Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If her marriage was abusive, don't push too hard, it will come.
She has other needs that must be satisfied first, like trust and comfort. She'll be fine, just take your time and don't push too hard.
Sometimes, with real feelings, there's confusion. It will sort itself out.
I'm always surprised at how helpful and compassionate some people are. There are some thoughtful and senstive responses here. At the same time I'm surprised how insensitive some people can be. Tabularasa accuses the OP of thinking of himself. The OP wrote that she said she had been in a relationship after her marriage and had a good sex life, so I don't think the abusive marriage is as much of a factor, and not enough to accuse the OP of thinking about himself. He seems to be genuinely concerned for his girldfriends satisfaction and happiness.
Last edited by Cougargm; 10-03-2011 at 07:06 PM..
Reason: typo
This is a delicate subject so I will do my best to be tactful and not too graphic as I'm serious about what I'm going to write.
I'm wondering if my girlfriend is actually enjoying our love life and is satisfied even if she's not having "rocking her world" type orgasms.
She claims that she has multiple orgasms when we're intimate but they must be very mild because while I suspect she's having one I'm not positive. I don't see the eyes rolling in the back of the head, heavy stomach/groin contractions, etc that I've seen with previous partners. She's quiet and "purrs' a little but nothing approaching moaning.
We have a great connection and chemistry and are both very much in love, so the relationship is solid. We enjoy a lot of foreplay and cuddle afterwards. She loves to kiss and we kiss for long periods so I think the attraction is there. In other words I think the "intangibles' are there. I'm just wondering if she's really experiencing orgasms and if she is, is she really satisfied.
She's not a big 'talker' so she doesn't like to discuss the subject. She tells me she's content and if we discuss it she'll become paranoid and it could be more difficult for her so I shouldn't worry about something that's not a problem. I've asked her to 'show or tell me" what she likes but she hasn't, saying things are fine and she's happy.
I know I'm comparing her to previous lovers but that's a normal frame of reference. I love her very much and want her to be satisfied...but am wondering if she can really be having orgasms and multiple ones at that, and be content if they're not 'intense'.
From what you've said, she is ok with things as they are now. You seem to be the one creating a problem...
She might be self conscious about orgasms
I suspect that she must be self conscious since she didn't want to admit what she likes. I would leave it alone. AND try different things. She might like something better later, but might not admit. But just observe her and don't ask her directly. (since she doesn't want to say)
If she isn't complaining you are doing your job. If she wants sex with you, you are doing a good job. If she doesn't have a headache you are doing a good job. If she wants to kiss you, you probably brush your teeth and not taste or smell yucky.
Well, if a guy has to ask, he's not knocking it out of the ball park. It is totally obvious when ur man is handling his business and keeping u satisfied- u will let him know it! U don't have to ask "are u" when u are. Now u have the intangibles that's important and sex gets better the more u practice. U may not be knocking out the ball park without mercy now, but both of u can evolve in the love department. My question to the OP is are u being satisfied?
Hmm...I dunno dude; I'm a little skeptical that she's really having multiples. I mean, my wife screams like a banshee when she gets off. One time in a hotel room in Dallas she made so much noise that the guy next door, who happpened to be a cop, came bangning on our door with the night desk dude because he thought "there was some type of assault going on."
What's suspicious to me about your wife is that she "gets paranoid" when you broach the subject of orgasms. Most women I've met who are sensual and satisfied enought to have the Big O are also very open and honest when talking about it. In fact, they usually love to talk about it and tell what they dig most, and also make suggestions as to what more you can do to rock 'em.
One way you might be able to tell: my wife swears that when women have true orgasms their thighs quiver. She says this is the one thing chicks can't fake--like the moaning--and so you should look for this if you suspect she might not be gettin' off.
Hmm...I dunno dude; I'm a little skeptical that she's really having multiples. I mean, my wife screams like a banshee when she gets off. One time in a hotel room in Dallas she made so much noise that the guy next door, who happpened to be a cop, came bangning on our door with the night desk dude because he thought "there was some type of assault going on."
What's suspicious to me about your wife is that she "gets paranoid" when you broach the subject of orgasms. Most women I've met who are sensual and satisfied enought to have the Big O are also very open and honest when talking about it. In fact, they usually love to talk about it and tell what they dig most, and also make suggestions as to what more you can do to rock 'em.
One way you might be able to tell: my wife swears that when women have true orgasms their thighs quiver. She says this is the one thing chicks can't fake--like the moaning--and so you should look for this if you suspect she might not be gettin' off.
Contractions, quivering, toes curling, bed sopping wet, exagerated facial expressions, eyeballs popping out, finger nails digging into you til the point that you bleed are all indications that you are doing a fine job.
She could fake the toes curling and finger nails I guess, but no way would a women make some of those faces that they make on purpose. If you see this look don't freak out, you are gettin it done
this thread reminds me of the rolling stones " can't get no satisfaction"
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
