So this is exactly why I'm single.. (kissing, college, pictures)
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You guys are gonna love this. I swear ONLY me again!! Kinda long so enjoy!!
So I went back on Match and of course I'm getting responses from people I would NEVER consider but that goes with the game. However, a 45 yo guy who caught my eye had emailed me so I gave him my cell after a few emails and he called me yesterday morning. We had a decent conversation except he was hasseling me about my cat Anyways, we decided to meet for some drinks at 6:30. Well around 3:30 my mother (who's sick with stage 3 lung cancer) calls me and asks me if I'd like to come over and make stuffed shells with her and have dinner with my parents. So of course I'm going to spend time with my sick mother over any first date because I don't know if she'll be around next year. So I call the guy and tell him that somethings come up and ask if we could reschedule. The guy was ok with rescheduling. I said I had plans Thurs and Friday so if he wanted to get together Sat if he was available that would be great. He said that he doesn't like making plans that far ahead. He then says "When you want to go out with me, you call me" and hangs up! I call him back and asked if he hung up on me? He starts telling me I'm rude for cancelling and that obviously I'm not interested. I said "I could have texted you instead of calling you but I called you and it's 3 hours prior not 20 mins. I am interested in meeting you so that's why I asked if you would be available Saturday." Then the guy goes on a rant about how all women are selfish and I'm just the typical woman and basically berates me!! I said "Obviously this isn't going to work out and I wish you luck on Match" and hang up.
Here comes the fun part!! He starts texting me these crazy ass texts. Keep in mind this guy is a successful 45 year old.
Him: U r a joke and a liar. U r single and alone. Games and unsolicited advice unacceptable. Selfish girl bad news. U made plans break plans. U r unreliable person.
Me: What?? Do you actually speak to a woman like that and expect to get a favorable response? You're 45 and acting like this??
Him: U do not deserve any different when u r rude. U get what u give. Goes both ways and dont care. U suck. Sorry have another date tonight. U r backup dont bother me u lose rude woman
Me: I'm sorry but calling you 3 hrs to tell you I can't make it tonight and would like to reschedule is not rude. I don't know where you got your manners from but you are completely out of line.
Him: From women like u. So r u take responsbilitiy for your behavior. Works both ways.
Me: Stop texting me
Him: Yes stop texting me. U r harassing me. I have no money for u. Do not contact me again
I mean WTF??? Are you Fing kidding me??
a) If I were ever thrust back into the dating world I would definitely have a land line.
b) I would have not responded to the first text.
You guys are gonna love this. I swear ONLY me again!! Kinda long so enjoy!!
So I went back on Match and of course I'm getting responses from people I would NEVER consider but that goes with the game. However, a 45 yo guy who caught my eye had emailed me so I gave him my cell after a few emails and he called me yesterday morning. We had a decent conversation except he was hasseling me about my cat Anyways, we decided to meet for some drinks at 6:30. Well around 3:30 my mother (who's sick with stage 3 lung cancer) calls me and asks me if I'd like to come over and make stuffed shells with her and have dinner with my parents. So of course I'm going to spend time with my sick mother over any first date because I don't know if she'll be around next year. So I call the guy and tell him that somethings come up and ask if we could reschedule. The guy was ok with rescheduling. I said I had plans Thurs and Friday so if he wanted to get together Sat if he was available that would be great. He said that he doesn't like making plans that far ahead. He then says "When you want to go out with me, you call me" and hangs up! I call him back and asked if he hung up on me? He starts telling me I'm rude for cancelling and that obviously I'm not interested. I said "I could have texted you instead of calling you but I called you and it's 3 hours prior not 20 mins. I am interested in meeting you so that's why I asked if you would be available Saturday." Then the guy goes on a rant about how all women are selfish and I'm just the typical woman and basically berates me!! I said "Obviously this isn't going to work out and I wish you luck on Match" and hang up.
Here comes the fun part!! He starts texting me these crazy ass texts. Keep in mind this guy is a successful 45 year old.
Him: U r a joke and a liar. U r single and alone. Games and unsolicited advice unacceptable. Selfish girl bad news. U made plans break plans. U r unreliable person.
Me: What?? Do you actually speak to a woman like that and expect to get a favorable response? You're 45 and acting like this??
Him: U do not deserve any different when u r rude. U get what u give. Goes both ways and dont care. U suck. Sorry have another date tonight. U r backup dont bother me u lose rude woman
Me: I'm sorry but calling you 3 hrs to tell you I can't make it tonight and would like to reschedule is not rude. I don't know where you got your manners from but you are completely out of line.
Him: From women like u. So r u take responsbilitiy for your behavior. Works both ways.
Me: Stop texting me
Him: Yes stop texting me. U r harassing me. I have no money for u. Do not contact me again
I wonder if some of this is age related. As I grew up 3 hours before is last minute. When you cancel at the last minute you owe a brief explanation. I don't care if its for a date or meeting an adjuster to get an estimate on your car. Other people value their time as much as you value your time and an explanation is a common an expected courtesy. The guy sounds like a Richard and you dodged a bullet there but that doesn't change the fact that IMO you did not hold up your end of the log either.
I wonder if some of this is age related. As I grew up 3 hours before is last minute. When you cancel at the last minute you owe a brief explanation. I don't care if its for a date or meeting an adjuster to get an estimate on your car. Other people value their time as much as you value your time and an explanation is a common an expected courtesy. The guy sounds like a Richard and you dodged a bullet there but that doesn't change the fact that IMO you did not hold up your end of the log either.
To some stranger? "I can't make it" is info enough. I don't think anyone who is normal who respects boundaries would ask for details. They just wouldn't ask you out if it was habit.
To some stranger? "I can't make it" is info enough. I don't think anyone who is normal who respects boundaries would ask for details. They just wouldn't ask you out if it was habit.
Umm yeah. Even some stranger!
As crabman said, I would give more explanation than 'something came up' to my car mechanic, along with a 'sorry'.
This is someone the OP was considering as a relationship potential, first time meeting or no!
I don't get it, where are the manners in all this? I'm kind of shocked at the number of people who think canceling on short notice with zero explanation is ok.
I agree with e'erybody that the guy was a total ass, good thing you didn't go out with him. On the other hand, I've been on the receiving end of "Something came up, and I can't make it" several times, and to be honest I would have liked a slightly better answer, so I can understand why he could have been irritated (but then he acted like a juvenile brat afterwards).
OP, good luck with the next date, and you made the right choice by going to see your mama.
To some stranger? "I can't make it" is info enough. I don't think anyone who is normal who respects boundaries would ask for details. They just wouldn't ask you out if it was habit.
I wouldn't ask for a reason but I feel it's courteous to tell let me know why beyond "Something came up." She has every right to say that but chances are I wouldn't contact her again.
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Anyways, we decided to meet for some drinks at 6:30. Well around 3:30 my mother (who's sick with stage 3 lung cancer) calls me and asks me if I'd like to come over and make stuffed shells with her and have dinner with my parents. So of course I'm going to spend time with my sick mother over any first date because I don't know if she'll be around next year. So I call the guy and tell him that somethings come up and ask if we could reschedule. The guy was ok with rescheduling. I said I had plans Thurs and Friday so if he wanted to get together Sat if he was available that would be great. He said that he doesn't like making plans that far ahead. He then says "When you want to go out with me, you call me" and hangs up! I call him back and asked if he hung up on me? He starts telling me I'm rude for cancelling and that obviously I'm not interested. I said "I could have texted you instead of calling you but I called you and it's 3 hours prior not 20 mins. I am interested in meeting you so that's why I asked if you would be available Saturday." Then the guy goes on a rant about how all women are selfish and I'm just the typical woman and basically berates me!! I said "Obviously this isn't going to work out and I wish you luck on Match" and hang up. 
He starts texting me these crazy ass texts. Keep in mind this guy is a successful 45 year old.
