decide that. I can only say I am very glad my first time was with someone I had deep love and feelings for!
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Old 08-09-2011, 08:10 AM
 
581 posts, read 1,038,482 times
Reputation: 339
a 20 yo virgin in these times? when all you have to do is tell a girl you are going to put it on youtube and she'll give in.
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Old 08-09-2011, 09:17 AM
 
861 posts, read 2,298,935 times
Reputation: 941
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smith-22 View Post
Hey everyone,

As you can see by the title, I am a virgin male. 20 years old.

Girls love me. I have many female friends, and hit it off well with those I meet. I can spend hours flirting/holding a girl at a bar or party, and then never close the deal. I'm not sure why, any thoughts?

I have many questions about sex, maybe you will be able to help me.

-The first time, will I last like, 30 seconds? How do I fix this?

-Will I be super nervous? How do I fix this?

-Does sex end after the first ejaculation?

-Do girls like a man shaved down there? (I am)

-How long does sex in general last?

-Should I be ashamed of my virgin status?

-How do I get a girl back to my place from a bar/party?


And finally, and the most difficult:

Do I wait for it to me someone I like (not necc a gf or wife) or do I lose it to any drunk girl willing to give it?

Thanks.

I'll answer your questions in order.

1) Most likely yes... Good luck making it to 30 secs... How can you help this... Condoms. They take away a lot of the feeling so use one. You can also "help your self" before the big date. That will take the edge off a little.

2) Yes... Nothing you can do really.... Just let it happen. The first time is awkward and strange. Each time after that will get better.

3) Only if you're and insensitive jerk. Cuddle afterward. Touch her etc... It will lead t round 2 then round 3 if you are "up" to it.

4) Thanks I didn't need to know that about you but generally girls like that kind of thing. I know I refer my GF be shaved and I'm sure she appreciated a neat place to play as well.

5) It lasts as long as you want it too. Sex is way more than just penetration. Do keep in mind that some women might get sore after a while.

6) Hell no... In fact telling a girl you are a virgin might get them back to you place faster. Some girls are turned on knowing they will be your first. Trust me. I was a virgin about 10 times

7) If you're already talking then just ask for their number and hook up at another time. Go out and spend some time together then ask her to come over for a beer and pizza or something like that.. Asking a girl over from the bar means one thing.. Come have sex with me... and they don't want to be a sex object. Asking her over after a day of shopping or the zoo could be just a friendly visit.

8) At 20 yrs old I wouldn't be too concerned with who you lose it to. I will tell you that you need to be safe. Wear a condom. If you are picking a girl up at a bar and she agrees to come home and have sex with you then she's done that with other guys as well. This should tell you a couple of things. Be safe and don't waste your time falling for her as you are just another guy in a long line.
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Old 08-09-2011, 12:28 PM
 
12,461 posts, read 14,607,415 times
Reputation: 14213
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smith-22 View Post
Hey everyone,

As you can see by the title, I am a virgin male. 20 years old.

Girls love me. I have many female friends, and hit it off well with those I meet. I can spend hours flirting/holding a girl at a bar or party, and then never close the deal. I'm not sure why, any thoughts?

I have many questions about sex, maybe you will be able to help me.

-The first time, will I last like, 30 seconds? How do I fix this?
Maybe, maybe not...it can't be fixed
-Will I be super nervous? How do I fix this?
Possibly, but there's no need to,...just enjoy
-Does sex end after the first ejaculation?
Doesn't have to, there's more to sex than intercourse
-Do girls like a man shaved down there? (I am)
Apparently...some do
-How long does sex in general last As long as you and your partner want it to
-Should I be ashamed of my virgin status?
Of course not!
-How do I get a girl back to my place from a bar/party?
Ask her to your place for a nightcap

And finally, and the most difficult:

Do I wait for it to me someone I like (not necc a gf or wife) or do I lose it to any drunk girl willing to give it?
Entirely up to you!
Thanks.
Hope that helped a little
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Old 08-09-2011, 01:30 PM
 
Location: Ohio
13,951 posts, read 10,336,654 times
Reputation: 7232
Quote:
Originally Posted by asitshouldbe View Post
You are only 20, give it time, it will happen. It seems like you're stressing yourself too much, if you worry about every detail, "it" might not work when it comes time.
Ditto on that, anxiety is akiller
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