No-nos - Does it make sense to rule out anyone? (sociopaths, how to)
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I was wondering if it makes sense to rule out being together with someone because of a certain trait, view, or property of his/hers.
Yesterday I was talking about these things with a friend of mine in a funny way, but still...it was interesting.
Being a vegetarian, I have basically ruled out all non-vegetarian woman for a long time. My friend said that in a country like this where there are hardly any vegetarians at all, I will likely die alone if I stick to my principles.
What are your principles regarding no-nos and would you be willing to give them up should you realized they are getting in the way of your happiness?
Perhaps you don't need to compromise, OP. Yes, it may be very difficult to find someone who is a vegetarian for the same reasons you are one, but you can find them. Of course, whether they are compatible in other ways reduces the chances, but there are bound to be some good matches. The thing is, HOW do you find them?
First of all, there may be groups of people who gather because of a belief or trait, if it's from a religious or philosophical perspective. There may be dating sites dedicated to people following a certain lifestyle, or ones that make screening for this easier. Putting yourself on such sites and clearly stating your preferences for someone with a similar outlook can help, too, so they can find you.
My ideal match is someone who is - at best - 1 in 100,000 women. I found 3 really great prospects (actually, they found me), one of whom stood out even from that select group. One of them was a vegetarian, but that wasn't part of my criteria, and she didn't mind that I was not. Decide what's truly important, and compromise as needed on other criteria.
Well, I guess I would have to move house as in this town families complete with children go to bullfighting spectacles as if it were a football match. Things such as animal rights only exist on paper here. I guess I am just in the wrong place.
Plus, deliberately meeting with vegetarians seems a bit artificial, as if trying to force one's luck if you get what I mean. But I guess if I were really serious about wanting to find someone I would do that.
I was wondering if it makes sense to rule out being together with someone because of a certain trait, view, or property of his/hers.
Yesterday I was talking about these things with a friend of mine in a funny way, but still...it was interesting.
Being a vegetarian, I have basically ruled out all non-vegetarian woman for a long time. My friend said that in a country like this where there are hardly any vegetarians at all, I will likely die alone if I stick to my principles.
What are your principles regarding no-nos and would you be willing to give them up should you realized they are getting in the way of your happiness?
I have not read all the comments but I will say, I don't care what anyone says, here or in "real" life, stick to your principles.
As was said in a movie, "It's better to be alone for the right reasons than together for the wrong ones."
If you are vegetarian for your own moral reasons, you will more than likely not get along with someone who is a meat eater because they will not fully and completely share your view points. This can cause problems.
It IS possible for polar opposites to be together but I think that is rare rather than the norm.
You'll hear people say that your standards are too high. I say, "Why settle?"
I used to have a girlfriend a long time ago who was not vegetarian. Although I don't think that was the only reason we broke up, I do think it was part of the problem. Since I was a Buddhist back then, I guess her nutrition reduced what I thought of her. She was a really nice person (we are still in contact 10 years later) apart from that and for some time I tried to pretend her nutrition didn't matter to me. I guess I am just too little tolerant and ignorant when it comes to that.
I doubt a Muslim and an atheist can be happy together.
The other person doesn't have to be the same, but I think compatibility is important. I don't believe in 'opposites attract', at least not in the long run. Since not eating animals is a moral thing for me, I guess I consider non-vegetarians a bit immoral, at least compared to me.
So you were a Buddhist that had attachment to vegetarianism.
Which is more immoral: eating meat or judging others? One is (arguably) harming other sentient beings, and the other is delusion.
I think everyone has things that are so ingrained into them that it would be a disaster to end up with someone who didn't at least respect those things, whatever they are. So yes, you should definitely hold to some standards or you will be in for a world of hurt down the road.
That's true. I briefly dated a smoker who smelled a lot better than most guys I see out on a daily basis. He was very hygienic and always kept clean and smelled good, despite his mouth lol (and even that wasn't all that horrible as some people make it out to be). I don't smoke nor do I like it, but I do think some people make it out to be like it's some horrific, monstrous thing the way they despise it. But hey, to each their own. Maybe I'm just not that sensitive to the smell or grossness factor of it. I think body odor is a million times worse than the smell of cigarette.
I think body odor is a million times worse than the smell of cigarette.
Why are you embarrassed by your opinion...? Because you don't fit in the witch-hunt mold?
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If she owns a puppy mill yes, but I cant imagine ruling someone out because a PROPERTY they own.
