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Old 10-12-2011, 02:08 PM
Status: "Life gives you what you need to awaken" (set 20 hours ago)
 
8,754 posts, read 6,043,948 times
Reputation: 18354

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Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
And playing role-reversal is not fine by those who like the gender status quo as it is. You may like your men to wear your panties, too; we don't. Some women's desire to be men will not shame other women into feeling guilty for wanting to be women. Sorry.
I am a woman, I work and take care of my financial needs, just like you do. I see nothing wrong with role reversals if it suits both parties, it doesn't change the fact a man is a man and a woman is a women. I just don't buy into defined gender roles.

When my daughters were little I stayed at home and hated it. My then husband stopped working and stayed at home and cared for them and I went to work. He was happy, I was happy, the children were well cared for. That's what worked for us and that was over 20 years ago, so we were considered fairly radical.

Last edited by Djuna; 10-12-2011 at 02:16 PM..
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:09 PM
 
15,093 posts, read 8,479,859 times
Reputation: 11917
Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna View Post
It's different when you have kids. I am talking about women who stay at home and expect to be taken care of financially.
Ohhh, yeah no I'd be bored to death!

What most working people do at night, I do in the day...so that I can taxi my kids around at night and on the weekend (travel sports).

When they are out of this stage there isn't enough here to keep me occupied.

I'm going back to school soon...preparing for when this happens.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:13 PM
 
Location: Cumberland Co., TN
11,425 posts, read 11,379,212 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna View Post
I agree. The little princesses couldn't possibly fathom not having their sugar Daddy take care of them...as if they're still children living at home with their Mummy and Daddy.

Playing house is for 4 year olds.

Grown up women get a job and bring something more to the household.
I didnt mean to imply they had a princess mentality. Its just interesting that there seems to be that divide.

I dont know that I wouldnt feel the same had my life been different. I have always worked, before I married and as a single parent. I dont know if it is because I didnt marry "well" and my husbands couldnt or wouldnt provide a nice comfortable life and security or a fear of trusting someone else with that. Or watching my parents marriage.

Some women feel that taking care of the home and family is their responsibility and/or providing an income and security is their husbands responsibility. I guess its just a matter of how our lifes experiences has shaped us.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:16 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,843 posts, read 54,836,635 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna View Post
I am a woman, I work and take care of my financial needs, just like you do. I see nothing wrong with role reversals if it suits both parties, it doesn't change the fact a man is a man and a woman is a women. I just don't buy into defined gender roles.
As you may have noticed, the original post wasn't meant as a debate over the topic - at least not on the surface. At first I just shared my opinion; nothing else. Just go back and see the supporters of which side of the issue started the attacks... That speaks volumes on its own.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:16 PM
 
Location: Virginia Beach
7,277 posts, read 3,200,040 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
They don't have to. They can just find other people on the same wavelength - like any other preference.
*shrug* If they wanna find others with their heads in the sand, that's mighty fine.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:18 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,843 posts, read 54,836,635 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phantasy Tokoro View Post
*shrug* If they wanna find others with their heads in the sand, that's mighty fine.
Yes, they can find compatible people - that's for sure. Now, whose head is where is very much debatable.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:18 PM
 
15,093 posts, read 8,479,859 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares View Post
Some women feel that taking care of the home and family is their responsibility and/or providing an income and security is their husbands responsibility. I guess its just a matter of how our lifes experiences has shaped us.
And sometimes it depends on who makes the bigger paycheck. My husband made a lot more money than I did and had better benefits so it was the logical choice for me to stay home when we had kids.

We weren't rolling in the cash by any means but it was the best situation for us at the time (and still now).

If he ever lost his job I'd have no problem going back to work...even then on my salary we could barely make ends meet...but it would at least pay some of the bills.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:20 PM
Status: "Life gives you what you need to awaken" (set 20 hours ago)
 
8,754 posts, read 6,043,948 times
Reputation: 18354
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares View Post
I didnt mean to imply they had a princess mentality. Its just interesting that there seems to be that divide.

I dont know that I wouldnt feel the same had my life been different. I have always worked, before I married and as a single parent. I dont know if it is because I didnt marry "well" and my husbands couldnt or wouldnt provide a nice comfortable life and security or a fear of trusting someone else with that. Or watching my parents marriage.

Some women feel that taking care of the home and family is their responsibility and/or providing an income and security is their husbands responsibility. I guess its just a matter of how our lifes experiences has shaped us.
I also agree with this.

I watched my Mother being 'taken care of' by my Father. She had no real power over anything. I was absolutely not going to be like that. I wanted to be treated as an equal. Earning your own money equalises the power balance whether you are a man or a woman.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:36 PM
 
Location: Cumberland Co., TN
11,425 posts, read 11,379,212 times
Reputation: 11670
Quote:
Originally Posted by BajanYankee View Post
It doesn't matter whether it exists or not (though in this vast and great land, the chances are that it does). I have several guy friends who've said that they don't really care about how much a woman makes or how ambitious she is. What they want is (a) a woman who's a good caretaker and (b) a woman who "keeps it tight." That means she works out, gets her hair done regularly, and always wears sexy outfits. It's a fair exchange in their minds: "I'll bring home the bacon, you take care of me and the kids and look beautiful."

So I was wondering if it also worked the other way around. Would women be okay with the "I'll bring home the bacon, you take care of the home and keep those arms ripped" arrangement?
I honestly think women would be more concerned with the good caretaker part than they would with the guy working out, wearing sexy clothes and staying waxed and plucked.

The funny thing is the guys I know that value this ended up divorced and bitter, as in line with the moaning Ive heard on CD, crying how their wife got board taking care of them and being pretty and left them for another guy and how she got half of his stuff and he is having to pay CS and alimony. I know someone in this situation right now.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:40 PM
 
2,495 posts, read 2,499,646 times
Reputation: 1803
Ill be a stay at home dad but im not eye candy more like eye asparagus
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