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Old 10-27-2011, 08:26 AM
 
2,345 posts, read 1,339,854 times
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It means let's not be like dumb teenagers, running off and making stupid decisions without thinking. It means exactly what it means. Things should go naturally, not coercion into commitment.
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Old 10-27-2011, 08:28 AM
 
1,120 posts, read 999,770 times
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If a guy says that in reference to your relationship status, then it means he is not looking for something serious.
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Old 10-27-2011, 08:31 AM
 
2,817 posts, read 2,341,088 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cwamjn View Post
Have you done sex?

Quote:
Originally Posted by nj21 View Post
NO way! I would've kicked myself if I would have and then I was told this.

You are talking about the relationship too early.

Many people here are not going to like this, but sex comes before a relationship, so if you are trying to establish some sort of commitment first, you are going to scare away most guys.

Rough rule of thumb. Date a few times, probably having sex within the first 5 dates or one month, whichever comes first. Within 3 months you start to get a feeling for the person, and they for you. Topics such as monogamy, dating others, etc will come up. In the 3-6 month period you start to define the relationship.
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Old 10-27-2011, 08:55 AM
 
Location: Emerald Coast, FL
4,486 posts, read 3,906,807 times
Reputation: 6938
I always "go with the flow", or try as best I can to do so. To me, it means not forcing a particular outcome, but letting that outcome develop naturally. That's the essence of Taoism. Some people may use that expression as an excuse to avoid making a decision, but I would not.
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Old 10-27-2011, 10:19 AM
 
Location: Maryland not Murlin
7,483 posts, read 14,495,595 times
Reputation: 4672
Quote:
Originally Posted by nj21 View Post
I would just like a guys POV from this infamous saying I have heard more than quite a few times, from a couple of guys I have dated.

What are the many meanings of this expression?
Generally, from a males perspective, it means that at the moment he is open to any and all possible outcomes, and wants to wait and see how things are progressing between the two of you before committing to go in any direction: letting things progress naturally, perhaps.

It could also mean that he is unsure about something with himself or you.

It could also mean that he knows he will not be interested in the long term, but doesn't want to say so because he knows/believes/feels/thinks that if he does, you will be ghost.

It could also mean that he is not over his last GF and is holding off until he develops deeper feelings for you, or that he is interested in someone else and waiting to see what develops there.

As annoying as some women find this statement, it is not something that can easily be categorized into one or two departments as the meaning can vary widely. By picking up clues through conversation, by the guy's actions, and by understanding the guy's personality, you should have enough clues to give you a good idea of what he is really saying.

But, if nothing develops in a forward fashion between the two you, say, after a few weeks (depending on how much contact you have with him), then he is probably not interested in you in the long-term.
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Old 10-27-2011, 10:23 AM
 
Location: in here, out there
1,680 posts, read 2,316,063 times
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He's still trying to figure out if you're crazy, or not.
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Old 10-27-2011, 10:36 AM
 
Location: Where Dance Music comes first
1,863 posts, read 1,416,716 times
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Isn't "Going with the flow" usually what most people do while courting?
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Old 10-27-2011, 10:47 AM
 
1,745 posts, read 1,350,298 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nj21 View Post
I would just like a guys POV from this infamous saying I have heard more than quite a few times, from a couple of guys I have dated.

What are the many meanings of this expression?
It mean you take the day as it comes; he doesn't want to DECIDE some formal
"from 18:00 this thursday the 27nd of october 2011 in the year of jesus christ, I henceforth declare that we are boyfriend and girlfriend"

just slide with it and go with the flow so to speak.
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Old 10-27-2011, 11:09 AM
 
Location: Whiteville Tennessee
8,257 posts, read 11,231,011 times
Reputation: 9753
"Go with the Flow" from a male perspective--"Lets see how well you can handle me belching,farting,leaving the toilet seat up and leaving empty beer cans and pizza boxes laying around the house before we commit."
Go with the Flow" from a female perspective--"That SOB is afraid to commit! He if he thinks I'm just a POA without commitment he is out of his ******* mind!
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Old 10-27-2011, 09:16 PM
 
1,842 posts, read 1,513,511 times
Reputation: 1207
Quote:
Originally Posted by TVandSportsGuy View Post
And females need to stop being so desperate to find a man and go with the flow
I don't like your assumption. Definitely nothing desperate about being dragged along for whatever the hell happens.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunshineleith View Post
OP why are they even saying ""lets go with the flow""? In other words, in response to what question of yours are they giving that answer? Are you perhaps trying to have the "where is this relationship going?" conversation a little too early in the relationship?
I never even asked that question, so I don't know whey he said this. He suggested we hang out then I just asked when. I never asked that question. I know men HATE that question and it scares them away.

Quote:
Originally Posted by fishbrains View Post
You are talking about the relationship too early.

Many people here are not going to like this, but sex comes before a relationship, so if you are trying to establish some sort of commitment first, you are going to scare away most guys.

Rough rule of thumb. Date a few times, probably having sex within the first 5 dates or one month, whichever comes first. Within 3 months you start to get a feeling for the person, and they for you. Topics such as monogamy, dating others, etc will come up. In the 3-6 month period you start to define the relationship.
I don't agree that sex comes before a relationship. Why buy the cow if you get the milk for free? That's just as bad as "playing house".
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