How do you deal with a boring spouse? (how to, man, cheating)

[crabman1]

Originally Posted by asitshouldbe

I've told him until I'm blue in the face. He usually says, "no one is keeping you here"...yeah, okaaay!

Act. Life is short and you never know when its going to be checkout time. This will not get better and the frustration will keep building up. I'm sure I dont need to tell you how fun divorce is, it might be a good idea to consider counseling. I have seen it help several couples over the years and it can help you (both) to see the larger picture. Particularly when it comes to complacency and the case of partners taking each other for granted. Maybe it doesn't work but you haven't lost anything trying. A little food for thought.... A guy I worked with didn't want to go out either. Thats not quite accurate though, he did want to go out. He just didn't want to go out with her. You said you have talked till you are blue in the face but did you listen?

[asitshouldbe]

Originally Posted by crabman1

Act. Life is short and you never know when its going to be checkout time. This will not get better and the frustration will keep building up. I'm sure I dont need to tell you how fun divorce is, it might be a good idea to consider counseling. I have seen it help several couples over the years and it can help you (both) to see the larger picture. Particularly when it comes to complacency and the case of partners taking each other for granted. Maybe it doesn't work but you haven't lost anything trying. A little food for thought.... A guy I worked with didn't want to go out either. Thats not quite accurate though, he did want to go out. He just didn't want to go out with her. You said you have talked till you are blue in the face but did you listen?

I've listened, well there isn't much talking on his part. When I bring up anything, he walks out of the room. I wait until I am driving us somewhere to talk, because then he can't leave the room.

[boisefan88]

Yawn.

This is not a big deal. I think you're being a bit melodramatic.

Do you always do things he loves to do that you hate? If so, I can see the deal. If not, well...

[lyra33]

Originally Posted by asitshouldbe

I've listened, well there isn't much talking on his part. When I bring up anything, he walks out of the room. I wait until I am driving us somewhere to talk, because then he can't leave the room.

Wow, that does not sound good at all. It sounds like he has has completely checked out of your relationship.

[asitshouldbe]

Originally Posted by boisefan88

Yawn.

This is not a big deal. I think you're being a bit melodramatic.

Do you always do things he loves to do that you hate? If so, I can see the deal. If not, well...

Go to bed if your so tired.

[Prairieparson]

IMHO, passive agressive means hidden anger, possibly at being dominated by a controling wife. Counseling might help, otherwise your marriage is just a competition, trying to one up the other and make their lives miserable. YOu might try to find some things you would like to do together. Maybe you do something he likes to do (without complaining) and then he does something you like to do. Fair is fair.

[dr74]

Originally Posted by asitshouldbe

So, we were invited to a few Halloween parties and mr. Boring doesn't want to go, he never does. I said I would go alone, but Mr. Passive Aggressive says, "It nice that you can go out"..what??? we were both invited. I sit home year after year doing nothing, I'm sick of it. He says fiiiinnne, I'll just sit here and watch the kids. I say, fine. you do that. He gives me the whiny eyeball, knowing he will complain forever if I go. So, here I am. Sitting at the table, drinking wine, he's watching a movie and we seem to have gained extra kids for a sleep over. Whatever!!!!!

Oh, and Happy Halloween Party Night, lets party in cyber world!

awww....lol....To be honest? You are allowing him to win...but you have your reasons, like you stated that you would never hear the end of it...

Maybe next year, you can opt to throw a Halloween party of your own and have the party come to you..

I am home tonight as well...My b/f works tomorrow and had a three hour drive back home...so I decided to stay in...I am not feeling too bad, I went to a huge party last year and that was a doozy...so a quiet Halloween weekend sounds good..

Cheers.

[asitshouldbe]

Originally Posted by Prairieparson

IMHO, passive agressive means hidden anger, possibly at being dominated by a controling wife. Counseling might help, otherwise your marriage is just a competition, trying to one up the other and make their lives miserable. YOu might try to find some things you would like to do together. Maybe you do something he likes to do (without complaining) and then he does something you like to do. Fair is fair.

We do things together on a regular basis. We camp alot and go to movies and dinner and shows, lots of things. We never do get togethers other than family and a friend here and there, when its more social, we never go.

[Soviet]

I move her into a different position and continue as before.

[lordvader44]

I'm from MN I will play with you if you want some fun