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Originally Posted by Djuna
It's really quite funny how a celibate man who is 33 years old or whatever, can lecture people on sex.
What on earth do celibate people know about relationships or sexual encounters?
Now an experienced woman like myself on the other hand  |
An experienced woman, you mean a prostitute? Yeah, I am sure you can teach a lot of us what not to do in the realm of sexual relations.. You yourself admitted that you use to take money for sex and now somehow I have no right to lecture on sex because I am celibate. Perhaps, I can say the same about you, as you put to shame the act of sex, itself. BTW, did any of those men who paid you for sex have wives? Were they married? Perhaps, you helped contribute to destroying marriages and families. I wonder if you thought of the full implications of your actions. Of course, who am I to expound such a discourse condemning sexual deviance. It is like condemning a drug counselor for speaking out against heroine use, because he never used heroine. Or, perhaps condemning someone against ped0phila because they never tried it. Just because you don't engage in a certain activity, like premarital and promiscuous sex, doesn't mean you are inelligible to share your beliefs about it. I've seen enough miserable people as a result of cheap and loveless sex destroy their lives to understand that I never would want to engage in such activities.
As far as having sex with my wife, the fact I never had sex with any other women, means she will be much more special to me. We will have much more passionate and love-filled sexual relations. They say sex is 80% mental anyhow. Most whoremongers and whores these days are never satisfied with sex as they just never feel the same climax they had in the beginning. Sound familiar like a drug addict perhaps? I want the deep and passionate romance with my wife to never end. There is a saying in our teachings, "
Good Things Come To Those Who Wait".
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Originally Posted by coolhand68
This discussion is not about infidelity or selfishness. It asked about whether or not most men care how many partners their S.O.'s have had. It's relating to the past, not the present.
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I am open to forgiveness for past sins.. However, being a virgin, I'd rather not marry a woman who has had sex with almost a dozen different men. However, if she has had sex with 9 men and has been abstaining from sex for a few years, maybe I would be more open to that. Even though it may bring shame on me in the Orthodox community, if I felt her heart was pure I woudl be willing to overlook the past sins, as I know my God, Elohim would do as well. However, if she is coming fresh out of another one of her failed relationships with 9 men under her belt and had sex like a week ago, I'd rather not become #10. If a man/woman truly wants to change his/her ways and repent for past sins and will prove themselves, I think amazing things can happen.
Let me use my cousin Elisa Hannah for example. When she was younger, she hung out with bikers, screwed lots of guys and did hard drugs. Well, she hit rock bottom in her life and left Los Angeles and moved to Brooklyn. She spent a long time making Teshuva (a spiritual return/repentance) for her evil acts and went through a long period of abstinence. Then, she converted to a very strict sect of Hassidic Judaism and became a Hassidic woman. She married a very strict religious Hassidic man and ended up being a very loyal and devoted wife with about 10 kids. My parents told me they never saw her when she was not pregnant. She was loyal and loving to her husband and is still married to him and a grandmother now. So, indeed, there is forgiveness for past sins, but many who live in these sins will never overcome or leave behind the bad lifestyle or even admit it is wrong. After all, people like me are just religious nuts, anyway. Carry on with your lewdness, don't mind a weirdo like me
LOL
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Originally Posted by coolhand68
MysticalDream: I would like to start another poll to counter that of Serentiy
Who is stopping you?
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Not who, but what. I have a cold and I am tired and overworked, so I will do it when I have time.. Serenity and others have inspired me to start the poll.. It would be very educational statistical analysis for myself to learn.
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Originally Posted by coolhand68
Again, you are basing your claims from a religious perspective which not everyone shares. If you want others to be tolerant and respectful of your choices, you must extend the same courtesy without judgment...or does your religion preach that members of your faith are free to judge their fellow man at will?
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Indeed, we are free to judge others. Especially, when they do evil deeds. However, it is up to Elohim, Our God to carry out sentencing for the judgments. I'm not an new-age Christian who believes you can rob a liquor store and I have no right to condemn you for the act, because that is "judging". In Our religion, we are very strict and we don't tolerate wrongdoings without rebuke. That extends to ourselves. Basically, it is like we don't view anybody as superior or inferior, we view actions as right or wrong. If you are the head of your community, a well respected individual and you do an evil act, you will be condemned even greater than a person who is outside the community and not so respected.
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Originally Posted by coolhand68
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MysticalDream: How long has your marriage lasted and how many previous sex partners did you have
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The two have nothing to do with one another and there are way too many variables at play. You might say that anyone who had multiple partners is incapable of loyalty, someone else might say you are loyal not only because of your religious beliefs, but perhaps you're a social anorexic and ugly as sin, therefore, you don't have any other options and you'll remain in a relationship because you have no where else to go.
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I might be bloody ugly as h*ll itself, freaky, weird and total reject of nature. I might have a mutated face, stinking breath and scare all the children whenever I come into the room. And, because I am so hated all the people flee at the very sight of me.
Or, I may be a very handsome man, strong, athletic who woos all the women, but pushes them aside at a whim. Yes, it could be that I am chiseled like gold and as pure as a Greek god who would never lower himself to devote his time to hmmppf, woman..
Possibly, I might be an average Joe, not Fabio, but not the Elephant Man either.
I think I can honestly tell you my devotion to God has nothing to do with being horribly ugly and a freak of nature. I'm a very sociable and likable person and decent enough looking. Let's put it this way, I see a lot less handsome guys than myself who have slept with a lot of women. Also, I don't fear women and have no problem talking with them and being rejected or accepted by them. I've been rejected, as well as had women ask me to come home with them (for you know what) the first night I met them. I did spend some of my younger pagan days at bars which was a big mistake. It was a shocking to see how easily even some very pretty 40 year old women would give it up to a 19 year old guy. Yes, I was underage when I did the bar scene.
If you want to see my picture and judge if that is why I am all alone and reviled well I guess I will have to take you up on your offer to disperse false speculation. I have no problem c2c for friendly chat.
Let me add one other reason why I am single and a virgin. For the last 12 years or so I have been working a very long hours and challenging job with my small, family software business. I have to work all the time and I work from home. It is not easy making a network of friends and girls when you have a home business and don't have a group of friends you grew up with or people you meet from the job. Not being a Christian or hippy/hipser pagan also means I have no real social group/society to associate with. Being a Netzarim Jew, I am also ostracized by my own Jewish people, who I deeply love, but whom refuse to have anything to do with me. I have sacrificed all the pleasures and playtime of my youth as I have great aspirations to start an orphanage to help children and one day become self-sufficient. Suffer now, rejoice later, that is my motto. Also, I do not approve of the lifestyle of most American women. However, I would be very happy to befriend them and leave aside personal/spiritual differences. On the other hand, I could most likely never marry them. I am waiting until I have enough money to leave the country and find a girl from another country to marry. That is not to say if a noble American women came along, I would totally put her away. It is just that I am very incompatible with American women, so why should I seek out a relationship? Also, I don't have the money to leave USA, so I will just stay single. Many foreign men are in this situation. Perhaps, many will just think I am a looney, I understand
