Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Oh, and I'd rather plan to take care of myself in my old age...put me in an assisted living home where I can be social! I'd be bored out of my mind stuck at my kid's house because I wouldn't want to bother them to take me places and keep me occupied...let me live with other old folks (if I must live to old age, which really isn't a goal of mine haha)
I have never had the slightest hint of a maternal instinct. I was raised with adults rather than kids and always got on with adults far more. I find children - well some children- quite delightful. For a couple of hours if they are well behaved and interesting which is extremely rare. And then you hand them back. Most children I find intensely boring, noisy, smelly and dirty. I like being alone or just with my Husband. I lack patience and interest when it comes to children.
I also believe that being a parent is the most important and most challenging job there is and should be left to those who are capable, willing and actually genuinely excited about the prospect of bringing not only a new life into the world but bringing up well behaved, intelligent, thoughtful decent human beings.
Having a child is the worst thing someone who is not fully willing could possibly do IMO. Most people I know who have kids lecture me about the wonders of having children whilst doing nothing but moan to me about how exhausting, boring and life draining it is. They call me selfish and yet many expect their children to look after them , as a given. Which is about as selfish as you can get. It is almost like raising slaves who will devote their lives to you. A form of "Carer cattle".
Having children so someone looks after you in your old age is to me utterly monstrously selfisly presumptuous. Babies should not be born to serve us when we are old and weak. If they wish to that is wonderful but to assume this is preposterous and incredibly arrogant beyond belief.
I have enjoyed the company of some children but on the whole most kids I meet are horrid little creatures.
I am 44 , a woman and have never not once regretted not having kids. I cannot think of anything I would hate more in my life. I would have had a hysterectomy in my early twenties if I had physically been well enough to cope with the surgery. Falling pregant has always been my greatest fear in the last 23 years. I cannot imagine anything more destructive for my life.
I have never cooed over babies, I prefer Dogs and Cats personally. I love silence, peace and quiet and being able to do what I like when I want. I love my relationship with my Husband and would never in a million years see it as an "improvement" to have a child with him. We enjoy the freedom to do as we please. If we want to get up at 3am and go for a drive we can. We can up and go anytime we want, go to a movie any time we feel like it or simply travel as we wish.
Contrary to what some people mentioned I am not interested in money but yes my lifestyle is important to me. I like being indepedent and having time to myself.
I have no desire to become a domestic slave simply because society feels I am a lesser woman if I do not procreate.
I think it is wonderful some people are born parents and Kudos to them. IMO very few people I see or know make good parents but those who are good are doing a stellar job and something I respect and have a profound admiration for. Good parenting is crucial for an orderly society and for the happiness and welfare of children. How we raise kids impacts on our society in so many ways and it is a grosslly undervalued job. But one that I think most people are not capable of handling.
People have children for so many different reasons but some of them are highly dubious ( like Elderly care or living vicariously through your progeny or simply wanting a little "you" to mould in your fashion, many people seem to want kids for Ego's sake rather than love and caring which is sad).
I despise people who have children and mistreat, abuse or neglect them, and neglect comes in so many different shapes. A child deserves love, affection, attention, time, discipline and the will to educate and allow them to develop into their own persons. They deserve respect and I fear many people I see offer nothing of the sort. Children to me should not be accessories nor should they be treated like little Buddhas and yet that is exactly what they are to so, so many parents.
I don't want children because I know myself, I know my limitations and because I think a child deserves better than me as a parent. I have no inclination towards parenthood and resent being told this makes me deficient. Being honest from the onset is far better than kidding yourself you are something you are not.
Men always seem to understand me but women always judge and pontificate about my failings as a woman. I am constantly being told that " one day you will want one", "one day you will understand", "your biological clock hasn't ticked yet ", " you are an un-natural woman" and all that kind of crap and it bugs me.
If people want to have children then that is wonderful but stop transfering your own set of values onto me.
A child is not a toy. There is no "supposed to" about having one. If you can love and cherish them , have the patience, stamina and will to see them through and raise them to become well adjusted happy human beings then that is wonderful. But assigning a "moral rectitude" value to my attitude to having kids is simply counter intuitive and quite fraknly boorish.
Hi, some people don't want to have kids, ever...anybody like to say why exactly? e.g Why don't you want kids, who do you expect to look after you when you get old etc..
I don't have any kids myself, but I'd like to one day, and I don't feel that my life would be complete without them.
I'm just curious, that's all. It can be a bit of taboo question so I thought I'd ask it on here...
Why don't you want kids...
#1) 18 years of child support.
#2) It opens me up to all kinds of liability for reasons I cannot even control.
#3) Relationships in today's day and age are iffy at best on a long-term basis, and a long-term basis is the only environment I would be interested in when it comes to raising children.
#4) See #1.
Who do you expect to look after you when you get old etc..
No one.
Slap your head all you want those things worry me. Raising a child is hard enough without having to worry if you can trust someone to watch your kids. Or some nosy women/man calling DSS on you these days. Sorry if you don't agree.
I'm too selfish right now to have kids. Until I know I can take care of them properly, I won't have them. If that never happens, then I never want kids.
I'm really enjoying these explanations. I don't think everyone is meant to have kids. And in my situation I had my kids while I was a kid, so if I meet someone, he has to realize I'm done raising kids
I have no paternal instincts and I believe I would be a bad father.
Also for all the people that say that people who are childless are selfish, isn't more selfish to lie to yourself and have a child even though you are not mentally and emotionally ready to be a parent?
What is selfish are these child-obsessed people forcing their mindset onto those who don't want kids and are deliriously happy not having them. It's hilarious that they apparently believe childless couples are "lacking something," missing out on a "fun life" and so terribly empty.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
