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Old 10-15-2011, 03:06 PM
 
1,833 posts, read 2,088,822 times
Reputation: 1611

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sagitarrius48 View Post
They do want careers, though, but be able to have the luxury of giving them up when the time comes for a family. They want to stay home and be moms and not worry about working and raising children; but they also want to find someone who will be a life partner.

Doesn't work that way anymore. Two incomes are needed, especially if there are children involved. If I do get married, she will be working with or without kids. I need an equal partner. If she wants to be taken care of, that's what her daddy is for.

 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:11 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,199 posts, read 20,196,508 times
Reputation: 22098
Quote:
Originally Posted by WakaFlocka View Post
Doesn't work that way anymore. Two incomes are needed, especially if there are children involved. If I do get married, she will be working with or without kids. I need an equal partner. If she wants to be taken care of, that's what her daddy is for.
Well, as a brand new stay at home mom... let me just say that taking care of a baby is a full time job. And day care can be very expensive. Sometimes it is wiser to have someone stay at home with the children than it is to pay for child care. And simply because someone stays at home with the children - husband or wife - it does not mean that there is an unequal partnership. Success in a relationship is about so much more than how much each person makes.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:13 PM
 
1,833 posts, read 2,088,822 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
Well, as a brand new stay at home mom... let me just say that taking care of a baby is a full time job. And day care can be very expensive. Sometimes it is wiser to have someone stay at home with the children than it is to pay for child care. And simply because someone stays at home with the children - husband or wife - it does not mean that there is an unequal partnership. Success in a relationship is about so much more than how much each person makes.

I'm not doubting that. No one said a married mother has to bust her hump, working 50-60 hours a week. But she at least should be working part-time. It's my obligation and responsibility to support my kids. My wife, not so much.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:16 PM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
3,653 posts, read 7,288,850 times
Reputation: 3677
Quote:
Originally Posted by WakaFlocka View Post
I'm not doubting that. No one said a married mother has to bust her hump, working 50-60 hours a week. But she at least should be working part-time. It's my obligation and responsibility to support my kids. My wife, not so much.
You are funny!! Just sayin' .....I bet, single too.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:17 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,199 posts, read 20,196,508 times
Reputation: 22098
Quote:
Originally Posted by WakaFlocka View Post
I'm not doubting that. No one said a married mother has to bust her hump, working 50-60 hours a week. But she at least should be working part-time. It's my obligation and responsibility to support my kids. My wife, not so much.
Every family is different. I don't tell other people what they should or should not be doing. I don't tell my working friends that they should be at home spending more time with their children and my friends don't tell me that I should be out searching for a part time job and leave my newborn at home. In my case, at this point in time, working in my field is not even really a possibility. And any part time job I could get would probably wind up in us losing money because of having to pay for a babysitter.

Things are not as black and white as you seem to think they are.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:17 PM
 
1,833 posts, read 2,088,822 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by asitshouldbe View Post
You are funny!! Just sayin' .....I bet, single too.

And since you have nothing to contribute, you'll just throw out indirect insults instead.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:20 PM
 
221 posts, read 283,796 times
Reputation: 258
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yzette View Post
Which is why I consider this yet another gender-bashing thread.
HAHAHA @ science being gender bashing. Some people just can't take criticism. The numbers don't lie.

Women, for the most part, like to marry up, and they are doing so in higher numbers than in the past. You can either try to use personal anecdotes which aren't anywhere near the norm to try to correct the dissonance in your mind, or you can accept the science.

Who says that's a bad thing anyways? I don't have a problem with people having preferences, I have a problem with people denying that people have preferences, attempting to force others to live by thier preferences (especially when those preferences create and perpetuate inequalities in society) and lying about their own preferences, a phenomenon which is rampant on this board and in real life.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:22 PM
 
Location: Washington County, ME
1,549 posts, read 2,254,429 times
Reputation: 1863
Hmmmm... I'm gonna weigh in, becuz i've kind of been in both situations. Not married to a "rich" man, but married to someone who made good money, while i also worked. He made more than me nevertheless. (When we got married, both of us were just starting out working.) I lived a very comfortable life money-wise.

We had 2 cars, a motorcycle, a nice house, a boat, 2 dogs, went on vacations...

He ended up drinking, cheating, being a big ol' a-hole...

When we got divorced i got a small amt of money, and put it away, and got an apartment. I had to get a better job to be able to live on my own. So i did, and busted my butt for 19 years, every shift imaginable, tons of overtime, and made really good money.

I bought my own house, my own car, and took care of myself. I knew i'd never want to totally depend on a guy - becuz of the marriage i'd been thru, and becuz of what i'd seen a relative go thru w/someone she was going to marry. You have no security, even tho you think you do.

That's just my opinion. If someone feels they would be fine w/a rich guy, and not having their own financial independance - to each their own!
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:22 PM
 
1,833 posts, read 2,088,822 times
Reputation: 1611
Quote:
Every family is different. I don't tell other people what they should or should not be doing. I don't tell my working friends that they should be at home spending more time with their children and my friends don't tell me that I should be out searching for a part time job and leave my newborn at home.

Exactly, because it's none of your business. Just like your situation is no one else's business.


Quote:
In my case, at this point in time, working in my field is not even really a possibility. And any part time job I could get would probably wind up in us losing money because of having to pay for a babysitter.

Hence I said part-time, not necessarily full. And there's no parent or other family member that could babysit occasionally?


Quote:
Things are not as black and white as you seem to think they are.

Never said they were black and white, nor do I think they are. My kids are my responsibility. I am under no obligation to financially support my wife. And considering many households have both parents working, it seems that wives simply have to work.
 
Old 10-15-2011, 03:24 PM
 
Location: WI
436 posts, read 1,564,725 times
Reputation: 482
I find these threads amusing, they make me feel like I live in an alternate universe (unfortunately there are no flying monkeymen in my universe either).

Other than when I was working my way through college, I've always made more than boyfriends and then husband. From what I see in the possible dating world I would still be making more. I don't really care as long as the person works hard at whatever job they have and doesn't expect me to support them. Since I'm a fully functioning adult there's no reason for me not to be able to support myself and my child. I would like to have a partner to share my life but I definitely don't need a sugar daddy! I enjoy being independent.

Last edited by Dea13; 10-15-2011 at 03:26 PM.. Reason: typo
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