U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 08-17-2011, 01:38 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas, NV
5,737 posts, read 12,021,450 times
Reputation: 3848

Advertisements

Has anybody ever been in this situation?

Both our names are on the lease and neither one of us can afford a place on our own. She wants to have a female friend of hers move in and give her our 2nd bedroom and she (the ex) share a room with me.

If Im going to start dating again (which Im trying to now) Id like to have my own bedroom and just have a guy zone where I can be a guy and she can be a girl

Has anybody been in this situation? We have 10 months left on our 12 month lease
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 08-17-2011, 01:51 PM
 
Location: US
5,145 posts, read 10,408,217 times
Reputation: 5326
Ehhh

Look for a release clause in your lease and move out under it while getting EVERYTHING in writing.

Been there done that.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 01:54 PM
 
2,502 posts, read 3,033,630 times
Reputation: 1771
Yep. Get out now!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 01:55 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 77,045,484 times
Reputation: 22814
Broken up in the same bed, I take it?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 02:02 PM
 
Location: St Thomas, US Virgin Islands
24,671 posts, read 55,454,116 times
Reputation: 26420
I assume the two of you are splitting the rent now and she moved into the 2nd bedroom? So why don't you move out and have the ex's girlfriend take your place? Your situation of still being under the same roof as the ex is whacky enough without sharing the same bed. Oh, you're in Las Vegas ...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 02:26 PM
 
Location: NW Indiana
39,334 posts, read 14,409,792 times
Reputation: 99358
I know two couples who lived together for quite some time after their DIVORCES were final, because neither could afford to live on their own at first. Weird situations. These were not very young couples like you, though, DavieJ, and they were in no hurry to start dating again.

I can't imagine adding another resident to your living situation. First, you should read every word of your lease agreement, because I suspect it says you are not allowed to sublet the apartment, nor to have anyone else living there who is not a party to the lease. If you break the rules, nosey neighbors may be inclined to squeal to the apartment manager.

If your ex's friend is willing to pay half the rent (which I doubt is the case), why not talk to the landlord about letting you out of the agreement and letting the new person in? Perhaps you could work that out.

If there's any way possible for you to move out, without breaking your lease and losing your security deposit, I highly recommend it. Under no circumstances should you allow your ex to share your room with you.

Anyway, why in the world doesn't your ex just share her room with the other girl? I don't get that.

You're in a tough situation, indeed.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 03:45 PM
 
Location: Florida
2,291 posts, read 4,742,383 times
Reputation: 5220
Aah....she can share her bedroom with her gf.

You pay half the rent...right? So, you have an equal vote. I would vote...No!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 03:53 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
10,314 posts, read 12,387,684 times
Reputation: 15385
You should look to move out and move on with life. Get a 2nd job, Do whatever it takes. It will be stressful enough as it is and you want to date again naturally. if you meet someone you like they will probably not be receptive to you living with your ex..and another woman to boot.

The Lion needs a new den. Get out and roar, and sharpen those teeth and claws for the hunt. Life stands still for no man (or beast.)

Keep us posted and best of luck OP.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 04:06 PM
 
2,596 posts, read 4,632,078 times
Reputation: 3949
That is an insane idea, guaranteed to cause 10 months of drama. It also has nearly a 100% likelihood of scaring away any quality girl who would consider dating you. The crazies may stay. Anyone sane will take one look at, "He shares a bedroom with his ex," and run screaming in the opposite direction.

If your ex is wanting to bring this girl in, great. Have her take over your half of the lease and she and your ex can be roommates. They each get a room. Then you move out and find somewhere else to live with a male roommate. Or whatever. But under no circumstances should you think that the scenario you're proposing is going to look appealing to women you're interested in.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-17-2011, 04:10 PM
 
3,408 posts, read 5,117,585 times
Reputation: 2432
Sounds like your Ex is trying to control you. By you sharing a room or even an apartment it's like if she can't have you, then no one can. Another roommate can take over your part of the lease. There's no reason it has to be you as the roommate, except to play games. If she's not cool with finding a replacement roommate, then she should move out and you should find a roommate.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:09 PM.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top