Making out with a guy who's not into it, but his manhood is at "full mast"? (friend, straight)
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Maybe the dude wasnt at "full mast". I had women mistakenly think I was at "full mast" only to be shocked that "mast" was only at 1/4 or 1/2 full.
Maybe they thought that was as far as you were going to get? How did you know they thought you were at full mast? They went for it and then said "Oh...I though you were hard but this is soft"? I am totally curious how this one went down! No pun intended, of course.
We women can generally tell when a man is only at half-mast. Because, well, he's not super-hard at that time.
I suppose there could be some dummies among my gender who just wouldn't realize that hard = erect and not very hard = not quite there. (The exception being a man who can't achieve a full erection, etc....he might be "ready" without being hard-hard, I guess.)
I can say (I did date someone over 40 with a li'l problem similar to the above, years ago) that if we girls realize you're just not going to get "there" (hard-hard), but you seem to want to do it, we're NEVER going to humiliate you by going, "Wait. This thing's not hard!" We're going to play along and try for it anyway, hoping you will get to that state. It's not necessarily that we don't "know" what hard v. soft is. We've had hard, we know hard.
it's really not that hard to understand. it gets hard when the wind blows... has very little to do with you.
As a woman, as a wife and as a mother of three sons, I agree with this. It's natural and getting an erection does not always mean the person actually wants to have sex -- there is a lot more that goes into it than just "I'm hard, so I'm going to do it with this person" -- in this case, it seems that it's about the guy not wanting the girl's emotional feelings to increase for him since he isn't on the same wavelength.
Erections happen routinely...they're supposed to...they're an indicator of physical health and they're "for practice" -- they don't mean a guy absolutely has to, or even wants to have sex at that very second. My children wake up with stiffies (EEeeeeeeewww! LOL) -- it surely doesn't mean they're ready to turn around and grab the first little girl they see (double eeeeeeeeeeeeeew). It just happens.
Well said JerZ,
A man can get an erection or a woman lubricated and does not mean they will have sex. If either man/woman doesn’t want to do it, let it be. Their decision has to be respected.
The stiffest stiffies are the first thing in the morning ones when all it means is "Dang I gotta pee!" But if after peeing it still wont go down,all I can say is "Baby. Come to Daddy!"
it's really not that hard to understand. it gets hard when the wind blows... has very little to do with you.
It wasn't just about the hard-on, it was about getting into the cuddling position, spending all day together and the mutual feeling/groping/kissing occurring during the cuddling. In other words, it was about the mixed signals and the context in which the hard-on was occuring.
If he tries to not "let you" talk to other guys, say "EXCUSE ME" in a firm voice and turn back to the guy you're talking to. Period.
no, no. It's way more subtle than that. This guy is a very friendly guy and when he interjects himself into the conversation, he's like, "Hey what's up guys? What are you all talking about? *big smile*" But basically he takes the conversation away from just the other person and myself. I can't exactly be rude to him when he's doing that, unless I want to look like huge beeyotch.
It wasn't just about the hard-on, it was about getting into the cuddling position, spending all day together and the mutual feeling/groping/kissing occurring during the cuddling. In other words, it was about the mixed signals and the context in which the hard-on was occuring.
same thing applies... erections have little to do with what else is going on.
for all you know, he is into you but was having a genital herpes breakout and didn't want to spoil the moment.
no, no. It's way more subtle than that. This guy is a very friendly guy and when he interjects himself into the conversation, he's like, "Hey what's up guys? What are you all talking about? *big smile*" But basically he takes the conversation away from just the other person and myself. I can't exactly be rude to him when he's doing that, unless I want to look like huge beeyotch.
So what? Then he can be part of the conversation. Is that a big deal? Smile and keep talking to your own guy. Make him be part of your (yours and the other guy/the potential date) conversation, don't have him take the conversation over.
However, simply "taking the conversation away from just the other person and (you)" shouldn't be something that prevents that other guy from eventually asking you out. Right?
How about this? Talk to him in private. Tell him you're getting the vibe that he and you are not going to be a couple, so you'd like to have a little more freedom to "circulate" in public circles. TELL HIM OUTRIGHT, pleasantly, that if he sees you with another guy, heck, you and he may be trying to get together...so butt out! Laugh when you say that last part to make it lighthearted but leave no room for doubt.
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How did you know they thought you were at full mast? They went for it and then said "Oh...I though you were hard but this is soft"? I am totally curious how this one went down! 
(The exception being a man who can't achieve a full erection, etc....he might be "ready" without being hard-hard, I guess.)
